Baby Christmas Money - what is it for?

lilac_rainbow

If my kids are gifted money they get to spend it. He is 10 so can choose and she is 3 so we tend to buy her clothes but she LOVES getting new clothes. My mil used to go nuts that the money wasn't put into an account so we told her not to give money and now she doesn't.

We have been on our uppers & borrowed money from the kids. It happens sometimes.

My Grandad gave cheques this Christmas but with the express wish it be spent so I'll give them the cash & pay the cheques in to their accounts

pinkclouds

pebbles88 wrote: »

Family is much more important than money.

I like the quote above - family *is* more important. I *do* understand that some families are so poor they need to pool all their resources to cover essentials i.e. food, shelter, clothing, heating and washing. Any decently brought up child would *want* to help that way.

However, if you are not that hard up then you must exercise your responsibility to manage your children's money (including cash gifts) in trust for them - whether it is cash, stocks, shares or bonds. I see a big difference between a parent needing to buy essential groceries and having no option but to "borrow" from their child and a parent saying "ooh, I fancy a fish supper tonight - I'll have that tenner because I can't be bothered to go the ATM" or "the garden needs to be remodelled - my child can pay for it because they'll use the garden". There is also a difference between actually giving money to a child and giving money to a parent with instructions to use it for the child's toys/clothes/equipment.

tiernsee

When my two get money it goes into their building society accounts, have done this since they were born (DS - 13; DD - 5), fortunately, never had to dip into it for household essentials but if disaster had befallen that affected the whole family I see no problems with doing it, provided that when things improve the money is put back. This year, slightly different, son got £70 and daughter £30. Son has spent his money (X box live membership for a year and microsoft points), daughter has spent part of hers (£18 on a DS game (Toy Story 3)) and the rest will go in the bank.

If I gave money as a gift for children, I really wouldn't have a problem how the money was spent provided it benefited the child in some way. It is always nice, though, to hear how the money is spent and get a thank you letter, and my two will be doing exactly this!

bungle4by4

if the money wasn't available to people 'on their uppers' then in my experience the crisis wouldn't have occured in the first place.

most people 'on their uppers' with kids money in the bank, are just burning to get there grubby fingers on it. so lock it up in an account where it can't be accessed. until the ankle biter is burning to get at it themselves.

Slinky

We gave money to a friend who had a baby earlier in the year. I must say I was surprised when she wrote a thank you note to say that it had gone into a savings account for her son's college fund. I expected it to be spent on something they need/want now, however if that's what they felt they should do with it, it's fine by me.

I give money for friend's children in expectation that it'll be used rather than saved.

kegg_2

milliebear00001 wrote: »

There are clearly many people posting on this thread who have never found themselves 'on their uppers'. I would suggest that for many people, the fact that you haven't HAD TO consider using money given to a child, for essentials, is more down to your good fortune than your good planning - long may that last.

Many, many events befall people with children that they could not possibly be expected to have foreseen. The fact that some of us appear to believe it is always more important to keep a child's money separate from the households', is testament to those individuals' lack of insight into the difficult situations many parents find themselves in everyday. For some, it is a necessity to use a child's money to meet the basic costs of living. I don't know many adults who would resent their parent for making this choice when they were young. I certainly know what I'd prefer my parents' choice to have been in this situation (the 'adult' choice in dire straits).

Wrong as when i was a child we were more than on our uppers. My parents divorced when i was 6 back in the days when there was still shame attached to it. My dad was a gambler o rarely paid anything for our keep. He signed the house complete with mortgage over to my mum and went. We didn't have cental heating, fitted carpets a car or a colour tv. My mum made do and mended and sat up half the night sewing shopping bags which she got pennies for. She cleaned other peoples houses and offices or anything that would bring in money. No child tax credits or mortgage support in those days. But what little money we were given for birthdays or christmas went ways into long term savings accounts

Anyone who says they are poor today doesn't know what real poverty is. They might be poor by todays standards but by the standards of 40 years ago they have plenty.

kindofagilr

lilac_lady wrote: »

I gave money (cash) to a baby this Christmas but after reading some of the posts I'll be giving Mothercare vouchers from now on.

I don't think it's right to use money given to a child for other uses unless it's paid back as soon as possible. What would the parents have done if the cash wasn't available for them to use?

Probably the worst ones you could get imo, their stuff is so expesnive, you could get them vouchers for another baby shop or just a shop that sells baby stuff

I think a lot of people on here have their knickers in a twist over nothing

As far as I can see it as long as the money is spent on the baby it doesnt matter

And if the parents need to borrow it for an emergency (unepxected bills etc) then so be it, as long as they pay it back

kindofagilr

melorablack wrote: »

Out of interest, what do you all do with your child benefit?

I spend my child benefit on a tub of baby milk £9 a week, the rest (£11 a week ish) stays in the account (I have a bank account I used before me and OH got together thats where the CTC and CHB goes) till I need to buy him clothes etc

SugarSpun

kegg wrote: »

Anyone who says they are poor today doesn't know what real poverty is. They might be poor by todays standards but by the standards of 40 years ago they have plenty.

And all the people who are sleeping on the streets/in homeless shelters/in emergency accommodation tonight would weep to hear your story. Their hearts would be positively bleeding, I'm sure.

Not everyone who claims poverty fits the technical description, sure, but to minimise the experience of several thousand people because your poor mother worked hard to raise you is offensive and ridiculous.

tiamai_d

If I give money for a child (firend or family member) then I assume to be giving it as a gift to be used for the welfare and wellbeing of that child. If the parents are in a situation where it can be put into a savings account, great. If they are in a situation where the money I handed them will enable them to get the highchair they want then great. I gave it as a gift.

If it ends up in a bank account and a few years later mum finds herself on her own with no money for heating in the middle of winter, know what? It goes on gas and I'd be happy that I kept that child warm when times got tough. Anyone who honestly thinks nothing of raiding their childs bank account is someone you probably wouldn't give cash to anyway.

If you have such a problem with how people spend money, don't give them money! Open an account and hand it to the child when they are 18. Or wait till they are 18. Or just don't bother.