Rethinking your life....

seven-day-weekend

mardatha wrote: »

I have the same problem Downshifter. I agree with all posters re life being an adventure & not being rigid - that's my philosophy too. But the problem is now that I don't know what I want to do, don't have a dream in my head at the moment ! :mad:
I "retired" with ME at 55, never once regretted it or wished I was back at work. But I'm finding it hard to find a new direction, seem to be aimlessly getting up and floating through the days. Quite happy-ish but there's something missing & I cant seem to find it.
I had problems with the OH when he took early retirement at 61 and went on pension credit. He was very difficult at first and I got him all motivated - he went back to his love of bikes and bought a Suzuki Bandit - but I can't seem to motivate meself !

My husband bought a beautiful Triumph Bonneville earlier this year.:)

Farway

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

My husband bought a beautiful Triumph Bonneville earlier this year.:)

I have always fancied one of those, but I know I would probably kill myself before I got it home, I have full bike licence, but last time on one was 40 years ago. Think I will stick to car / bus /foot for the moment

mardatha

We had the original Bonnie in 1968 I have a bike license too but wont use it again either, roads too busy and winters too long . But it's his thing, I'm still looking for mine ...

seven-day-weekend

Oh our Bonnie is a 2004 retro model with brand new engineering - same beautiful style but doesn't leak oil all over the place.....:rotfl:

calypso_rhapsody

Not sure if you're the active type? But if so, have you thought about taking up cycle-touring? Cheap way to travel - especially if you are willing to camp (though i confess i'm not!) and a good way to meet people. The cycle touring club has groups around the country and most organise rides each weekend. Mind you a suitable bike will not be cheap if bought new but you could look around for a second hand one ....

[Deleted User]

:)Hi DS I think whenever we pass a significant decade life reminds us that we're not going to be here forever and therefore, as you are doing, it's time to make sure that we're happy with our lives. (Of course many people don't have the courage to do it - even in small ways - and make their children / homes / families / friends / partners / other things "responsible" for this, when really it's about them).

I don't mean this to sound morbid - but I DO think it's a good idea to think forward to your old age, even to your death bed, and think about what you are going to REGRET not doing. What will you tell yourself off for - for not being courageous enough; for not taking enough risks?

Then, look back, into your childhood: what did you WANT to do with your life; what dreams did you have? What could you take from those things that you could develop now?

An example is a friend of mine who had dreamed of being a ballerina as a child. She grew too tall and ended up as a teacher. But in her retirement, she started volunteering at a local dance school, AND she put money aside to travel to see the Bolshoi in Moscow. (I need to say that she developed cancer - which made her suddenly more focused on her own life and needs, and finally shut her husband up about "wasting money" doing things that "only" SHE wanted to do). She did eventually succumb to the cancer, and one of the things she said in her farewell letter to her friends was that the past couple of years had been the most wonderful of her life - and she urged us all to follow our dreams.

You may not have a clear "dream" at the moment. It doesn't need to be a Big Plan - just take the first step towards finding one.

Good Luck!

t0rt0ise

I recently went through similar. At the age of 55 things were changed round at work and I wasn't happy with it and it made me think of what I was doing with my life. So I left my job and then upped and moved to London. I've always wanted to live in London so the desire wasn't on a whim but the doing of it was.

So here I am living in Central London with everything I want on my doorstep. For reasons (loss of some vision), I don't drive any more so being somewhere where public transport is good is important to me. And I am now doing things that I couldn't do before because of transport problems. I'm now looking for a part time job. Don't want to work full time as I've too much else to do.

Money could well be a problem in the future but I'm not thinking about that! As some others say, think too much and you'll do nothing.

cavework

Please .. just do it .. have fun.
Do mad stuff, laugh a lot and never ever think 'I'm too old or to sensible / what will people think?'
Thats for people in their 20's.:rotfl:
Sit in your rocking chair at 85 wearing a HUGE smile and have no regrets.

lilac_lady

As the Ricky Nelson Garden Song says "I'm all right now, I've learned my lesson well, you can't please everyone so you gotta please yourself".

Say "no" more often. It frees you up and if we can't please ourselves now, we'll run out of time.

Be happy!

stilernin

t0rt0ise wrote: »

As some others say, think too much and you'll do nothing.

I did a similar thing at more or less the same age, 4 years ago.

I was living alone in suburban Herts; the children had left home and I was working 60hrs plus. Too busy to get up to London from the end of the Met Line or even socialise locally to make single friends after being on my own for nearly ten years. Long standing friends were great,but were couples.

Now I've been in Newcastle for four years with a downsized job and house with no mortgage. I can walk into the fabulous city for theatre, lectures, restaurants, shops or just walking along the Quayside and river (you all know the view with the bridges), and the coast and country is so close too. There is so much to do and I have a circle of wonderful new friends. A lot of things are cheaper and transport is great, even in the recent snow. It is true what the locals say, 'the NE is a well kept secret'.

The icing on the cake is that I live within a mile of DD who came up here to uni and stayed, married and now has a child of her own.

I do miss friends from the south, but I don't regret the decision to move one little bit.