Extremely lonely....

hayleyholly

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Hi Hayley,

I know how your feeling love, I'm a little older than you and never found it easy to make friends most of my life. I was teased at school for loads of things really it wasn't an easy time for me, I've never had any proper friends all the people who I thought were my friends used me for one thing or another then stop speaking to me. I don't think I've done anything wrong to make them stop talking to me but somehow they do.

I did go to college for a year then changed colleges I made friends in the first college which I sometimes talk to on facebook but thats about it the second college I went to was where I had a few friends from school which I don't really speak to anymore most of them have a couple of kids and I don't so we don't see eachother that much.

Then I work from home so the only people I see during the week is my family and I see my H2B at the weekend as he works nights. So I'm stuck in all week really.

I did start entering competitions and even joined a club doing it but it was full of people over 50 I went for a few months but then stopped going as they were already good mates and I felt like an imposter. I do still enter competitions though.

I think you might need someone to talk to and tell people how you feel.

Sending you hugs

Steph xx

Haha, I am ADDICTED to competitions, it's like Pringles, once you pop you can't stop ;o)

I spoke to my parents about how I am feeling last night, they ahve said they will start taking me out driving, and put me through my test etc, so I may be more mobile then. They also have advised me not to go to the docs about depression, and to try St John's Wort instead (this is like a herbal anti-depressant). I think my mum ahs advised me against this incase they put me on tabs, as she was put on tabs when her sister died, and as far as I am aware they caused problems.

So sorry to hear that you were teased at school, I know how you feel, the same thing happened to me, but in the last year at school. And then into the second year of college. Kids can be so cruel, but all the people who used to 'pick' on me, have now apologised (although I did tell them where to shove it ) Haha.

I hope you are well, and if you ever fancy a chat, PM me )

Hayley xxx

Kittikins

hayleyholly - sweetheart, whilst your parents are trying their very best to help you, please don't cancel your doctor's appointment, I have been feeling very low and panicky for a long time and like you, pushed people away, I could see that I was depressed, but couldn't muster up the courage or energy to do anything about it.

There is a vast array of medication you can be prescribed, and your doctor will hopefully either talk with you about medication and/or suggest therapy. I'm doing both now and it's really helping. Having someone completely removed from the situation (i.e. an impartial GP/psychologist) who is there to listen to ME without me feeling like I should hold anything back, and who doesn't judge me in anyway, is wonderful.

Good luck with it, and keep posting xx

Counting_Pennies_2

I agree please don't cancel going to the doctors.

Tablets are only one answer, there are so many other answers.

You need to be strong, keep that appointment and see the doctor. Say you are keen to avoid tablets and go for the other remedies. Counselling can be referred via your GP. Do also try Cranial Osteopathy, it is very relaxing, and helps me stablise my emotions. It does cost, but for me it is worth sacrificing other things to get my mind in check.

When a mother loses a child the grief is so great that doctors will often advise on tablets to see them through the initial period. But again it doesn't work for everyone (didn't in my family either).

In the grips of the worst PND I could imagine I insisted I didn't want tablets and they worked with me to ensure my wishes were listened to, and I explored other options.

podperson

I think it's great that you managed to talk to your parents about this and that they are being supportive but agree with the others that you shouldn't cancel your doctors appointment. Different things work for different people - your gp should be able to suggest various options, not just pills, and I wouldn't necessarily even rule tablets out completely, some people find them helpful and some people (like your mum) find they either don't do anything or they don't agree with them. I don't think they are necessarily the best thing as a long term solution but to help you get through on a short term basis until you can put some more long term solutions into place then they can be useful.

money_honey

Please do go to the doctors. I can relate to what you're going through in a small way - I've had periods of feeling lonely and low most of my life (too-strict parents and bullying at school). A few years ago I had a very hard time at work with a boss who was constantly belittling me and making horrible comments, and on top of that I had to deal with very high workloads. I got really depressed and felt upset all the time and lonely. The first doctor I saw more or less brushed it off (he just signed me off work for a week) but then I made an appointment with a different female doctor and she was really helpful, prescribed me some tablets and said if they didn't work we could try different ones and that there were alternative remedies I could pay for myself if I wanted her to give me any information. Anyway I ended up taking some tablets and a few months later my boss left, so it more or less ended then. I still do have periods of feeling really low and lonely, (which as I said before I've had most of my life), but I recognise that they're only temporary and things aren't as bad as I'm making them out to be. I can be so irrational! I often take things the wrong way... anyway I'm going off on a tangent here - but the point is - you aren't alone!

Hope you get the help you need. I find writing it down how I feel really helps, especially if I feel I can't talk to anyone about it. Also you can email the Samaritans if you don't want to talk to anyone, they give great advice and can give you other contacts http://www.samaritans.org/talk_to_someone/email.aspx xx

dazzer68

hi hayley, just wanted to see how things were going? hopefully you didnt cancel the docs appointment, you ought to go,if not for any medication then just a chat and to make aware how you feel to the doctors and they can monitor and help in the future. hope alls ok

Stephb1986_2

Hey Hayley, How are you love? Just thought I'd drop by and see how you are?

I hope your keeping well

Hugs

Steph xx