'Be Happy'...Milly's mission for 2011

pixiechick99

So, rant over:D

I've had a nice day though...until he appeared. Luckily girls don't seem bothered, eldest just laughs, but it can't be nice.

I've spent most of the day sitting in the garden with my book - I meant to read a study book but my novel is so good I can't put it down. In between reading I have cleaned the bathroom, hoovered upstairs and down the stairs, put stuff up the attic and brought down my summer cropped trousers/jeans and vests. Also had a little clear out of the shed - tidied it up a bit so I can get the lawnmower out. My mum's coming on Fri to help do the garden - she loves it:rotfl:

So, house all pretty tidy now, which is a good feeling. I have 3 bags of jumble to be collected on Tuesday, rubbish and recycling all out and dinner in the oven.

I made a pile of the books to go through for my next assignment - have 6 of them on reading+phonics...arghh, where to start?!?! Might go and see my tutor tomorrow morning, it keeps me focused when I see her so might be a good idea.

Off back to my book:beer:

pixiechick99

Ooops I didn't wake up til 9 this morning:eek:
So, no trip to college as by the time I'd showered and washed my hair, I had to take dd2 out to meet friends, nipped to co-op for a few bits it was a bit late as tutor only in this morning. I did email her and ask to go in tomorrow but she's now not working then until after Easter. That's fine - I know what I need to be cracking on with anyway.

I got 66% for my last of the Y1 assignments which was good, considering I just banged the tasks out one weekend...not much planning went into them. If I can keep up the marks in the 60s, that's 2:1 level...so that'd be fine;)

Spent £12 on the bits of shopping, including strawberries to £1, part baked rolls on 2 for 1 and bags of animal biccies 2 for £2. Popped into my friend over the road for a cuppa and now need to do something useful. dd1 wants her hair dyed by me....if she gets out of bed I might do it...lazy moo:o

pixiechick99

Good evening:D
I've had a lovely, quiet day in the sun:)
Had my B12 injection at 9, so was up and ready nice and early. Took girls to meet my niece and her Dad and he took them to a big fair...they're only just back and have had a lovely day.

I gave him £20 as the tickets were £12 each, he wouldn't take any money for food and drinks, so was cheaper than I'd expected. I nipped to Argos on my way home and bought my new hairdryer - was £15 from £22...mine is on its way out - it's blowing out barely warm air even on the hot setting. but it is about 6 years old so can't moan. So, that's all I've spent today;)

I have sat in the garden and read Uni books - but still not much clearer on what I'll be writing in my essay - will keep reading and hope ideas come to me:p

I have my niece here now until the weekend, so it keeps my 2 amused. We'll go to the cinema tomorrow, Orange 2 for 1 and have Mcd's for dinner on the way back. On Thurs I think girls are planning on meeting up with eldest's friends so that'll get them out.

I have a food intolerance test on thurs - not sure if I've mentioned it. Got it for £24 from £60 through Groupon, so at that price I thought it worth giving a go. I am sure that certain food/drink affects my delicate insides:rotfl: So, I'm looking forward to that.

Right, dinner nearly done - must come on and post my meal plans...been slacking with that a bit:o

vasseur

pixiechick99 wrote: »

Good evening:D
I've had a lovely, quiet day in the sun:) It's been lovely today. I have caught the sun!
Had my B12 injection at 9, so was up and ready nice and early. Took girls to meet my niece and her Dad and he took them to a big fair...they're only just back and have had a lovely day.

I gave him £20 as the tickets were £12 each, he wouldn't take any money for food and drinks, so was cheaper than I'd expected. Your ex should take some lesson from him

I nipped to Argos on my way home and bought my new hairdryer - was £15 from £22...mine is on its way out - it's blowing out barely warm air even on the hot setting. but it is about 6 years old so can't moan. So, that's all I've spent today;)

I have sat in the garden and read Uni books - but still not much clearer on what I'll be writing in my essay - will keep reading and hope ideas come to me:p

I have my niece here now until the weekend, so it keeps my 2 amused. We'll go to the cinema tomorrow, Orange 2 for 1 and have Mcd's for dinner on the way back. On Thurs I think girls are planning on meeting up with eldest's friends so that'll get them out.

I have a food intolerance test on thurs - not sure if I've mentioned it. Got it for £24 from £60 through Groupon, so at that price I thought it worth giving a go. I am sure that certain food/drink affects my delicate insides:rotfl: So, I'm looking forward to that. Mine is definitely crisps, in particular my favourites - Tyrrels. I end up feeling really sore if I eat these.

Right, dinner nearly done - must come on and post my meal plans...been slacking with that a bit:o

I really need to be shown how to multi-quote posts! I just don't get it!

pixiechick99

So much for 'Be Happy'...I am the total opposite right now and can't shake it off...hence the not posting:(
I don't know exactly what is making feel low, but I have no motivation or enthusiasm to do anything - everything is getting me down, boooo.

Girls have been with their dad since 1pm so I have just watched some tv, read my book on my bed and had a nap...no college work and no housework...so then I feel more rubbish cos Im lazy.

I have also been chatting to a chap online...I actually went to schooll with him at the start of senior school but didnt really know him then. He seems really nice...but he wants to meet me:o Ok, yes that's normal and I do want to but I am sooo terrified of doing that, I really dont think I could actually go out and meet him...how pathetic am I? So, then I beat myself up about that, how lacking in confidence I am:(

It's dd1's birthday next week...have bought her a fair few bits of clothing/shoes etc. Guess she needs it all and clothes is all she wants.

Oh, I need to go to bed and wake up feeling more cheery;) I just feel like I don't do anything apart from work and that life is passing me by...girls growing up and not needing me so much, its sad:o My Crohn's is up and down - have been cutting out wheat as much as I can, but had pizza for dinner last night and think that affected my tum today. Its hard not knowing what's affecting it that I get confused over what to eat.

Right, I must get off and stop moaning...good to get my whinges out though. Don't like to tell anyone else - not that I have many people to tell:p My mum did text tonight so told her I wasnt a happy bunny and we're going to meet her and my stepdad on mon for a cuppa, so that'll be nice.

Right - bedtime...fingers crossed the black cloud lifts tomorrow when I wake up:)

Keeping_Motivated

Hey don't beat yourself up too much, we ALL have down days and we all have crisis of confidence at times. So allow yourself the down times and then look at whT you want to change and what you would have to do to change it. Baby steps or you'll feel overwhelmed. You stay in a lot and that's probably why you are losing confidence...it's easier and less hard work to stay in in your comfort zone so that's what you do but your yearning for more of a life comes and bites you on the bum now and again and zaps all your energy too by the sounds of it.

I can only suggest baby steps, being kind to yourself, pushing your boundaries and faking it till you actually feel confident.

Maybe post some small goals on here?

And give me one good reason you can't meet up with this guy for a coffee or a glass of wine? Come on? I need a reason lol

pixiechick99

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Hey don't beat yourself up too much, we ALL have down days and we all have crisis of confidence at times. So allow yourself the down times and then look at whT you want to change and what you would have to do to change it. Baby steps or you'll feel overwhelmed. You stay in a lot and that's probably why you are losing confidence...it's easier and less hard work to stay in in your comfort zone so that's what you do but your yearning for more of a life comes and bites you on the bum now and again and zaps all your energy too by the sounds of it.

I can only suggest baby steps, being kind to yourself, pushing your boundaries and faking it till you actually feel confident.

Maybe post some small goals on here?

And give me one good reason you can't meet up with this guy for a coffee or a glass of wine? Come on? I need a reason lol

Thank you KM - brilliant words, that make sense to me:p
I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself but right now it's all I do - I just dislike so much, I need to snap out of it.

A lot of the staying in just comes from the fact that my tum is still rubbish so often and I prefer to stay in rather than risk being out and it plays up:o Then when I do feel well I have nowhere to go or no-one to go with:rotfl: It feels like everyone I know is in a couple:(

As for the guy - arghh, I really am scared of it, even though I kind of know him, we have school in common:) I told my sis and she just can't understand why I feel so terrified of it...then that gets me down that she thinks I'm so ridiculous:o I just want to be full of confidence and actually enjoy going out and meeting new people, not stay home and be on my own forever.

Anyway - must get my face on. I do feel a bit brighter than yesterday thank goodness. Need to go to T's today - would prefer to do online shopping and not leave the house this weekend but I have a £6 off voucher only for use instore so will go there:rotfl:

Thank you for your kind words:A

La_escocesa

Hey Pixiechick :wave:

Sorry you've been feeling like that. It's good to get things off your chest so glad you posted back in Diaryland

I think you should definitely go for a wee drinkypops with this guy. Maybe if you suggested a lunchtime coffee it might not seem as formal...? Or maybe evening is the way to go - you could even have a little vino before you head out!

I like Keeping Motivated's thinking - maybe it would be good to post some goals (baby steps) and then you'll see how much progress you're making.

Hope you're having a good bank holiday

determined_new_ms

hey lovely laydee! What is this I see, have a hug from me & remember you are 100% fantastic so don't go talking about my cyber girl like that! Seriously KM is right, we all have ups & downs & low days, weeks (and in my case sometimes months) but that's ok, you are doing so much fantastic stuff - doing your degree, bring up you kids on your own - don't forget all the great stuff you do & don't be unkind to yourself. Now my kids have grown up I really wish I could take a few years back & have enjoyed it a bit more, there all the time in the world for going out, holidays & spending time on my own, but I can't bring back those years - you've got so much life ahead of you laydee! x

vasseur

Definitely meet this man. You already have something in common. Go for a lunchtime drink as has been suggested if it will be easier.

If it's meant to be it won't be terrifying or hard work and if it's not then at least you have dipped your toe back in the dating pool again