100 months to turn the money situation round

elantan

de1amo wrote: »

I control all the money for the home outgoings and my wife pays for the day to day stuff like food out of her money. i joined the grocery challenge to ascertain what our actual expenditure was -i included everything that was consumed ie meals out and takeaways and was shocked to learn the amount we were spending--it seemed like a manic food binge was going on when i was accounting it!--we both realised we had to be more Os and since then we have halved our outgoing on food but not stopped living!-we have meals out for ocassions rather than habit etc

thanks very much for this ... i see alot of similarities with ourselves ... i hope what he does will make a difference ( like you have managed) ... i know our eating out and takeaways have to stop .. i have been saying this for a long long time .... maybe this way he will see this

redsquirrel80

elantan wrote: »

i told him it was cheaper ... i said look mr el being a veggie actually will save you money and help you do this ... to which he replied ... well not if we have to make two different meals ... i cant cook a big pot of mince and tatties for us all now can i ? sigh sigh sigh ... always finding the down side ...

he doesnt want to do meal planning either cause if we go to the shops and he see's something on special then we will have to use that up so that will throw the meal plan out ... he wants to look at what we have every day see what were having and then buy what we need ....

ok it is totally his choice and i am not going to interfere at all ... he has to do this his way ... in the way that makes sense to him and i have to let him learn ....

i think it may be a slightly tense month lol

Should be a good learning experience.. hope it doesn't get too tense!

elantan

thanks squizz i hope not too lol ... i think i may add a today i ate into my diary lol ....

de1amo

The actual accounting process seemed to make me realise the pigs we were making of ourselves-it seemed so manic to see all the amounts of bits and pieces being put down on paper-it was crazy -we work long days and were eating a lot of takeaways because we wre getting home so late-we reprogamed to eat more at work and snack at night--now we have more money from our long day's work to do other things with--more positive than eating!

elantan

The way you both were sounds very much like where we are just now .... I have tried different things over the years but as hubby couldn't / didn't want to be involved it did feel like I was banging my head on a brick wall sometimes ... Hopefully this will solve alot of those issues

de1amo

get him to join the site and join the grocery challenge because it will be an eye opener about how people cope on next to no money. it focuses you on how you can deal with your own targets or at least realise what can be gained from cutting down!-i couldnt follow all the rhubarb growing ideas but i got the gist that the cost cutting makes a big difference and it is within anyone's ability!-it isnt competitive or structured because we are all different but it certainly works!(i did worry that some people seemed to spend most of the day in supermarkets and questioned whether the fuel bill negated the gains!)

elantan

i have sent him the link for the cheap family recipes site ran by weezl and company ... i have also been trying (since i joined) to get him to join mse for various reasons ( alcohol support thread mainly) hopefully ... fingers crossed ... hopefully with this new way of thinking he might just do that ... i think i will send him a link for the os board as well ... and maybe the grocery challenge .. he might find those helpful ... thanks de1amo for your handy tips .... please keep em coming ... it helps knowing that youhave been where we are and that you have now effectively dealt with the issue ... i see your plans involve mfw as well ... so do ours ... ithink that might also be a good thing to spur him on

de1amo

i dont actually live in the uk--i am in Turkey so many of my lifestyle habits are odd ones!--people here dont shop in supermarkets but in local neighbourhood places-we shop as we return from work but i am known to pick up a bottle of alcohol!-i can understand drink problems in the uk because before i left in 2006 i was hitting the bottle hard and from what i gather the culture has become even worse in those 5 years--i know when i return to the uk on my holidays i spend the month over endulging-along with my wife who never drinks here(she is Turkish and muslim) she drinks in the uk because it is so easy cheap and readily available--if i was a suffering wife like you i would get on my high horse and make a crusade for trying to change the culture that has become engrained due to the opening hours and cheapness of alcohol--i would be dead if i still lived there i am sure!

elantan

i think it is very easy to become addicted to alcohol in the U.K ... it is a socially accepted norm to drink alot ... our t.v soap programmes are centered around pubs for example ....

it is easy to think of getting on your high horse and kicking off but the fact is ... none of that makes a difference to a drinker ... they dont care ... they want their drink and that is it ... changing the socially accepted norm would involve taking on industry, politics and the social structure of our society ... its a hard one to solve and really requires alot of people to do it ... i know my husband can now see alot of his issues clearer .. he can see the damage he was causing to both himself and his family ... he couldnt when he was drinking as much as he was ... it's only now that he can look and see the results ... alcohol seeps into every part of society and every part of our psyche ...

de1amo

i would guess a place like this with millions of contributors could start a revolution- i wont lie and say i dont enjoy a drink because i feel more relaxed in life with it but i now know how to respect it because the society around me doesnt encourage it! you can buy alcohol from most corner shops here but it is expensive against the local wages which limits it attractiveness! plus bars are not numerous! people go out to eat and have a drink with a meal and few places just serve alcohol and you aways sit down-i think British society has lost its way on alcohol and there needs to be education on a scale equal to smoking--alcohol kills and ruins lives!--