when she grows up - learning difficulties

peachyprice

gingerwhinger wrote: »

This is so true. My DD actually has a twin brother who doesn't have learning difficulties. .

sock-knitter wrote: »

i have twin boys who are now aged 15, who have learning difficulties, and ADHD, and aspergers,

anyone any tips on helping 15 year olds with money, my biggest fear is that some one will rip them off

My boys are twins too :j

lizziebabe

gingerwhinger wrote: »

My daughter is now aged 10 and also has dyslexia, dyspraxia and discalculia.

We were fortunate in that she had a really good teacher in reception who picked up on the dyslexia and dyspraxia pretty much straight away. However, nothing really happened until we got the formal diagnosis.

Reception she made very little progress. Year 1 she had a truly incompetent teacher and made no progress at all and really suffered with her self esteem. At the end of year 1 (when she was 6 1/2) we managed to get her formally assessed by paying privately. Things started to improve for her at this point.

In year 2 she got more support from school and we started to pay for her to see a dyslexia teacher for an hour a week. We were given exercises to do at home to help with the dyspraxia and also we read together and did the "toe by toe" book.

In year 3 she was also diagnosed with discalculia. Her maths skills were really really poor so this was no surprise at all. She was in the bottom set (set 5) and really struggled with even simple tasks like say counting backwards from 100. She also could not associate numbers with objects.

In Year 4 things really started improving for her. She got a new maths teacher at school who was fab and really seemed to get through to her. She made so much progress that we paid her privately to give her an extra hour per week at home. This along with the personal dyslexia tutor really made a difference. At the end of year 4 her maths test results put her in Set 2 which was amazing. her reading and spelling results were above average. She still struggles with writing and her last years results put her about 2 years behind average.

Yesterday I got a phone call from her teacher to say how proud she was of DD. She said she had worked so hard on her writing objectives and was coming on leaps and bounds and also that she was a really popular and confident member of the class - which was obviously wonderful.

What I would advise anyone in a similar situation is to pay for personal tuition and do whatever you can at home to try and help. My daughters school is classed as outstanding by ofsted and is supposedly one of the top 100 schools in the country - but they only have so much resource. They have given her 3 extra half hour sessions for the past 3 years but it really isn't enough on its own.

I used to always worry that my daughter would never be able to attend uni and would end up doing a job she hated but now I honestly think if she wants to go to uni then she will be able. She does sometimes say she wants to be a doctor or a vet and I do personally think that would be unobtainable but I still try and encourage her as she's already totally exceeded everyone's expectations once so she may well do it again!

I know it's really worrying but try and stay positive. There are loads of famous people who struggled at school but managed to do well in adult life. (Richard Branson and Winston Churchill both had dyslexia)

This sounds very like my own lovely daughter. She was 7 when we had her tested privately.I realised that she had problems as I had seen similar with my sister, and DD is left handed too!

She is so bright, especially socially and school didn't think that there was a real problem as she was always answering questions in class etc. She has dyslexia, but more dyscalculia. However, following the results the school did give her extra help and we paid for a personal tutor to help her at home. She came on leaps and bounds. After Primary school we were able to pay for to have private education in schools that offered extra help, and with her previous help she did very well. She got 3 very good A levels and went to Uni (Royal Holloway Uni of London) and got a 2:1. When she was younger I read a lot with her and later I encouraged her to read anything (even trashystuff) just so that she would read. Now she is an avid reader, but admits she is slow as she has to read every word etc. I am so proud of her achievements but she has got the right personality and social skills to be confident in anything she does.

I have always encouraged her and helped proofread her work, at school and at Uni - not changing it but discussing it with her for her to change.

She is now 23 and working as a trainee assistant manager in the restaurant trade, and doing very well. She has got over her fears of dealing with money and is very good at dealing with difficult situations and customers.

Good Luck - but I agree with the above poster that try to get extra help if you can afford it. And offer much love and encouragement.

Mojisola

Torndao01 wrote: »

Hi I have a DD aged 8 year 3 at school. She is a wonderful, kind, loving and happy child. She also has dyslexia, dyspraxia and general academic learning dificulties. Her reading age is 5, she also struggles with numbers past 40 and struggles to write readable words. She does not have problems socially and has the ability to mix with her peers. The school are good and she gets lots of extra lessons so thats not a problem.

I worry how she is going to function in the real world when she gets older and how she is going to cope at high school. DD still has to learn about money, time, days the week, how to turn on the dvd player and many more day to day things. The fact that in other ways she is keeping up with her peers and her difficulties do not stand out means other people do not really take my concerns serious.

Has anyone gone through this with their child and how has the child coped with growing up. I suppose Im looking for reassurance that she will be ok, which I know is impossible.

In addition to doing all you can to support her now, it would be worth making sure you have wills that protect her future. Talk to a solicitor about putting her inheritance into a trust so that others care for her money.

If she improves to the point of being capable to manage her finances by herself, you can change the will to allow her to inherit as usual.

gorgeouslatinrose

I have suffered dyspraxia, dyscalcula and dyslexia for most of my life. I was diagnosed very late at the age of 18, and though I have struggled with a lot of things, this is mainly due to late diagnosis. If you are diagnosed early , I believe there is a lot of support available and many people cope just fine. I am now about to graduate from university and hopefully learn to drive soon - it may not be as easy as for those without learning difficulties but you do get there, and there is a lot of support about so I am sure everything will be okay

Soundgirlrocks

Hi I'm dyslexic and so is my other half, we both have full time job in sound engineering and a large proportion of our friends at work have what would be classed as learning difficulties, (these guys can build circuit boards from scratch, calculate frequency intermodulation and build computer programs by the way) some of our greats minds have dyslexia ( Albert Eintiestien, Roald Darhl for example) I hate the term learning difficulties or worst disabilities. I have always believed that we just learn in a different way to the majority or as my OH says most people have a PC brain and we are more like Macs they do a similar job but one is more creative than the other !
I'm sure your daughter will be fine you need to encourage and support her. She will find her own work arounds. There is loads of support and advice make use of it. There are tons of jobs where a very basic ability to read and write are all that is needed, and where her other skills will shine. The most important thing is that she try’s her hardest, and doesn’t get discouraged. My other half was made to feel he was dumb and therefore stopped trying even at the things he was good at, it has take a long time to undo the damage.

I wouldn't, if offered take a pill to get rid of my dyslexia it means I think about things in a different way, and makes me more resourceful!

Molly41

My DD is severely dyslexic and also had lots of social problems in her early teenage years.

Once diagnosed (which took ages) and with appropriate help at home and school she is now doing well. She went to college and was well supported with a reader and scribe to do her AS levels and is currently preparing for her A levels. Her Reader and scribe make all the difference. She is really creative and now has really strong friendships and is good socially. She has empathy - your DD is doing so well just to get on with her peers and that will stand her in good stead.

I support my DD with her organisation as this is an area that she needs lots of help with. I remember worrying about my DD but if I look back I would say take a day at a time. You can spend hours endlessly worrying for it to come to nothing. Rejoice in her abilities not wallow in her disabilities x

gingerwhinger

Soundgirlrocks wrote: »

Hi I'm dyslexic and so is my other half, we both have full time job in sound engineering and a large proportion of our friends at work have what would be classed as learning difficulties, (these guys can build circuit boards from scratch, calculate frequency intermodulation and build computer programs by the way) some of our greats minds have dyslexia ( Albert Eintiestien, Roald Darhl for example) I hate the term learning difficulties or worst disabilities. I have always believed that we just learn in a different way to the majority or as my OH says most people have a PC brain and we are more like Macs they do a similar job but one is more creative than the other !
I'm sure your daughter will be fine you need to encourage and support her. She will find her own work arounds. There is loads of support and advice make use of it. There are tons of jobs where a very basic ability to read and write are all that is needed, and where her other skills will shine. The most important thing is that she try’s her hardest, and doesn’t get discouraged. My other half was made to feel he was dumb and therefore stopped trying even at the things he was good at, it has take a long time to undo the damage.

I wouldn't, if offered take a pill to get rid of my dyslexia it means I think about things in a different way, and makes me more resourceful!

You've put into words exactly how I feel. My daughter inherited the dyslexia etc from her father and whilst I did much better than him at school he as an adult has totally run rings round me! He is unbelievable at problem solving as dyslexic people have to use the whole of their brain - as opposed to just their left or right side. He is incredibly creative to the point he has invented and patented several products that have become industry standards. He started and successfully ran 2 businesses and now has a fantastic job with a blue chip company.

I remember my daughter's dyslexia teacher lending me a book called "the gift of dyslexia" and at the time I really didn't think she had a gift at all - more like a hindrance. But now, nearly 4 years later I can see everything is coming together for her, and I do actually think it is a gift.

concerned43

My 12 year old was in the same boat and at the age of 10 I was told he was so behind his peers he would not be able to attend main stream senior school!
I moved him to a school 30 miles away (we all moved) and since then he has not only reached the same level as his peers but exceeds some of them. His teacher has also needed his help teaching the class on two subjects - religion and history as my DS has a great head for information/dates etc. He starts main stream senior school this year and he wants to go to Cambridge to study physics!
Only goes to show what a good school can achieve.
My advice is not to worry about the future as your DS's condition could change over the coming years.

KiKi

Hi OP

I don't have direct experience of this, but I have seen a couple of kids in my church with learning difficulties struggle at an early age but really blossom as they've gotten older. She may be learning slowly now and not quite at the level of her peers, but that won't necessarily be the rate of her learning forever. You don't know what she'll pick up in a year's time!

The fact that she's able to socialise, make friends and get on with people is a MASSIVE plus for her. Without her difficulties, she wouldn't be the same person, she wouldn't be your daughter.

Don't imagine a bleak outlook for her; help her to imagine how wonderful her life is going to be.

KiKi

Deeperblue

Although all children and levels of learning difficulty are different, I have dyslexia and had the reading age of an 8 year old when I was 12 and I do fine! I had some extra lessons when I was younger which helped a lot and extra time in exams and I went to university and have a great professional job.

Although I can't guarantee your little one will be fine I can say that a lot of us with LD's are