Mooloo's New Home, New Year and New Start part 3

Savvy_sewing

Hello,
I am not too bad. Been rather stressed, and sore. Been trying to stay off of the laptop as it really hurts my arm, then I am useless for anything else.
BF decided to arrange to actually meet me to talk, so on Friday we actually went out to dinner. It was a lovely indian meal, but the place was really a bit too noisey to talk much. Pleasantries etc most of it. I did re-itterate some of the reasons why I had walked etc. He did listen, but didnt do much talking other then the news of his children, and his stay in China, and so now I have to decide where we go from here etc. If we do go further etc. He is going to come back later today, I think to talk. So he is doing all the running. I think realising that he would be on his own at Christmas showed that Putting the children first is one thing, but as they grow into adults they do not put you first!

DGD had a good sleep over, and a good party, and has been her usual menace since she returned yesterday afternoon.
I was inbed by 8pm she really wares me out!
Today she has already raided my makeup bag, destroyed a brush, a lipstick, and the blusher, all in the time that I was putting on my jeans and jumper. And also the bathroom wall is ruined, as its not a washable wall, and blusher was smeared all over the place. So now I will need to really think about decorating the bathroom, and usuing some washable paint!. But will need to tackle the mould that has been constant since we moved in! The bathroom and kitchen being the worst hit areas, side by side.
She also has knocked over my cup of tea, Just as I had put it down on the coffee table, and is now back in the bath cleaning up!! ahem.

Argos got back to me, after the delivery finally arrived at 8.45pm on Friday night, with 3 sets of slippers missing.
So the slippers are due to be delivered on Tuesday now!. I said it was a bit too late for the boys. I am still so angry about that. The couriers let them down apparantly. Great.
I have still a lot to think about, but DGD will be in Afterschool/holiday club tomorrow allowing me a few hours to get my act together and thats when I will see what I need to still do/get, and see if I need to abandon my idea of making things, and if so, see what the bank balance will stand for Wednesday morning, her last day at the holiday club for this year.
Hopefully we will be going to see Molly and her DD on Wednesday afternoon.

Sorry again, if I worried you all. I am trying to pace myself. I still have terrible headaches and they are rather slowing me down.

icefairy

hi mooloo glad you are ok, dgd must be getting excited about christmas now. they can be quite a handfull at that age we have a girl same age in our family she is into everything. im glad that your bf is at least making some effort to save your relaysionship, im afraid ive never been given that chance to talk it through, so if theres any chance and you love him then go for it. i hope you have a lovely peacefull christmas and an even happier new year take care xx:D

Savvy_sewing

icefairy wrote: »

hi mooloo glad you are ok, dgd must be getting excited about christmas now. they can be quite a handfull at that age we have a girl same age in our family she is into everything. im glad that your bf is at least making some effort to save your relaysionship, im afraid ive never been given that chance to talk it through, so if theres any chance and you love him then go for it. i hope you have a lovely peacefull christmas and an even happier new year take care xx:D

Hi all,
I am still busy. Its difficult trying to pace myself, and fit in all the other things than normal.
Yesterday BF did come over. He was going to take DGD to see the lights in the town, but she wouldnt put her coins away, etc and so she missed out. He was more patient with her then I was!. But he doesnt have to have her every day!.
I sat hand sewing a few hearts last night, while watching some TV.
Biggest of Mooloo's car has broken down, so I arranged to meet her this morning, and take her to the shops. Its her BF's birthday today, and she was not able to get his present and card etc. Then Twin1 also rang to say that she couldnt get to go and sign on as she had leant the money to her brother and he had not paid her back!
So I was on a mission today. Took DGD to nursery. Tried to find the straps for the old baby seat, but of course, I couldnt. So I wasted about an hour searching. Picked up twin1, then on to biggest of Mooloo's and we went to town. Twin1 went to sign on, and I went into the centre.
I was relieved to have my Radar Key for the loo's!. I didnt have to stand hotching about in the queue or panicing to find a loo!.:T
We all managed to get the few things we were short of, and then I dropped Biggest off with the baby. Then we just managed to get to the nursery dead on 3pm for DGD.
Twin 1 wouldnt stay the night, but she stayed and played with DGD for about an hour and a half, so that I could have a sleep and get my tablets to work on my arm before I drove her back.
DGD has just had a McD! I really dont like to do it very often, but I knew that it would be easier today. I have some left over lamb casserole for me.
Biggest of Mooloo's has invited my BF to Christmas Dinner if he would like to go, but he has thanked and declined.
We have not exactly worked out what we are to do, or where exactly we are going yet, but we are talking, which is something. We both say that we love each other still, and that we were rather lost without the other, but we will see how the holidays pan out.
I am still inclined to go to Biggests for Christmas day. But may change the plans about stopping. We will see.

DGD is playing with some toys that have been sent to us today. :T:T It has distracted her from keeping asking for her presents!
Her surf board has arrived (Body board) today. So I hope that she will be pleased with that.
The slippers for 2 of the sets from Mr Argos, has arrived, but one pair is still missing!. Yet another Email to the company.
The delivery man asked me if I was ok today. As I was so upset the last time when the delivery was 26 hours late. He said that the driver who had let the company down has now left. He said that he also had serious words with him about how he had let the customers down, and my situation too. I said thanks, it was not his fault, and I bet that the guy didnt give a blind jot! Which he agreed, he hadnt.

Anyway, things are starting to fall into place, but they are all rather haphazardly happening!
My dinner has pinged in the microwave, DGD is watching TV now and its time for me to stop typing as my arm says its done enough today.
Heaven knows when I will be wrapping the presents that I do have!
Oh well.!

Savvy_sewing

Hi, sorry I have been awol, I have been so tired, and so sore.
Everyone is busy this time of year, so I hope that nobody has been worried.
Tuesday I went to Towcester to see my parents really early, as my sister and her partner were due to stop off for a coffee on thier way through, they have come over from france to collect a kitchen/bathroom that my Dad had helped them to buy from B&Q and The bathstore!. Although bits were missing from one of the orders so Dad had collected it. They were only stopping for 30 mins. So Biggest of Mooloo and her Baby, and DGD1 and I went over to wait for them. Alas they were 2 hours late! So that meant that the rest of the time was behind. It was good to see my sister even though it was briefly, but I was standing up too long, and it affected me later.
Molly's daughter came over to help in the afternoon, and she took DGD to Banbury on the bus, leaving me time to rest! Thank goodness. Then after an hour of sleep I managed to get up and get back to my sewing. Although I was not happy with the results. I followed a magazine for making an ipod case, except it came out too big. It will fit a blackberry though.. So I tried again, and then it was too small! so thats now protecting the end of a pair of my scissors. (Bit big), but didnt want to waste it.
So again I tried again. But that had then taken me through Tues afternoon, Tuesday night, (after collecting Twin1 and dropping off Molly's Daughter in town). So I was up late and tired.
Wednesday DGD woke me up just after 6.30 so we were up early. She was at the holiday Club for Breakfast at 8am!. Then I was back home, at the sewing machine. Made a present for Molly, which thankfully went well. Then took TWin1 home. Biggest rang to say that Baby was ill, so she couldnt take DS to sign on, or Twin2 to her counciling. So I did. But while I was waiting I set the kids to work on the flat.
Reluctantly they got going. I made Twin1 collect up all the rubbish, and sweep the floor, while I got DS collecting up all the dirty dishes from around the flat.
I stood at the sink, and washed up, and barked out orders as they were working. Sent DS to the shop for milk and washing up liquid while he was off to cash his Giro, and to get the Electric. Made him pay for it out of his giro. Then I set too telling them all (over a cuppa), that they had to realise that the money they get is not enough to pay the bills and to spend on cigarettes and other things like dvd's etc. That they had to all sit down and work out what they have to pay out and what they then have left for other things. But probably fell on Deaf ears. I made a note of the amount of money on the electric meter on the whipe board, and told then to make a note each day, until they could work out what they are using on an adverage day. I also looked at the hotwater system and reset it, as the offpeak was set wrong. So hopefully they will now have thier water heated up on the cheaper rate. They still do not seem to have the radiators on, but the flat was chilly not cold. With the number of layers they all seem to be wearing they were fine.!
I took those to town that needed to go, and left orders for twin1 to finish off in the flat. Oh and I put some washing on.
Dropped them off and then went back to collect DGD from Nursery.
I was exhausted after all that. Then we went to see Molly and her family and swapped our Christmas presents. DGD was delighted with hers, as she got to open them. I am saving mine till Christmas day or I will not have much to open.
I dropped of Molly#s daughter at her work on my way home. Least I could do for them.
Then I struggled through the rest of the evening, as I didnt have my sleep in the afternoon. But I did manage to make it through to the reasonably respectable time of 9.30 before going to bed.
I managed to make another ipodcase, out of my own thougths, and then I also finished off a wallet that i had started the other day. I would have liked to have done more but I was just too tired.
Today and I am not due to do anything. I am so tired. I am still sitting in my dressinggown, and DGD in her PJ's. She is playing and watching TV and I am catching up on the laptop.
I think BF is coming to see me again later, (a miracle that he is making the effort to come over, and not expect me to be going over there). In fact the other day, he even managed to be a gentleman and offer his arm to take me out to the car, being careful of the ice on the path. Something he would not usually have done. Usually he would have walked on ahead of me.
Anyway, negotiations are slow, but they are ongoing. Still not sorted out the plans for Christmas yet.
Time for me to get dressed I think before the day is gone.
I hope that everyone is getting on well, and that the Christmas frenzy is nearly finished and you can all enjoy the festive season. After all, its supposed to be a symbol of peace and harmony and the giving of gifts is to signify the three kings!! mmmm. Commercialism has taken over.

Savvy_Sue

Mooloo, you have your plans for Christmas, and frankly I would not be upsetting them on his behalf. If Biggest felt gracious enough to invite him to hers that day, I'd say that was more than he deserved or could expect!!! She is probably looking forward to having you, and you'll want to see her babe.

Call me short of Christmas spirit, if you like, but that's my view!!!

supermezzo

^^ Agree with SavvySue.
Stick to your plans with Biggest - he'll most likely change his mind and come over when he realises that you're managing without him.

Keeping_Motivated

I agree I wouldn't be shunning Biggest generous offer or cutting the day short with them to accomodate BF...DD and DGD would come first.

carpedieme

I agree with the above two posters, you have already wasted so much time and effort on this undeserving man, sorry if its a bit harsh but so true! I wish you and your family a happy christmasx

whiteguineapig

have a lovely christmas mooloo and dgd, whichever you decide to do
(but i must admit i also wonder if he only gets in touch because he hasn't anyone else)

Lozzy88

Okay so i am more of a readed they a typer, but come on people, I think you all need to stop being so harsh, This man clearly loves mooloo, in all relationships there comes a time when one of the parties feels like they are giving all and getting nothing in return.

I think you see yourself in the weaker position because of being the main carer of DGD, but your not, its just the way life goes, adjustment takes time, and i do think you are doing totally the right thing. Let him do the chasing, let his see how you do manage without him, it might be a s-l-o-w process but the love is there, so anything is possible.

Although i do agree he needed to be shocked in to action, which is what you did! Well done i hope you and your family have a very merry christmas