Real Life MMD: Should I ask the bride for my money back?

SamDude

Definately not.

Oh, I meant to say yes.

Yes you should.

haste

I dont think anyone that has posted so far has quite grasped the situation.

The bride didnt ask for the money, she was paying for the hotel and the original poster kindly gave her the money without saying anything.

This makes it a little more difficult to ask for the money back, but if handled correctly and done in a casual manner, ie
"Hey, so i didnt want you to be out of pocket when booking the hotel so transferred the money into your account a while back. Bit silly on my part, i hadnt thought about paying on the day - Is it possible to get the money i sent you back?"

There's also the posibility that the Bride booked the hotel for you, but never expected to pay for it - She was only booking to be helpfull. This is a bit of a touchy subject as it makes it look like you expected her to pay, but if you can word it right and be cool in explaining you never wanted her to in the first place and it was just a misunderstanding you should be good to go.

JayD

YES!!!

You should!

From what you say, there should be no problem at all. Once she realises what has happened I am sure she will refund you with an apology for the misunderstanding.

glasgowsoundman

The original post stated that the bride booked the room and texted to confirm. The original poster didn't say that they were asked to send the money.

If it wasn't identified that this was for the hotel room, the bride could have assumed it was a gift.

Initially, I'd query the hotel (at the time of being asked to pay the bill), then query the bride (asking if the hotel made a mistake).

I have to wonder who would expect the bride to book a room for them anyway. I'd ask the bride if there was a reference number or booking name to quote in order to get any agreed wedding rates. Why would you expect someone, who has enough on her plate, to undertake the task of booking a room, something that I could so easily do myself?

MkkDdd

It doesn't seem to have occurred to anyone that this chap isn't sure the woman hadn't confused his payment with a wedding gift. Did she say she was going to pay for your stay, or did you just assume she would? Do you have any reason to believe she might have thought your paying for the stay would have been thought of by her (or anyone else) as a wedding gift? Do you suspect that might be the case? If so, you certainly need to speak to her (if you don't want to gift the money) but it wouldn't be appropriate to approach her with all guns blazing or even with the expectation of getting the money back or not offending her. It seems highly probably to me that the bride assumed you were trying to help her financially with the wedding by making this a wedding present.

You need to go over all relevant communications prior to the wedding with her with a view to working out how she might have come to this conclusion. If you really can't work it out on your own, then ask her to help, but don't be surprised if she seems somewhat less near and dear as a friend to you afterwards. In such case you can rest assured the feeling is mutual. Is it worth it for £120? It would be to me, but I'm really, genuinely poor. If I weren't, at other times, it wouldn't be. (Maybe that's why I'm poor.)

interflight

Yes with interest

onlypaddy

oh come on this isn't even a dilemma! of course you should ask for it back!

MSE need to get a grip on what is a dilemma and what isn't IMHO

[Deleted User]

Phone her up now, tell her to get off her back and return your money.

Then sleep with her new husband as compensation.

There - that wasn't so difficult, was it?

gaily

Deleted_User wrote: »

Phone her up now, tell her to get off her back and return your money.

Then sleep with her new husband as compensation.

Er you sleep with her new husband, or her to sleep with her husband!!!! Interesting way of wording it......

Craig_Charles

Yeah it's a no brainer!!!