startagain, Starts Again....... Again

chevalier

£22 for a lightbulb. YOu have to wonder where the heck is the common sense of the person doing the ordering?! I mean seriously!

I too would be interested in the link to the CBT online course to copperjar

aesop thanks for the comment about my signature. It is shamelessly copied from another DFWer though!
chev

startagain_2

Morning everyone,

You have all been posting again and I wasn't even around to pass round the tea and biscuits. How very inconsiderate of me

OK - here we go...

Aesop, well done on helping your friend with the pushchair. When I am a bit more flush I will be in touch to donate something.

copperjar, you have enough on your plate right now. Make sure you have a relaxing weekend. I will catch up on your diary later.

fables - welcome. You are in the wrong place if you think that anyone will go hard on you for being a newbie poster. This is a good place and nobody tells anyone off here - well, not usually anyway Stick around and thanks for the lovely gesture for Aesop. very sweet.

frugal - I am not as calm as it may appear, but what I have learnt is that I need to be "in control" of my life. I can't really handle the unexpected, in fact I fear it, especially bad news or something I don't want to know. Because of that I make lists and try and be ultra organised so that eventualities are covered. It works for me.
CBT is good and if it is done properly you don't even realise that it is being practised. I have a very good book entitled Overcoming Depression and Low Mood which my psychologist recommended and it is very,very good. Look it up on Amazon - written by Chris Williams. If you wan't to borrow it, PM me. You are right in saying that BR changes you. It came at a time in my life when I just didn't know where to turn, I felt I had reached the absolute bottom (again) - thank God for MSE and the advice and support I got.
It was like someone had cleaned the blackboard and I could start afresh, and that it exactly what i have done. I have downsized everything - if you haven't got it, you can't lose it was my theory.
I will never again go into debt and will remain frugal without being a martyr.

I have done a few surveys this morning including a really interesting one on the banks which is going to be for 7 days and includes texts and photos. It is well paid so that is a nice little brucie bonus to kick the weekend off. Paypal have at last completed the deposit for my money (7days!!!) and so I have promptly sent it straight back to my bank again. I need it to pay the "blind" man on Friday.

A chilly day here - MrT has tried to leave home again - he took a real shine to the postlady who came to the door this morning and was all for going with her in her little red van off into the sunset like Postman Pat and Jess :rotfl: He was very upset when she declined his offer and shut the gate on him, he is asleep in his bed with his back to me now. I will cheer him up with a duck feeding walk shortly.

I hope everyone is well and has some nice things planned for this weekend.

Speak soon

SA

savingwannabe

Oh SA, you are so lovely and cheerful. I have soooo much to do. I meet steve and andy tomorrow and they are staying over, i have to tidy housey! and then i go to see Carmen this afternoon.

I had CBT for a whole year. It was completely beyond me but it helped. I am no longer suicidal and try not to internalise stuff now. I have a book which i have lent out too, sorry. It helped make me assertive. (I know i am still a doormat but i am a better doormat than i was).

Ps Mr T must be the happiest dog in the country.

copperjar

Hi guys. The link is http://llttf.com
Chris Williams is actually the author of the site.

afrugalbrunette

I definitely identify with the control thing. That's what my anxietyis about, things that I cannot control, accident, what if, how will I /we cope, scared of having to have to deal with something negative) All came about since my panic attack a little while after BR and repossession, although to be fair it has always been there, just now I feel it's beginning to control me and preventing me from getting on with life. It's a real struggle mentally to not worry about what fate has in store.

I'm off to check out llttf and research Chris Williams' book.

I really do appreciate it. Thank you

(and savingwannabe.. you're totally different from when we first knew each other last year. I see you making decisions all the time now. If it's not good for you, you hold off and do it when you feel you can or want too )

startagain_2

Thanks copperjar - I should have mentioned that - it is a good site, I agree. I like his 5 areas approach to getting through depression. Works for me.

sw - you are not a doormat, don't think that. you are sweet, kind and genuine - 3 qualities that are very sadly lacking in a lot of people these days. MrT would probably disagree with you. He keeps the RSPCA number firmly posted by his bed in case the live in housekeeper doesn't attend to his every need quick enough
Enjoy your weekend, hun.

frugal - the control thing is something that you learn to take control of, strangely enough. You start by only taking ownership of what are actually your own problems and not everyone elses! I am guilty of that, big time. Even feeling to blame for things is a symptom of that. You have to learn to break the cycle, which you do by recognising the "triggers" - feelings, moods, even things that you may say or hear can set it off and giving yourself something else to do to take your mind off it.
In my own case, alcohol is a problem. It has a bad effect on me and can make me morose and needy, so I knocked it on the head, for now. I haven't had a drink since September last year and am MUCH more level headed, and calm, I suppose.

Life is for enjoying - on our terms and the way WE want to enjoy it - not how other people think or say.

Hugs

SA

savingwannabe

What a star you are. you will attract everyone from mse over here !!! A bit like firewalker we need good spirits to keep us all going. Some housework done, some will be done when i return. Have a good day and thank you, you always teach me something SA.

startagain_2

I am not worthy, seriously, sw. I am probably a case of "do as I say and not as I do" I have learned it all over the years but only too often do the exact opposite

I am very pleased to report that my MrS evoucher has worked and I have managed to knock £10 off the delivery due on Tuesday.

The local duck family are now fed and happy. MrT is just getting over the postlady's rebuttal of his misplaced affections this morning.
I am freeezing cold and may have to crank the heating up a bit. Apart from that all is well. I think I am going to sign off until tomorrow by which time my diary will probably have gone on in my absence. Help yourselves to anything in the fridge.....
Hasta manana...
Hugs
SA

afrugalbrunette

startagain wrote: »

I am not worthy, seriously, sw. I am probably a case of "do as I say and not as I do" I have learned it all over the years but only too often do the exact opposite

I am very pleased to report that my MrS evoucher has worked and I have managed to knock £10 off the delivery due on Tuesday.

The local duck family are now fed and happy. MrT is just getting over the postlady's rebuttal of his misplaced affections this morning.
I am freeezing cold and may have to crank the heating up a bit. Apart from that all is well. I think I am going to sign off until tomorrow by which time my diary will probably have gone on in my absence. Help yourselves to anything in the fridge.....
Hasta manana...
Hugs
SA

:eek: I'm shushed :rotfl: See you tomorrow

Aesop

I'll wait for you to be back on line to natter, promise