Nice people thread part 3- Nice as pie

GDB2222

lostinrates wrote: »

Happy Big Birthday PN.

We had the first BBQ of the season. DH is full of cold .....poor him But its what he wanted so we did it. We got some ore stuff planted, but it doesn't look very much different.....lots of weeding.

I did my gardening for the year. I bought a box of bedding plants - pansies - and planted 6 of them. I even watered them. They'll die soon. I have that effect on plants.

lostinrates

GDB2222 wrote: »

Can I just ask for the collective views of the wise here about something that's bothering me?

My daughter was talking to a friend of hers a couple of years ago, and he told her that he is gay. Fair enough, he was mid-20's at the time, so he ought to have made his mind up by then. I was therefore surprised to read in the local rag about his recent engagement - NOT to my daughter, thank goodness. Surely, this isn't going to work out, and should somebody warn the girl?

BTW: I have considered the possibility that he isn't gay at all and just wanted to get rid of my daughter, but I'm assured that that wasn't the case.

I was talking to a friend about this this week, how odd!

Its happened a lot to friends of ours starting when we were about 27/8 and in the year we were thirty it seemed to be a spate of ''turns''. A friend called me last week about another one.

One of my male friends told me he thinks in retrospect their was social pressure for the camp to be gay where as he is camp heterosexual and didn't know it was possible, plus he felt more comfortable with men as he understood them better.my SILs best friend started seeing girls a few years ago (aged I think 26/7) and it REALLY upset her, as he had always reassured her that if ''he were interested in women she'd be his ideal woman'' and so him deciding he was interested in a woman who is nothing like her really upset her.

Its quite possible some people are simply more transient in sexuality, bi sexual or genuinely changed track..seems to me its no worse a choice than any other. I could have fallen in love with anyone, despite deciding, relatively late (i.e. not school age) I was heterosexual.

edit: I have no idea of course, whether those that changed their minds did so genuinely or won't change their minds again...which ever way they plumped.

PasturesNew

GDB2222 wrote: »

Can I just ask for the collective views of the wise here about something that's bothering me?

My daughter was talking to a friend of hers a couple of years ago, and he told her that he is gay. Fair enough, he was mid-20's at the time, so he ought to have made his mind up by then. I was therefore surprised to read in the local rag about his recent engagement - NOT to my daughter, thank goodness. Surely, this isn't going to work out, and should somebody warn the girl?

BTW: I have considered the possibility that he isn't gay at all and just wanted to get rid of my daughter, but I'm assured that that wasn't the case.

He's probably wondered if he was gay for years, then decided that because he found a few blokes fanciable/interesting that he must be. Then he wrestled with this, before "coming out" .... since then he's realised that it was a passing fad he had and it was a bit of "obsessive admiration" rather than liking it up the bum, so that settled he went and got a gf. Or, he discovered that you can fancy boys and girls and that just makes you bisexual... and he picked a girl to marry.

I'd not think he was hiding it/in denial and it'd all end in tears.

How many "men prefer blondes" - yet marry brunettes?

PasturesNew

I've always been 100% hetero, no doubts whatsoever. Boys are fab. David Cassidy, David Essex, Donny Osmond, Marc Bolan. Yummy.

misskool

GDB2222 wrote: »

Can I just ask for the collective views of the wise here about something that's bothering me?

My daughter was talking to a friend of hers a couple of years ago, and he told her that he is gay. Fair enough, he was mid-20's at the time, so he ought to have made his mind up by then. I was therefore surprised to read in the local rag about his recent engagement - NOT to my daughter, thank goodness. Surely, this isn't going to work out, and should somebody warn the girl?

BTW: I have considered the possibility that he isn't gay at all and just wanted to get rid of my daughter, but I'm assured that that wasn't the case.

He's probably bisexual. People change, they do different things at different points in their live.

I'm more concerned that the local rag announces engagements

PasturesNew

misskool wrote: »

I'm more concerned that the local rag announces engagements

Classifieds section. Parents pay for it to be listed. It's traditional if you're the sort of person who announces these things in the Classifieds. 18th/21st birthdays, engagements, marriages, births.... income spinner for the local rag's classifieds section. Probably cost them £5.

lostinrates

PasturesNew wrote: »

How many "men prefer blondes" - yet marry brunettes?

I love this! I'm emailing it to the friend I was nattering to this week.

LydiaJ

GDB2222 wrote: »

I did my gardening for the year. I bought a box of bedding plants - pansies - and planted 6 of them. I even watered them. They'll die soon. I have that effect on plants.

I planted some pansies once, when I was little. After a long time a small shoot came up. Only one, but at least there was one. I tended it lovingly, and it grew a bit more. It got bigger and bigger, but didn't flower. Eventually it grew into... a sycamore. It must have been more than 15ft high by the time my dad chopped it down for fear of what its root system might do to the foundations of the house, or the drains, or whatever. Right to the end, the family always referred to it as "Lydia's pansy".

silvercar

GDB2222 wrote: »

I did my gardening for the year. I bought a box of bedding plants - pansies - and planted 6 of them. I even watered them. They'll die soon. I have that effect on plants.

I can keep bedding plants alive, nothing else.

I think your a couple of weeks too early. The trick to keep them flowering is to water with plant food regularly.

silvercar

GDB2222 wrote: »

Can I just ask for the collective views of the wise here about something that's bothering me?

My daughter was talking to a friend of hers a couple of years ago, and he told her that he is gay. Fair enough, he was mid-20's at the time, so he ought to have made his mind up by then. I was therefore surprised to read in the local rag about his recent engagement - NOT to my daughter, thank goodness. Surely, this isn't going to work out, and should somebody warn the girl?

BTW: I have considered the possibility that he isn't gay at all and just wanted to get rid of my daughter, but I'm assured that that wasn't the case.

For youngsters of today, in most circles, being gay is a non issue. So coming out is so acceptable and a non-event that people don't give it much consideration. Maybe he thought he was and then realised he wasn't that interested, so became straight. Maybe its more fluid these days, whereas years ago you wouldn't come out if you had the slightest doubt, just because of all the hassle it would mean. So now someone declares themselves gay for the moment, then decide its not for them.

Maybe the girl knows and doesn't care. Post people have a past, maybe its less of an issue these days exactly what that past contained.

Michael Portillo is married after having some homosexual activity in his past. (interesting article on it here:http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/michael-portillos-sexual-past-is-colourful--but-its-his-own-affair-1117478.html)
I'm sure there are others. Isn't William Hague rumoured to be married but gay?

Reading back what I've written I feel so old.