Rethinking your life....

downshifter

I'm 60 next birthday and have been feeling strongly that I want to rethink my life and where I'm going and what I want from it. Did that happen to you and what decisions did you make?

I'm rethinking work/life balance, where I live, finances (what are they?!) and so on. Feel determined to make some changes but not sure what.

Any thoughts you can share with me?

Thanks

DS

Errata

I think the key is to identify goals that will serve for 20/30 years and work backwards identifying all the things that need to happen in order to achieve them.

pollypenny

I was worried about how Oh and I would manage in retirement, but you cut your cloth according to means.

We eat out once a week, using vouchers bought with our Tesco tokens, go the the cinema using Orange Wednesday 2 for 1. Most importantly, I am not spending all my life working, as before.

OH has become my very good friend.

Savvy_Sue

pollypenny wrote: »

Most importantly, I am not spending all my life working, as before.

I'm finding the same, but atm that's not through choice! DH has had to slow down too.

pollypenny wrote: »

OH has become my very good friend.

I honestly don't know what I'd do without him. Well, I wouldn't dress, for starters!

So, this may seem off topic, but it IS worth thinking about these things while you have a choice, but expect the unexpected ...

downshifter

Oh dear! Now I feel really guilty! I'm sound in body and in mind (well, my children beg to differ on the latter) and have choices. I don't have a DH/OH or whatever any more so my choices affect only me at that level. In a way that's why I want to make the best of my time here, or at least the next 10/20 years. It's that awareness of mortality thing.

I do need to formulate some goals but have no idea what, that's the problem, though I do know I don't just want to drift through the next few years as I am doing now. Money does worry me though, not for meals out but just basic essentials such as rent and fuel but I'm a perpetual optimist, things always work out and I can carry on doing the jobs I'm doing until I drop if I have to.

Thanks for the replies kind people. Need to get to work now, isn't it wonderful that it's so much warmer.!

DS

getmore4less

A bit younger and going through something similar due to redundancy a year ago and life changing events in the family.

One thing I would say is identify things that you can do now and the next few years but will get harder to do later.

Travel is a good example, you have 10-15 years before insurance becomes very expensive, so if you want to do some travel start now.

If moving, think about if mobility and driving become issues

........


If the kids will look after you and put you up it could be time to really downsize and get spending.

Savvy_Sue

didn't mean to make you feel guilty!

Errata's advice coupled with get more's is the way to go. definitely move house sooner rather than later if that's something you want to do, but make sure it's to a place which 'works' if you can't drive / become less mobile.

even think about sheltered housing BEFORE you need it!

scotsbob

My advice would be to stop thinking "old."

My Dad got his last job promoton at 66. My Aunt was still dating at 82. I know a lady who is 68 and trying to get into an old peoples home because "I'm nearly 70 you know"

Once you convince yourself that you are old and retired then you start to live your life on that basis.

downshifter

scotsbob wrote: »

My advice would be to stop thinking "old."

My Dad got his last job promoton at 66. My Aunt was still dating at 82. I know a lady who is 68 and trying to get into an old peoples home because "I'm nearly 70 you know"

Once you convince yourself that you are old and retired then you start to live your life on that basis.

I never was thinking 'old' - my question related to thinking quite the opposite. What can I plan for the next 20 years that is likely to be fun, a bit different and full of life! Now's the time!

And I beat you, my mum is 85, she downsized from family home around 3 years ago, but certainly not thinking about sheltered housing yet, she just moved into a smaller end terraced house. She is 'dating' a young man of 88, both of them drive and go all over the place in their little cars, fly off around the world, have an immensely lively social life, read, go to theatres, she sees the latest films before I've even heard of them, blah blah you get the picture. My master plan a few years ago was to find work that wouldn't expect me to retire at a certain age (a brief spell in the civil service confirmed the importance of doing that) and I've done that tho the pay is dire. Am ready now for the next master plan, but not sure what!

It's been really interesting, and immensely helpful, to hear the different views on here, thank you so much. They've helped me clarify my thinking really well. I appreciate that not everyone has good health as they get older, (my own father died in his early 70s of Alzheimer's) but the women in our family seem to do well, my grandmother died just a few weeks after admitting herself into an old peoples home (at 94 she wanted a change!) and my aunt, like my mother, is thriving in her late 80s - no sheltered housing needed for her either. I seem to have those genes so want to make the most of them!

Thanks again

DS

mary-op

When I hit the 60 mark I started to set myself little 'challenges' for each year and do something I'd never done before. It really gave me something to focus on other than the face in the mirror that just wasn't me.........lol
So far I've done water colours,learnt the basics of using a computer, scrapbooking, craft/card making, kept a journal for each year, done (and still doing) family history. This year we started going on coach holidays to places we'd not been to before in uk.
Now running out of ideas so might end up re-doing something I've not done for a long long time, like flower arranging..........something I have an 'end product' for my efforts.
OH is younger than me but not in the best of health but despite this we foster teenagers and that keeps us 'young' (or at least makes us forget our age)

Did think about 'downsizing' particularly after my mum died but we love our house............it's big but we enjoy the space it gives us to do our own thing.

Interesting to see what other people do.

viv0147

I retired 2 years ago and I have had to adapt to my lower income. I now live on pension credit in the beginning I found it difficult but now I have everything I need and I am really enjoying my retirement. The foundation of the success was this website with its many ways of saving money and the plentiful advice in the forums.
I couldn’t cook now I make all my meals and very nice they are, I have a bread maker so for the last 12 months I haven’t bought a shop loaf of bread. I can now make pickles, and red cabbage, pies, pasties, cakes, etc. I even make food for my children now! When they visit or I visit them they are asking Dad what have you made us this time? Lol.
I didn’t know how to wash and iron clothes I can now!!! I bought a steam press, which is a lot easier than an iron.
I had never budgeted if I wanted something I would get it on times using the credit card, now I save for it.
I no longer have a car but thankfully I have a free bus pass, which I make full use of and of course that’s been a major saving
I didn’t think about checking the reduced foods, but all that has changed now my store cupboard is full, my freezer is full, I now check for offers in the Supermarkets and providing its something I use I will buy at least 6 of them, quite often now its only fresh fruit veg and milk I need, so that enables me to take more advantage of any suitable offers, shopping used to be a chore now I find it an adventure.
Also I can actually save some money for holidays, all these things I have been learning using the forums.
I spend quite a bit of time on my computer I find it fascinating I started off with a PC about 10 years ago and I didn’t have a clue its been a challenge but a very enjoyable one I now have a Mac computer and I am fairly competent but there is always something new to learn.
I have a very full life now sometimes I am struggling to make time for the things I want to do, I hope this will give you some food for thought Lol.