How to Get Through The Tough Times The Old Style Way.

lostinrates

Hello all.

I had a shock on Sunday night when I had a call telling me to ''collect the students you are hosting tomorrow night at eight''. I was shocked. I had indeed enquired, but taken it no further, deciding it wasn't viable economically here, as we live out of town the petrol getting them in and out, not even counting the timings....just wrong for a small holder really. The woman was furious and said she's left an answer phone message weeks ago. I checked both phones and there wasn't one. Any way I asked her to find somewhere else but there was nowhere so I spent yesterday frantically cleaning (all that good weather saw me almost ignoring the house) and going to pick up the two people staying with me. I'm really cross. No one checked my home or me. I spoke to some of the other people hosting and they are putting two teenagers in a double be in one house, and then some people took 6-8 teens....goodness knows where they put them all. I had a chat with the foreign teachers who told me that the young people are usually not treated like family. I can see why, it really doesn't make finacial sense withwhat they pay if you are paying petrol as well as feeding them, where as if you are taking a whole load it would, but it doesn't make for a great or a safe experience for them I wouldn't have thought.

This morning the organiser was asking if I could do it next time, and telling me if I got hold of camp beds I could put them two or three or so in a room. I pointed out I couldn't get that many in my car safely and she shrugged. Needless to say I won't do it again. I was up at ten to six to do animals before breakfast in time to get them where they needed to be and hadn't got to bed before 11:30 doing washing up from supper. They are keen to help and very nice but they have long days this week too. I feel quite ashamed of the way people seem to be hosting these young people and also I'd be horrified as a parent if I were to have saved to send kids on a holiday to find they'd had to share beds, with strangers whose homes hadn't been checked and who hadn't known they were hosting anyone 24 hours earlier.

BitterAndTwisted

How old are these students and where are they from? I hope they've brought wellington boots with them so they can give you a hand with the outdoors work.

lostinrates

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

How old are these students and where are they from? I hope they've brought wellington boots with them so they can give you a hand with the outdoors work.

Teenagers (some are 14 I think, some are 18 and then the majority inbetween that). There are a handful of adult teachers too....two of those have no English. No boots! Horrified at being in the sticks and furious at the 20 minute drive from the meeting point. And no time to help really...they have a really full schedule (albeit very full of VERY long drives). Only one place they are going is really ''near'' here and there are a lot of places nearer.

On advice from an MSE chum I'm going to poke about the net and see if I can see how these trips are marketed...On the plus side, the two here are charming, very gracious, and great with the cats and dogs...(even when the cats were showing off in the most abysmal way, like spoilt, over tired toddlers, I was v. embarrassed - the dogs are being wonderful) and ate well and enjoyed their supper. They are not a problem at all (I'm somewhat embarrassed as I just would never have taken people atm with our inherited bathroom as it is ''No shower?'' they squeaked) and though the rooms are comfortable the curtains are up in a heath robinson manner and the heating I provided for them is plug in electric heaters). Its just that this is so poorly organised not MSE for me, and potentially I think unpleasant and possibly even unsafe for kids.

And I'm tired and grumpy

grandma247

lostinrates does that mean people are not crb checked? Do kids from abroad not count?

Larumbelle

Aaah lostinrates :grouphug: sounds pretty appalling to be honest. I would definitely find out who is organising/marketing the trip, both in this country and abroad, and complain like mad! I would also be having a word with the local council/social services as it sounds like it borders on neglectful or negligent behaviour on the part of the UK organisers. I am just googling for more info for you I know there were questions in Parliament over this kind of thing.

lostinrates

grandma247 wrote: »

lostinrates does that mean people are not crb checked? Do kids from abroad not count?

I don't know if this is the norm. Mine happen to be of age, or perhaps that's why I was allocated them. I'll try and ask other hosts if there is an oppertunity. All I can say is noone checked me that I know of.

Larumbelle

How long are they due to be staying?

lostinrates

Larumbelle wrote: »

I know there were questions in Parliament over this kind of thing.

That's very helpful thank you! I didn't know that.

I'm sure some of the people do provide lovely stays too, but it really does concern me. I'm not pro crb testing everyone who walks past a house a child might visit, but volunteering with kids under supervision and taking them home to your house seem to be to be very different situations. I wouldn't find a CRB check invasive, I've had them before and offered to have one before babysitting for a friend (whose husband laughed his socks off) because I just feel its not an issue for me so ...

lostinrates

Larumbelle wrote: »

How long are they due to be staying?

Not long...Mon-Thurs. Which means there is so little time to build rappour, they have LONG days too, so its little face to face time.

Larumbelle

Hmmm well all I have found so far is that this was due to come under the vetting and barring scheme, but that's all in the air as the coalition decided to scale it back and I've not found the extent to which it actually became law. If they were minors staying longer it would be classed as private fostering. As they are of age I'm not sure if they'd have been covered by this law anyway.

It's all about balance. I don't agree with CRB-checking everyone on the planet either, but as someone who had some pretty horrific experiences when younger I find it unbelievable that kids could be dumped in a house in a strange country with a host who has not been checked at all. I mean, not even a cursory visit to check that you are who you say you are and that the room actually exists! That surely can't be right! If my kid was placed in that way in a foreign country I would be effing fuming.

Personally I would call social services to check if there is any relevant legislation. If not I would also write to my MP and ask why the heck not.