Living life, loving life.......hypno's having a ball!

redsquirrel80

That is good news. Glad you seem to be feeling a bit more up, are you looking forward to going out?

hypno06

redsquirrel80 wrote: »

That is good news. Glad you seem to be feeling a bit more up, are you looking forward to going out?

Not really :rotfl:

Have been tearful for most of the day.....but acknowledge that going out is probably what I need.....cocktails will either perk me up, or finish me off

And if, when I get home, I need to sob for hours, then I will allow myself to do so.....I have no kids at home tonight, so whatever state I end up in/wake up in, I have no worries.

Zumba then tomorrow morning to shake off whatever cobwebs/hangover I have.

I'll get there :cool:

redsquirrel80

hypno06 wrote: »

Not really :rotfl:

Have been tearful for most of the day.....but acknowledge that going out is probably what I need.....cocktails will either perk me up, or finish me off

And if, when I get home, I need to sob for hours, then I will allow myself to do so.....I have no kids at home tonight, so whatever state I end up in/wake up in, I have no worries.

Zumba then tomorrow morning to shake off whatever cobwebs/hangover I have.

I'll get there :cool:

:grouphug:

hypno06

And in the interim, thank goodness for Touche Eclat!!

beanielou

Hope you have a happy night.

ZTD

Karmacat wrote: »

Ooh, you left such an opening there :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

**goes off muttering about purposely missing opportunities to do the whole double meaning thing** :D:D

<Zed turns up the corrupting innuendo-ray machine to 11>

hypno06 wrote: »

FF - thanks. Now, can you please arrange for a solvent, suitably aged, gorgeous guy to have the same opinion, please? :rotfl:

:whistle:

MrsMoo2U wrote: »

Hey Hypno, I put my makeup on yesterday, high heels and all dressed up. Felt WOW. Nothing superficial about it at all. Whatever makes you feel good is what matters. As for suitable men, I am sure that you are being noticed but in this day and age lots of men are too afraid to comment for fear of being accused of something.

And that unfortunately hits the nail a bit too hard on the head.

macgirl

hypno06 wrote: »

I think this sums up how I feel perfectly - that feeling that right now, I should be full of energy and enthusiasm, along with knowledge of whats what......because I managed quite nicely (well, not nicely, but you know what I mean) with all the stuff in the past.

I remember when I had the house from hell, XOH (formerly known as OH) was the one who struggled - actually ending up having a mini-breakdown - and I was the one who did all the practical stuff, including arranging the finances, the builders, working full time - and all this when the children were just 5 and 6, so very demanding of my energies too.

It was only once the final decorating had been done after the build, and all the furniture was in place and everyone was amazed at "just how well i had done" that I hit my own problem. I walked the children to the childminder, and found that I couldn't walk home.....it was like my body had said it was now time for me to stop. Yet I couldn't immediately understand why it hadn't done so when times were really tough, because at that particular point, the work was done, the house was lovely, and I could surely just enjoy it.....

Of course, it is not just the breakdown of my marriage that has happened - it comes at the end of a difficult 10 years - starting with the above house from hell, 10 years of crippling debt, and losing my dad half way through.

Reading that last paragraph, it is no wonder I find "all things good" being a little wierd!


xxx

Oh love.....it really is no wonder.
I think going into autopilot and having a "project" to focus on, derails the breakdown for a period and allows your subconscious to slowly absorb the new reality. Otherwise you'd collapse and not be able to get out of bed for a month/months.

Outwardly, you have coped so admirably spinning all your various plates, giving yourself a "10 Years Younger" styley make-over in the process AND supporting the woes of the debt ridden nation.... As I said, it's no wonder it has finally hit you.
As my MiL is always reminding me, if you don't slow down, the body will do it for you. I guess yours is now wanting some downtime as payback for not letting you down this last year and a half.

I have not been through many of the traumas you have, which means anything I say will be totally inadequate. But you should perhaps allow yourself to wallow if that's what's required - maybe it's what you need? As someone said, a bit of introspection is good sometimes. Not to dwell necessarily, just to let thoughts flow through your mind so you can make sense of it.

If that doesn't work - do you fancy doing the bl**dy GNR for me on Sunday? I'm dreading it!!!

Take care, you know where I am xxxxxx

taxi73

Hope you're having a great night out.Totally agree with macgirl and if you need a cry just have one,,hope you feel better soon xxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

Just sending hugs in case Hypno

take it easy on yourself mate xxxx

hypno06

Macgirl, I would LOVE to do the GNR for you....I hope you have a fabby day and that you actually get to the start this time Please will you pm me your sponsorship details so that I can donate?

So, as expected, night out was a bit mixed - had a few comments of "you're quiet tonight" which I just tried to brush aside, but I just couldn't throw myself into things, and when one of the girls said she needed to leave early (ish) as she had work to do today, I was happy to jump up and say that I would share the cab, so I didn't stay out too long.

And yes, I sobbed when I got home. And no, I didn't sleep well either.

I'm up and watching the rugby, and will do Zumba mid morning and will just see how things go this weekend.

Thank you for all the hugs, the kind words and for putting up with what is turning into being a bit of a prolonged episode of bleakness!

And especially thank you for the picture of JD that I could finally see this morning :cool:

xx