Memorygirls - The Matrix Reloaded

psychopathbabble

MG, the time will come when it can all slot into place. No point in pushing it and putting too much pressure on yourself. You said yourself your mum and boys are your priority, and you have proved to yourself you can cope with a hell of a lot. I agree with KC... and please don't think of it as a failure to anyone or anything. Sending you hugs xx

MrsMoo2U

MG, I :T:T:T your sense, and bravery to come to this decision. There is no failure in this at all. You tried it one way and realised that it didnt work for you that way for now. It doesnt mean that you cant try a different way or that eventually you can increase what you are doing.

Why should anybody not speak to you in the morning? You have been honest and open about the situation. And perhaps we have all pushed you on a little faster than was necessary or you have felt the need to move quickly because of the momentum on the thread. If that is the case then I am sorry that you were put in that position even if it was unintentionally. It is scary what positivity can do sometimes.

Your Mum and your boys should always be your priority. We only get one shot at life and that includes spending time with your family as well as having a go at a business. You should be proud of yourself as you have come so far from where you were this time last year. You have had the courage to put the brakes on instead of careering into a bigger disaster zone.

Despite being overwhelmed and maybe a little depressed you still have a sense of humour with the ugly sisters comment so there is light at the end of the tunnel. Even if there isnt yet the glass slipper and the prince. Your carriage will arrive when the time is right for you and the boys.

In the meantime, take some time out for yourself. Have a little breather and why not just think about being kind to yourself for once.

Big Hugs.You have my email and number so if you just want to have a girlie chat or to bawl your eyes out you are more than welcome to get in touch.

Tescodealqueen

Can I echo earlier posts and say that you have to do what is right for you. I am happy work through the on line stuff, as I am sure others will be.
Just take care of "you all" for now.

groatie_queen

MG, this has always been about helping you to have the best life for you. There is no 'one size fits all', and of course your Mum and the littlies come first. I remember someone saying that the mentors probably are used to working with people who have back-up - for what you were attempting to do you needed staff to generate the business, while you presented it. And you needed a housewife and a nanny if not two! So don't beat yourself up for realising the business model didn't work for you.

Sorry I have to run for work but just wanted to send a great big

HUG ((((((( ))))))))

GQ xox

Kittikins

Hugs MG xx I agree with the posters above, and have to confess that I very quickly came to the same conclusion when I was talking about starting up my own VA business a few months.....I needed the income from my full-time job to pay the bills, and over-confidently thought that I could be a single mummy to DD, work full-time, study for a GCSE, be a guiding leader, be very involved with DD's school activities, volunteer at another school, recover from a bit of a breakdown AND start up a new business doing something that I do want to do!!

Something had to give very quickly for me, and after helping a few people and earning the tiniest sum, lol, I couldn't manage......and so, I'm now "under the doctor" to get me back on an even keel, and am trying not to feel like a failure for giving up so quickly.

I admire you so much for pulling out all the stops and giving it your best shot in the format you did and proving to yourself and others that you are an amazing teacher and speaker - and am pleased that you and Mr and Mrs B have had constructive chats.

Big hugs MG xx

Craftyscholar

MG - hugs.

Another one popping in to say I think you have made the right decision. I was concerned that your plan depended on no family emergencies (as you said the mentors are used to working with men who have others to deal with the 'family' bit) but admired the way your positivity and enthusiasm were carrying you forward.

I have never done the sort of on-line course you are talking about (and the brain cell is def. having senior moments) so would be happy to test your new plan - probably to destruction :rotfl:

Firewalker

Good morning MG, good morning all,

I read your message last night and it has been at the back (well, no actually, at the front) of my mind since. Why? For several reasons.

1) I sense in your message a feeling of defeat and want to say that there is no such thing in the situation. How did you decide that anyone expects miracles from you? No, all I expect from someone as talented and knowledgeable as you is to be moving forward. And you have been – this is just a bleep. There are problems and to the degree that these problems can be formulated they can be solved.
2) You have under-estimated the good will within the Matrix. MG, we have all pledged to support and mentor each other and one of our own having rough time is not going to change this. In fact, this is one of the situations where the Matrix can show its real strength.
3) Draw on the strengths of the Matrix members – yes, they can help you and support through your budgeting but they can do so much more. We are great with problems of different kind, we love trying to solve them and we all have so much talent and ability. One just has to read the Matrix skills tread on the other site. Come back – and remember that one of the first instructions from Mr B was ‘accept all offers of help and support’.

Chunk it, girl! Take some time off – without guilt, without fear. Sit down and work out what are the problems and start solving them. Martin says that there is no debt problem that cannot be solved; I say that there is no problem that cannot be solved.

First order problems: organising of days and making time for work. Schooling? Think – there are options. I realise you are attached to the Montessori but this might be a case of ‘losing a battle to win a war’. Home schooling for DS1– how much effort and time would it take? Can you combine it with your business (mind-mapping material; curriculum etc; developing tools to support home schooling parents; creating support groups; providing online support). Alternatively, could he go to a normal school? DS 2 – play groups; start school soon...how about going to a normal school. Remember, out attachments hold us back and stop us seeing obvious solutions.

Second order problems: designing your business so that you do not have to be on the road much. This is probably easier that the other one – in fact, having attended one of your courses there are very few elements of it that cannot be delivered remotely (one of the memory techniques).

Now I have to go but really hope that today you woke up, looked around you and said ‘Today is another day.’ And believe it as well.

Firewalker

Alisonpennypincher

MG, Failure is not a word that i associate with you. I believe that you have made the right decision, and applaud you for putting you boys and family first, IMHO not enough people do that these days.

You are an inspiration to many, certainly me, maybe you should start to write an "old Style" home management book, doing up furniture, basic knitting, budgeting and recipes. Here is one customer who'd buy it straight away!

Did you sort out a parents car rota? Would enable you to stay home on the days DS2 is not a kindi?

I'm just about to start my mad hour of school run stuff so must dash, but please please, don't beat yourself up over this. Just see it as a change of direction, and prepare to face the next challenges with the "MG magic" and of course all the help from us matrix ladies that you need.

APP
x

crickett1234

MG, that was a lovely and brave post and well done for posting it. You did completely the right thing, and I don't think anyone in their right mind would be angry at you. I am certainly not.

And it is NOT a failure. You have written lots of stuff, you have an idea for something that could work (I REALLY believe the internet seminars and bits is the way forward for you) and most of all... you created the Matrix, this well of positivity. No understatement... the Matrix has totally changed my life. And I look forward to it changing my life going forward.

Take some time for yourself when you can, have a good old sob, find your joy again, get thee down to the Benefits Agency and get signed up to everything you can get (and you will get off it all again... we know you will!), get to your doctor and make sure you are as healthy as you can be and maybe get some help for the blues/minor depression, post on here when you can, and let us know if there is ANYTHING we can do to help you.

Marru

MG - fully supporting you with your decision. And it is great that you have a fall back and your talents can be utilised in a way that is suitable for your circumstances. I would love to be one of your guinea pigs (especially if you get that speed reading course up and running :j) Be good to yourself