How to Get Through The Tough Times The Old Style Way.

maryb

Lavandula wrote: »

Well I thought my job was reasonably secure...ha what do I know...I will be made redundant (unless I choose to relocate to another country...no way!!) at the end of 2012:mad:

So at least that gives me some time to think what I will do in the future. I am the breadwinner and OH looks after our 6 yr old son. I earn 40K at the moment. I reckon I could live off the redundancy package for a least a year.

I now realize I have had a lucky escape. I was about to take out a 180K mortgage and move to a slightly bigger house...luckily I had the redundancy news before that happened and we had not made any offers on houses...

I also realize I am actually happy with my current house and was only contemplating moving because I could afford a much bigger house..

I am mortgage free and own my house, and feel like this is a new opportunity for me to escape the rat race and live an even more simple life that I was doing already.

Luckily we already have a decent size garden, and we have extended the veg beds and the plan is to become as self-sufficient in veg as much as possible. I am already very frugal and hate consumerism....hence I paid off my 70K mortgage in 9 years..for that I am very grateful!!

Up the workers!!

Lucky that you found out. If I had my time again I would underhouse myself rather than buy a money pit. Especially if the garden is already a decent size.

LIR I feel for you - been there done that - well, I say done that, we haven't finished (and we've been here long enough to pay off the mortgage!!). The roof will never be good news because it was originally covered in zinc and although it is pitched is it a very shallow pitch. We think we've sorted the leaks now and we have a high performance warm roof system developed for flat roofs - but oh boy, does it push the insurance premiums up - insurance companies like slated or tiled conventional roofs

mardatha

Quote from Juliette - "I too had an IB as a neighbour"...........

:rotfl::rotfl: I will keep reading "irritable bowel" for IB ... :D

Pitlanepiglet

Funnily enough it's the memory thing that makes me prefer this thread to the Daily thread. I always find that I feel very inadequate in there as it's full of posts with long lists of >>hugs to so and so for whatever<< and I have no recollection of what it relates to at all! It doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with the threads though, just that they are not for me so I don't read them (and thus don't feel quite so inadequate!).

Let's also not confuse general OS gripes - merging of threads etc with the "it's tough" threads, they are different issues.

I still find the "tough" threads friendly, I think people do say what they think and that's a good thing. It doesn't mean people have to fall out - I have found the "Idiot boy" saga uncomfortable reading - mainly I've just avoided reading it but that doesn't mean I don't have huge sympathy for GreyQueen and anyone else in her position and I wouldn't have said anything had others not been criticised for saying the same thing. It's been suggested to GQ that she writes a blog and I think that would be a great read as she writes very well.

We all have different views and should be able to debate as we would do around a kitchen table - there is no need for flouncing! Take a break for a few days and come back when it's all back in proportion - that was what I did when I had a spat earlier in the year.

As for congratulating re babies etc, to me that's part of "it's tough", people are often quite isolated and I think it is appropriate for support to be provided here - it shouldn't become the main part of the thread but I don't think it does currently. I had huge support when I was being bullied at work and I don't know where else I would have got such supportive yet practical and pragmatic comments other than from the OS'ers.

:A

kidcat

It looks like the morning after a hurricane in here today!!:) Strange how whenever a disagreement blows it always brings a load of others out too:D

As far as I can see whenever you get a group of people together no matter how similar minded there will always be a disagreement or two and sometimes it is better to ignore it and move on.


From an its tough angle I am starting to struggle as we are spending so much on the house move its draining the budget, and then today I get a call I hadnt expected from my solicitor who informs me that they expect to exchange in June (late June no less) - there has been no mention of this at all upto this point and when we last spoke to couple living in the house (its a PX - they are moving into a new build) only two weeks ago they were getting their keys this week and moving in next week, am absolutely gutted. Our eviction notice is for the beginning of May, and whilst I can simply refuse to move its going to be very unpleasant and not at all what I wanted. Made worse by DD16 sitting her exams in May/June - she really doesnt need the disruption. So all my packing is sitting here waiting for some news on what the next move is.

juliettet

mardatha wrote: »

Quote from Juliette - "I too had an IB as a neighbour"...........

:rotfl::rotfl: I will keep reading "irritable bowel" for IB ... :D

I just about ended up with that. He always played the same record when he came in from the dancing. Kenny Rogers Lucielle. The police were on my speed dail and thought this was hilarious.

lostinrates

Pitlanepiglet wrote: »

Funnily enough it's the memory thing that makes me prefer this thread to the Daily thread. I always find that I feel very inadequate in there as it's full of posts with long lists of >>hugs to so and so for whatever<< and I have no recollection of what it relates to at all! It doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with the threads though, just that they are not for me so I don't read them (and thus don't feel quite so inadequate!).

The daily threads are way beyond me, I wouldn't even try!

Let's also not confuse general OS gripes - merging of threads etc with the "it's tough" threads, they are different issues.

Actually to me they are related. When a new user to the site having threads whisked away and being told to use a search function felt unfriendly and a bit disorientating, combined with the very friendly and familiar attitude between long term posters. Now, with retrospect it IS my fault for taking it how I did, but at the time it sent me scuttling away from OS board.

I still find the "tough" threads friendly, I think people do say what they think and that's a good thing. It doesn't mean people have to fall out......

We all have different views and should be able to debate as we would do around a kitchen table - there is no need for flouncing! Take a break for a few days and come back when it's all back in proportion - that was what I did when I had a spat earlier in the year.

Spot on, I agree wholeheartedly!

As for congratulating re babies etc, to me that's part of "it's tough", people are often quite isolated and I think it is appropriate for support to be provided here - it shouldn't become the main part of the thread but I don't think it does currently. I had huge support when I was being bullied at work and I don't know where else I would have got such supportive yet practical and pragmatic comments other than from the OS'ers.

:A

Agree with this too. I just gloss over them, rudely, because its all I can do, but they don't bother me so much. but its the day to day ''isolation'' that these sort of threads replace for me...where would have been interacting with colleagues in the work place etc in the past.

Pitlanepiglet

lostinrates wrote: »

Actually to me they are related. When a new user to the site having threads whisked away and being told to use a search function felt unfriendly and a bit disorientating, combined with the very friendly and familiar attitude between long term posters. Now, with retrospect it IS my fault for taking it how I did, but at the time it sent me scuttling away from OS board.

I do agree with you, I feel that there is much too much merging and combining of threads and it makes people feel unworthy. I got in trouble for suggesting that combining a "gluten free" thread with an ordinary quiche thread wasn't an ideal match for merging together :rotfl:

I think what I mean is that there is nothing that most of the "it's tough" posters can do about the main OS threads it's a moderation issue and shouldn't reflect how people feel about this thread

dollydaydream07

although i don't often post i do enjoy reading this thread and seeing what everyone has been up to - babies, noisy neighbours etc and i do think it's a part of the 'it's tough' notion and like some i just gloss over the bits that i don't want to read - although thats not much, i enjoy reading them, would love to remember to reply to certain posts but my memory is also terrible due to PA, so sometimes do a general 'hugs to all who need them' reply!!!

things are certainly tough here, it was ny nan's birthday last weekend and we were invited to a party for her - told my parents we couldn't afford to go(they live 75 miles away) as every penny we had this onth was spoken for....... so my mum sent us some money down so we decided to use some of it to go to the party and the rest as a bit of treat money so we could do some stuff with DD during the holidays........ well DD had other ideas, she had a big seizure on the saturday morning so i spent all day at the hospital with her, i came home and DH stayed overnight with DD, got in touch with my mum and told her what had happened, offered to give her the money back as we weren't going to the party, she said we could keep it so we have had a bit of extra treat money - took DD to a softplay place and the rest is put to one side and if we decide to use some of it for another trip out then we will, but if not we will be using it to pay off some of the credit card.....

speaking of CC, we finally applied for 0% balance transfer card, got it accepted and have been told what our limit will be and it is more than enough to trasfer all our current balance to - have sat and worked out how much our payments will be to pay it off in the 18 month period, will mean a bit of juggling with some stuff but we can do it!! hopefully we can pay it off a bit sooner and once that's paid off we can start to chuck some extra money to the loan and get that paid off, then the plan is to get some savings and then look to starting to pay off the mortgage early!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D:D


our bl**dy oven door handle has been loose for a while now but it actually bl**dy fell off yesterday :mad: and we can put it back on but everytime we open the oven door it comes off again :mad:............. gonna have a google and see if theres any chance of buying a new handle for it....... which will be TOUGH as i have no idea what the oven is as it's an integrated one and we inherited it when we moved her 5 years ago!!!!!!!!
any idea's anyone???

maryb

I know what you mean about the merged threads, they tend to die - look at Lavandula's thread on simple living and Lilikins both of which got mereged into the older thread.

I think it would be helpful if the thread could be renamed so that it shows the most recent name - after all, that's what people look for when they scan the list of threads. Also some indication of where a new thread has been merged in. That way it would be interesting to read the older entries but the new discussion might maintain its momentum. Just because it has been discussed before doesn't mean that newbies don't have their own journey to make and it's helpful to be able to talk about it in the here and now even if it has all been said before. If that was the criterion we'd none of us have much to say - after all, there's nothing new under the sun!!

mardatha

Pouting now. Not happy. I do so enjoy a good flounce