Having a wedding with no guests..

Faerie

My mum told me that you will never please everyone, whatever you do somebody will have something an opinion, so the least you can do is please yourselves. We want a small wedding, I want just the 2 of us. Like you I feel sick at the thought of people watching me say our vows, I think it should be a private thing! I don't like being the centre of attention or having my photo taken so getting married is such a horrible thought. I just want to be married without the actual wedding part of things!

We have cut things down to immediate family only (and even then it's too big for me - 40 guests - it snowballs!!) and a lovely meal, no party afterwards. My family have all said that they wouldn't be offended if we eloped. I think his would be upset over it. My mum and step dad went to Gretna Green and rang us all after! A girl at work came back after xmas married. They had got married on xmas eve just the 2 of them and their kids, one was old enough to be a witness so they had to ask a passerby to witness, I think that sounded lovely!

minnie123

Do you have to have a ring for the most basic ceremony? If not I don't think I will bother I dont think I will wear it after. I would rather put the money towards our house fund.

supercat92

I think you might regret it, if you don't invite close friends and family. It doesn't have to be a huge affair but I think its nice to share the special day with the ones you love. This can still be in a registry office. I think you do need to have witnesses there. You can have a wedding on a budget and still have a lovely day! :beer:

sammy_wheeler

no you dont have to have a ring- the ring exchange in the civil cermoney is optional

minnie123

The thing is I don't view the actual day as being special if that makes sense I view us being married for every day from then on as special so the actual day does not bother me - If I could do it online I would lol.

I think we will have the registry office with Mums as witnesses and I think I will forget the meal afterwards.

Does anyone have a rough idea of how much the cheapest could cost me? no dress, suits or rings just the actual basic ceremony and other requirements?

minnie123

That is great if no rings are needed - I do like rings and he brought me one a few yrs ago for valentines day but I always forget to wear it.

bride2be2012

It's really up to you what you want for your day, but I know where you are coming from with not wanting to hurt people. I'd have us going on holidays somewhere and come back married, but my mum'd be hurt and I don't think OHs mum would ever forgive me!

We were going to be having a big-ish wedding (60 during the day), which quite frankly I didn't really want, so I managed to get OH to see sense, and we got it down to 40ish - and were planning this for autumn 2012. However, deep down I kept wishing we could just get married with our parents there, then have a reception later in the evening for friends and family, but OH wanted all his siblings (+ their OH's and kids) there, so I went along with our plans. Like you, I'd rather put the money towards our house fund.

However, in the past month, for one reason and another, things are moving on the house front more quickly than we thought they would. This means that all big wedding plans are on hold, as we need every penny for the house. And so now, OH is more and more coming round to my way of thinking: that we just have our parents at the ceremony, go for a nice meal with them, then having a reception at night. I'm hoping it can be done for under £350, and hopefully, I won't need to wait another 2 years!!

hellokitty08

My sister is 6 months pregnent and when she found out changing her name by dead poll, to have the same surname as the baby would cost about as much as a wedding, she decided to get married. I will be adding to my post later but this is what we did, as she has no money and just wanted to get married.

Got her dress and jacket from ebay - £50 (paid by me)
Booked the ceremony at register office - £125 (paid by her)
made her own flowers - £10 (paid by mum)
Suits from Asda for Groom and best man - (£50 from asda paid for by best man
Invites made from M&S specials at Home Bargains - £2.40 (paid by her)
Car was driven by a friend
Rings - Wanted white gold, so cost £120 for pair (paid for by mum)
Meal after wedding, cost £15.50 per head and we invited people to join us if they were happy to pay for their own meal and drinks, added this to invitation,

We know it’s not traditional
It’s not the way it’s done
But instead of a having a wedding list
We invite you to fill your tum.

We couldn’t afford a wedding reception,
So please do not take offence
We do not want to upset you
That’s not the way it’s meant.

After the ceremony we have booked a meal,
So instead of a gift what we ask of you instead,
Is that you if join us for this celebration,
your happy to pay £15.50 a head.

Had a fab day.

janeawej

I once worked in an office next door to the register office, one say a couple came in and asked if 2 of use would witness their wedding, well you can imagine we all wanted to! They had a lovely wedding, just them and 2 secretaries for witness so its not as unusual as you think, live your dreams!

tartantotty

My sis got married abroad, with only her, hubby, and her best friend. They weren't going to tell the family til they came back, but my OH was seriously ill, and they wanted us to know that the holiday they had booked, was more than just a holiday, but also to let us know they would cancel if they wanted. We didnt want them too, it was a bit if light in a very dark time.

My parents were a bit sad that they were not there, but delighted my sis and her hubby got the day that THEY wanted.

I would say do what you and your H2B want to do, and if you feel you have to, have some sort of party at a later date. Its YOUR days, no one elses x