Real life MMD: Too late to claim for wedding cheque?

beemuzed

Oh dear! It's gone, the moment is past. Write it down to experience and make sure you keep better tabs on your money in future.

elizabethhull

Please say you wrote and thanked them at the time. If not, you don't deserve such generous friends. 'Lost' cheques are a fact of life. I couldn't find the cheque my Aunt gave me to buy my father's funeral flowers. I found it a year later in a Tupperware container (she'd borrowed it & thought this was a 'safe' place in which to put the cheque for me). Did I ask for another ? Absolutely NOT !! In fact, when she asked me later that year if she'd given me the money because she couldn't find it in her statement, I said she must have done (lying through my teeth) but it was so long ago that I couldn't remember exactly when I'd cashed it. So that's what to do if the givers ask you about it. As for your so-called problem, don't even think of asking for another cheque. You've managed without it and you still have the warm feeling that they valued you enough to give such a large present
(I'm still puzzled by people who don't keep track of £200 - isn't that a lot of money to most people?)

Mummyoftwo_2

Forget the money. Remember your friend's generosity. I have a rule that I never, ever cause my friends any conflict/rows/upset over money, it just isn't worth it. By asking for a new cheque you would be causing embarrassment and upset from your friend. To be honest she probably forgot that you hadn's cashed the cheque. Leave it, let it go. If you are still unsure think about the worst case scenario: you could end up having a fall out with your friend and losing her friendship. Is it worth it for £200? It might be annoying in the here an now to lose £200 but in the long run, what's more important? If I was in your friend's shoes, I'd be pretty hacked off if I was asked to issue a new cheque 2 years down the line. And, think about your friend's financial circumstances, we're in the middle of a recession and what might she might have been able to afford a couple of years ago may not be relevant now.

_nate

I think you should request the money. Obviously, the matter should be handled with discretion at first, but if the giver refuses to co-operate then there is always the Small Claims Court.

HeadAboveWater

_nate wrote: »

I think you should request the money. Obviously, the matter should be handled with discretion at first, but if the giver refuses to co-operate then there is always the Small Claims Court.

are you mad in the head?! this is a friendship here, not a business.

time has long since passed. forget about it and move on. you'd have been none the wiser had you never found the cheque. would you still be contemplating asking for a replacement cheque??

Casanova

Let it go - it would be rude to ask for a new cheque.

Katie-Kat-Kins

elizabethhull wrote: »

Please say you wrote and thanked them at the time. If not, you don't deserve such generous friends. 'Lost' cheques are a fact of life. I couldn't find the cheque my Aunt gave me to buy my father's funeral flowers. I found it a year later in a Tupperware container (she'd borrowed it & thought this was a 'safe' place in which to put the cheque for me). Did I ask for another ? Absolutely NOT !! In fact, when she asked me later that year if she'd given me the money because she couldn't find it in her statement, I said she must have done (lying through my teeth) but it was so long ago that I couldn't remember exactly when I'd cashed it. So that's what to do if the givers ask you about it. As for your so-called problem, don't even think of asking for another cheque. You've managed without it and you still have the warm feeling that they valued you enough to give such a large present
(I'm still puzzled by people who don't keep track of £200 - isn't that a lot of money to most people?)

I think I would have fessed up in your situation and said, "yes you gave me a cheque but like a fool I misplaced it so that is why you can't find it on my statement. I'm such an idiot, but so long has passed you shouldn't worry about it". I think not accepting their money just makes you look ungrateful.

Syx

Two options.

1) Try and cash it. I wouldn't, but if you need the cash then it can't hurt.
The person did offer the money to you as a gift, after all.

2) Ignore it. Rip up the cheque. Send the gifter a thank you, explain the situation and make it clear that you appreciate their generosity but under no circumstance are you expecting them to write you another.
Something like "Hi x, found your cheque after all these years and although I'm not going to cash it (in fact I've shredded it) I'd just like to say thanks for the generosity" but phrased a little more eloquently!

snagglepuss

_nate wrote: »

I think you should request the money. Obviously, the matter should be handled with discretion at first, but if the giver refuses to co-operate then there is always the Small Claims Court.

omg what a nerve! Small claims! .. you have to be joking! First of all you would be laughed out of court and secondly you would have to be a real t*sser to pull a stunt like that!
If people can 'forget' about £200 then they really must not need the money in the first place!

Pee

I don't think you ought to do this, but are you sure the cheque has expired? Some cheques state that they are only valid for six months, but some are valid longer.

I would say just forget it, but if they ever bring the subject up - unlikely now - tell the truth.