Buying Presents & Pretending They Are From Family

littlelibrarylass

Acc72 wrote:

My problem is the opposite !! .....

Due to a fall-out with my sister I never / rarely see my nephew (age 8) or neice (age 3).

We buy them lots of Christmas and Birthday presents but never even receive an acknowledgment / thanks.

Earlier this year I received a birthday card from my nephew and neice (not my sister), but earlier this week it was girlfreinds (of 8 years) birthday and we were both upset that she didn't receive a card.

(ps - when I say WE buy presents - in reality it is actually my girlfreind who chooses and buys the presents).

We haver already bought presents for this year - but it is getting difficult as I am afraid we do not really know what they like / dislike or even what size clothes to buy.

We were thinking after this year to send cards and vouchers - is this mean ?

The last thing I want to do is something that will upset the children or make them think we don't care.

On the other hand we don't want to keep buying presents that they may not want.

Any advice ?? ......

i am in a similar postion to you , my sister stopped talking to me 3 years ago, she doesn't send cards or presents to my daughter and son and doesn't let us see her daughters. however i have a good relationship with my nieces father, my sisters ex husand ,so we do see the girls from time to time.
we stopped sending presents to my nieces at their home address as we were never sure they got them and now send them to my ex brother in laws. Last year we sent vouchers as the cost of posting the presents got a bit too much and like you we were not sure what they really liked .
I'm sure the 8 year old at least wouldlike to have a voucher and go and spend it- ours certainly does

LLL

super41

karren wrote:

Glad I'm not the only one who makes the childrentdo cards etc to say thank you, but have to say not many other frieinds bother these days, and as for spending a lot on a wedding present etc and not getting even a thank you, or am i the strange one?

No you're not, I insist on it! I always thank people for things and I'll expect my children to do the same. My DD is 5 so in reality I write the thankyous and she just signs her name. But it's the principle. After her birthday I took the thankyou notes to school for her to hand out - one parent was really surprised as if she'd never had one before and another said wasn't I good to get them done as if it was something special. I think if you start things like manners early with a bit of luck they'll stick. It also surprises me how many adults don't say thank you. I know people have busy lives but a quick verbal thankyou would be fine!