What would you do....?

ryan86uk

mumx3 wrote: »

Definatly option 1,

As an Ex pat my husband worked abroad from the age of 25, everything he earnt was Tax free, much like yourself, he returned home at 36, brought our current home cash, so never had a morgage, we now live a very comfortable life, so I would stay as long as you can you are still only 24 , it will be well worth it in the long run.
The UK right now is really not a great place to be, your not missing much!
Good luck

Wow!! Your husband was brave!! I could not do that long away from from the UK! Oh god he has done well. You both have. Just as hard for the partner I guess!

gallygirl

LilacPixie wrote: »

No idea what you do but my dad is an engineer and he spend ALOT of time in the middle east/africa when I was little securing our financial future. I am guessing the 86 in your name is year of birth so your 24/25... do another 4 years and you will be clear of your mortgage under 30 and set for life... 30 is not too late to settle actually no age is too late to settle when you meet someone you want to settle with..

If you stay another few years then, as LP says, you will be set up for life. I will then introduce you to my daughter .

Have you actually worked out how much the 20k job would pay per month? And how much your outgoings were? As you couldn't save before on your income it's likely you would be in the same boat - with the added commitment of a house to run. How would you pay for a new boiler etc? You could be in the UK with possibilty of a social life but no money to have one, and live hand to mouth indefinitely. Or knuckle down for a few years and then be able to take a 20k job and have lots of disposable income (till my daughter wants children :rotfl:).

When you come home give yourself a reality check. Get up at 5am, walk to a bus stop and have a 1/2 hour bus journey, in the dark and rain. Try to do food shopping on £20 a week. Suddenly the sunshine may not seem too bad.

Good luck.

ryan86uk

gallygirl wrote: »

If you stay another few years then, as LP says, you will be set up for life. I will then introduce you to my daughter .

Have you actually worked out how much the 20k job would pay per month? And how much your outgoings were? As you couldn't save before on your income it's likely you would be in the same boat - with the added commitment of a house to run. How would you pay for a new boiler etc? You could be in the UK with possibilty of a social life but no money to have one, and live hand to mouth indefinitely. Or knuckle down for a few years and then be able to take a 20k job and have lots of disposable income (till my daughter wants children :rotfl:).

When you come home give yourself a reality check. Get up at 5am, walk to a bus stop and have a 1/2 hour bus journey, in the dark and rain. Try to do food shopping on £20 a week. Suddenly the sunshine may not seem too bad.

Good luck.

More importantly, how old is your daughter? :beer: Maybe i should have a trail run with her?

Yeh, I understand your points. When i was in the UK before I had a really low paid job (14k pa). On 20k i would take home around £1300 a month. My outgoings would be around £750 per month. Which isn't too bad, is it?

Plus if I rented a room out that would add some extra cash to the equation?

lincoln-potter

ryan86uk wrote: »

More importantly, how old is your daughter? :beer: Maybe i should have a trail run with her?

Yeh, I understand your points. When i was in the UK before I had a really low paid job (14k pa). On 20k i would take home around £1300 a month. My outgoings would be around £750 per month. Which isn't too bad, is it?

Plus if I rented a room out that would add some extra cash to the equation?

How much longer do you think you could last out there if you really tried?

nell53

I think if you found a nice girlfriend out there, you'd be much happier to stay. You have made a fantastic start in life and will look back when you're older and be proud that you did it.

I lived and worked abroad for a year when I was your age and it was far more pleasurable in hindsight that it was at the time- not that I admitted it to anyone, but then there were no anonymous forums then.

I know given the culture it's difficult to meet someone, but I'm sure there must be loads of ex-pats with eligible daughters - unless gallygirl's DD fits the bill.

ryan86uk

nell53 wrote: »

I think if you found a nice girlfriend out there, you'd be much happier to stay. You have made a fantastic start in life and will look back when you're older and be proud that you did it.

I lived and worked abroad for a year when I was your age and it was far more pleasurable in hindsight that it was at the time- not that I admitted it to anyone, but then there were no anonymous forums then.

I know given the culture it's difficult to meet someone, but I'm sure there must be loads of ex-pats with eligible daughters - unless gallygirl's DD fits the bill.

I'm flying back to the UK tonight so i'm gonna have a long hard think about things when I get back. I've got this job interview so i'm keeping my options open at the minute.

Everyone I have spoke to about coming back has different opinions. Some say you are a young lad, you have your own place go back home and enjoy yaself. Some say stay here and earn some more money.

There are so many pros and cons i just can't decided in my head what to do!!! It really is doing my bloody head in.

My objective of coming out here was to get my own place. Which I have obviously achieved. Where does the line stop though? It's never ending there are always more goals to aim for. :mad:

MilneBay

Hi Ryan

It sounds like you are struggling now your target for being there has been removed? Perhaps you would find it easier if you set yourself a new target and a time limit?
It is great that you have the house but even another 12 months out there would make a huge difference. Why not aim to overpay the mortgage by a certain amount and save another. That way when you do come back you have a cushion and wouldn't end up in dire straits if you lost your job, couldn't find one, hated the one you did find etc, etc.

Does sound like you have a fantastic deal but money doesn't buy happiness. On the other hand, you could be stuck in the UK unable to go out with your friends because you can't afford it. If you do want to settle down, best to get this out of the way now while it is just you to worry about.

I'd be tempted to stick it out for at least another six months to a year and then review it. MB

Danni-R

Hello,

I'm not in your position nor am I ever likely to be so what I say might not really count for much! . Another 2 years will half your mortgage. you'll still be young and can settle down. The current UK market is a bit pants and 2 weeks off for every 8 weeks worked is pretty good. When I was at Uni most people didnt see their OHs that often for that long.

It really is going to be a case of you looking at the numbers. Yes you could get a lodger but with all the woo-ing you want to do will that be an option. I think you've got a fantastic chance here which if played to your advantage could really set you up for life and let you enjoy the benefits when you do settle down.

If you only hold out another year and you're mortgage will be down to 65k. thats a great amount to work with so when you come home you'll have more disposable income. Even if you rent out your house whilst you're not in it and add to that.

Basically, my vote is stay there.

BFM

i was in the us for 6 years (i went out there with my wife so a little different from your set up) and now have quite a lot of regrets about coming back to the uk for a variety of reasons.

that said, the first couple years were very difficult for my wife as she struggled to make a new set of friends so i hear your pain from that perspective.

agree with much of the sentiment of stick it out for another year or two as being able to crack off £20k or so a year off your mortgage will improve your quality of life so much when you are set to settle down / have kids etc.

just a couple of thoughts as to making yourself happier over there outside of work, a circle of mates is hugely important.

the single thing i did that made our life in the states soooo much improved was to join a sociable football team. met a ton of really good folks, locals and ex pats - the exercise and the camaraderie was massive and my wife becoming friendly with the wags made our lives so much more enriched - if you aren't into footy (or another sport) then get stuck into whatever you are interested in, or do an evening course or something where you can begin to meet a circle of new mates, if you have that support network staying becomes a decsion your heart and head can both get behind.


next time you were set to go home, can you not see if you can get a mate to come visit you instead - i always find it much easier to go out and meet people a lot easier with a mate compared to being on your tod.

good luck in whatever you do, but give it a real shot as you don't want to look back and regret not giving it a fair go.

gallygirl

ryan86uk wrote: »

More importantly, how old is your daughter? :beer: Maybe i should have a trail run with her?

Yeh, I understand your points. When i was in the UK before I had a really low paid job (14k pa). On 20k i would take home around £1300 a month. My outgoings would be around £750 per month. Which isn't too bad, is it?

Plus if I rented a room out that would add some extra cash to the equation?

You're too poor - come back when you're richer :rotfl:.

£550 a month is not a lot to live on - covering the basics - and have a life with being able to go out, save for holidays etc, plus putting money aside for the house.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I hope it rains every day you are back :rotfl: