Baby Christmas Money - what is it for?

puddles

grey_lady wrote: »

If you cant afford to run a car then dont run a car - simple. To take money out of a childs Christmas gift money to spend on anything other than that child seems wrong, - borrowing from it on a short-term basis if your broke then fair enough, but car repairs, gas/electric down to the parents to provide surely?

An unexpected car repair is not a part of 'normal running costs', but you've obviously never been caught unaware and always been in a financial position to sort these things - well lucky you. Unfortunately there are a lot of people who live to a very tight budget and when these things happen it can be very disruptive.

If the car wasn't fixed then the guy loses his job - what is better for that child's future, some money in the bank to be used x years from now or a father who remains employed and a roof kept over that family's head?

This is not a case of frivolous spending but an unfortunate occurance which necessitates the spending of that money to maintain the stability and survival of that family. When funds are more freely available who's to say that child won't be bought a toy or the money be out in a savings account? However, at this moment in time the fixing of the car is a priority to keep the father employed.

I'd love to live in a world where everyone was financially prepared for everything life throws at them, unfortunately that only exists in people's minds. It's very easy to look down your nose at someone, until you are in that same unfortunate position.

Blobby8_2

So, lesley74 (op) there you have it, the consensus appears to be that your money can be spent on anything that benefits the child , including food, or a head gasket, and that once you have given the money its none of your business. Strange days indeed.

vegasvisitor

Yes, have read it all with interest. I'm a bit surprised by the replies, but my own thoughts on the matter remain the same. I still think it should either be put in the baby's bank account, or spent on something 'fun' for the baby. Even towards large garden items like swings etc. Just not for essentials, things that the parents should buy.

I know not to give cash gifts to young children now. I also wonder at which point the parent has to let the child take the money. When they're 4 or 5 do they take it from them and spend it on what they want, or are we just talking about an age where they are too young to open the card themselves with the money in it.....???

bestpud

lesley74 wrote: »

Yes, have read it all with interest. I'm a bit surprised by the replies, but my own thoughts on the matter remain the same. I still think it should either be put in the baby's bank account, or spent on something 'fun' for the baby. Even towards large garden items like swings etc. Just not for essentials, things that the parents should buy.

I know not to give cash gifts to young children now. I also wonder at which point the parent has to let the child take the money. When they're 4 or 5 do they take it from them and spend it on what they want, or are we just talking about an age where they are too young to open the card themselves with the money in it.....???

My dd is 9 and has only this year taken charge of her own birthday money, but I still keep a close eye on it.

Since she became aware of money, I have put so much into the bank and the rest up in the cupboard and reminded her she has it there if she said she wanted anything. She tends to consider what she buys more carefully if it is her own money she is spending!

So I suppose it is when theu understand what money is that it changes for me...?

Before then it was always put in their savings account.

poppy_f1

i dont have kids but if i give cash as a present for friends children its not up to me to dictate how thats spent imo
as long as the child is looked after, gets clothed, toys and every other expense that goes with entertaining children then i dont mind what my money is spent on

JodyBPM

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

.

I'm not a parent myself but I have been a giver of cash to a baby or a small child many, many times in the past and the money has nearly always really been intended to ease the burden on the parent/s. .

If the money is for the parents, why not give it TO THE PARENTS rather than as a gift TO THE CHILD.

If I had friends or family members who were struggling to cope with normal day to day expenses, I'd give THEM money if I could. Anything I gave to A CHILD would be for THE CHILD.

If I had wanted to give it to the parents, I would have. But if I gave it to the CHILD, I would mean it to go to the CHILD.

shellsuit

We had £50 of the babies in the glass in the cupboard and my Dad gave him £50 for Christmas too. (He'd got the kids presents but always gives them a bit of cash to spend in the sales and he won't give one without the other no matter how many times I tell him the baby doesn't need or understand!)

So, he's got £100 in a glass in the cupboard. He doesn't need clothes, toys, a pushchair or a highchair, otherwise that's what it would have been spent on, so we're keeping it till the Spring when we get our back garden done and we're going to buy him some garden toys with it (little tikes climbing frame/slide etc).

I did spend £10 on him today on 2 tops in the Next sale, but I didn't take the £10 from his money because he didn't really need the tops, I just liked them.

I have done and still will do borrow money from the glass with his money in it, but he always gets it back.

We have bought him a car seat with his money in the past. Yes we could have bought him a cheap one for £30, but we used our money and his to buy a good sturdy Britax seat which will be more durable and last much longer than a cheaper one.

For those that say if you have kids you should be able to afford them so should buy all their essentials like a highchair and a buggy ~ well here's news for you, a highchair and a buggy aren't essentials!

BitterAndTwisted

JodyBPM wrote: »

If the money is for the parents, why not give it TO THE PARENTS rather than as a gift TO THE CHILD.

If I had friends or family members who were struggling to cope with normal day to day expenses, I'd give THEM money if I could. Anything I gave to A CHILD would be for THE CHILD.

If I had wanted to give it to the parents, I would have. But if I gave it to the CHILD, I would mean it to go to the CHILD.

Well, that's just fine and dandy. The OP presumably started this thread to elicit opinions so I gave mine and now you've given yours. Neither of us is guaranteed to have given the right one, no matter how strongly you feel or HOW MANY TIMES you use the caps lock.

Just a question: if you've had friends going through exceptionally challenging times have you ever tried to press money into their hands? Ever considered how patronising that might seem to them? Giving cash for the baby/small child is a darned sight easier and less embarrassing all round, let me tell you.

tara747

mummyroysof3 wrote: »

i read it as that she would use the money then it would be like the relative bought the toy not her

But in her example she bought the toy BEFORE the money was given, without knowing that the child would receive a cash gift. That is totally wrong imho.

penelopedee_2

When my nephew was due, his parents had just got their first house together. So I saved and gave them a lot of (a famous hs store) vouchers for their Christmas/new house/welcome to the baby sort of thing present. I made it clear they could spend it whatever way they needed to, thinking that times were hard etc. I used a store where they could buy anything but in my mind was thinking a set of clothes for the little one or a winters coat for one of the parents if that was needed.

But actually they told me afterwards they bought a new ornament for house. I know I shouldn't comment but I was a bit gutted cos I thought I would be helping them to get something they really needed. I wish now I had just put money into the baby's account after he was born. It was a lot of money to blow on an ornament.