Sorting out my life - Part 2!

copperjar

Thanks guys
I dragged myself there, was tough but hopefully I'm back on the fitness train now! Didn't do quite as much as usual, I'm so tired (I must wake up 4 or 5 times during the night these days), but I'm glad I went.

Haven't done much about the work situation, apart from book my interview slot. Its very bizarre. Because the area is so big and there's 40 of us going for 15 jobs, they're interviewing over 6 days in 6 different locations. So I'm 2pm on March 1st - the last day and so far the last person :eek: The panel will be so sick of hearing the same answers and presentations by the time its my turn. Oh well.
Tried to start preparing for it all today but I'm struggling a bit due to lack of motivation. Need a kick to get started I think.

Also I need to work out whether I could travel to another part of the County, just to increase the number of posts available to me. The problem is, all other locations would take 75-90 mins to get to and be over 100 mile round trip. It seems crazy preferencing for a job so far away...

Blah blah, worry worry, I'm boring myself silly!! (sorry to anyone actually reading this nonesense!).

Wordsmith

Well done for going to the gym. Although now I hope that it was not the thought that you could turn out like me that scared you into going. I wish it could scare me into going.

Re the job, don't worry about what everyone else will be saying. Just think about what you say and how you say it. Why are you lacking motivation to prepare? Is it because you don't want the job? Or because you are afraid of not impressing the interviewers? Or because you are jaded from thinking about it so much? Do you know the format of the interview, or are you preparing blind? Clear your head to get a starting point.

Jobs further away sound hard work. Only you know whether you would be prepared for all that travelling. Have you got time to do the journeys to see what they'd be like and imagine doing them day after day? What's the prospect of moving nearer to the job if you got one elsewhere?

So many questions! Sorry. It would be more helpful if I gave you some answers. I guess only time will do that. Good luck.

jwil

Wordsmith wrote: »

I hope that it was not the thought that you could turn out like me that scared you into going. I wish it could scare me into going.

Lol wordsmith - I have the same problem exactly. I need to get myself sorted, but have seriously no motivation at the moment.

jwil

I wouldn't worry about what everyone else is saying either copperjar, I sat on an interview panel recently, and we asked everyone the same questions, and everyone gave different answers. It's all coming from their own perspective - none of them were wrong, it was just different ways of looking at things. It was really interesting actually!

startagain_2

By the time you read this you will have gone to work, I know...

A word of caution.. don't make yourself go to the gym if you are tired, you could hurt yourself. It is OK as a pick me up if you are flagging a bit but not if you are genuinely exhausted.

Just be you for the interview, don't worry about other people and their answers. It is about getting the best person for the job and you will either be that person, or not. Simples..

It is a tough time for you, lots has been going on but just imagine how good it will feel to be on the other side of it? You have got a couple of weeks until the interview, what about a treat for yourself this weekend and stop beating yourself up over stuff?
I know, I am a good one to talk....

One day to the weekend, it is Friday eve today as Chris Evans puts it... Chill, feet up and tell yourself that it is all going to work out...

Hugs

SA

copperjar

I scared myself into going - the clothes are starting to get a bit tight again! I do love a bit of comfort eating though....

Wordsmith wrote: »

Why are you lacking motivation to prepare? Is it because you don't want the job?

That's part of it, yes. Especially the more I hear about the job and the plans for my department in the future. I'll have to abandon my values and principles if I get the job!

Wordsmith wrote: »

Or because you are afraid of not impressing the interviewers?

That's another part of it. Its irrational, especially when I don't think all that much of the people interviewing and don't even really want the job, but I'm really anxious that I'll make a fool of myself.

Wordsmith wrote: »

Or because you are jaded from thinking about it so much?

Yup, that as well!

Wordsmith wrote: »

Do you know the format of the interview, or are you preparing blind? Clear your head to get a starting point.

I do pretty much know the format, I can make good predictions on what will be asked, I just can't muster up any enthusiasm! I guess I'm still pretending its a long way off, but its actually 2 weeks! Will make a start this weekend.

No gym tonight (thanks SA - I took your advice ) - my foot is really hurting, think I need some new trainers. I've been a bit of a slob this week, eating junk and no exercise and I've got a takeaway booked with a friend tomorrow. Last blow out then back to the healthy eating. Saw the smoking nurse again today, she treats me like I'm 16 with her over enthusiastic praise but its nice to get a pat on the back And I'm still smoke free. Definitely think I've cracked it this time.

Still going strong on the MSE front, I'm really proud of how much I've paid off my debts. No matter what happens over the next few months, at least I won't have credit card debts hanging over me.

copperjar

Well, its all change again. Been to a meeting today about the restructure and there will be other opportunities for me, although it will involve taking a big step back. I'm so paranoid at the moment I daren't even write on here what its all about (we were threatened with disciplinary if it gets out!), but the anxiety of being jobless in June has at least been given some respite - I might well have a few more months. So I'm going to concentrate on still paying my debts, the more I can get paid off, the better for my long term future (obviously!).


Got my monthly treat (back massage!) coming up next week...boy do I need it!

copperjar

This is the first weekend in a couple of weeks where I've had nothing planned. Unfortunately I woke up really early (postman at the door!) so the overdue long sleep-in didn't happen. I've been dwelling/obsessing/stressing for much of the day for no apparent reason which has been slightly annoying but I've given myself a good talking to and feel much better now.

Have been to the gym and also ordered a new suit for interviews (*gulp*) - hope it fits! I seem to be able to treat myself to stuff now without panicking about how much money I've spent/telling myself I don't deserve it while still paying quite a bit towards my debts. I really don't know where all my money used to go! I'm sure this must be the only DFW diary where treating yourself is seen as an achievement!

copperjar

Enjoyed a lovely long lie in this morning. Its amazing how much better you feel after a good nights sleep, I've really got to sort my sleep pattern out. Any tips on how to get to sleep? On the whole I'm okay once I've dropped off, its the getting to sleep that's the problem.

Have been reading a book about getting the most out of life and reducing stress/anxiety and one of the exercises involves completing a daily activities diary. Its pretty much like a school timetable, the day is broken down into hours and you have to record what you did for each hour (even sleeping!) and then grade each hour out of 10 for Pleasure and Mastery (how far each activity was an achievement). I've not done it yet but I suspect very strongly that the pleasure grade throughout the day will be pretty low! Just thinking about today, all I've got planned to do is weekly food shop, washing, cleaning the house and getting my application form for the jobs done. None of them sound very pleasurable to me! :rotfl:

So all of that brings me back to finding some new hobbies and activities that I can get involved in, and thinking about how I spend my time when I've not got anything specific plannned. Chilling out doing nothing is fine, but maybe not 7 nights a week!

copperjar

I've had a good couple of days, with even a bit of pleasure thrown in! Feeling really motivated again, hopefully I can stay in this mood and mindset for a bit longer this time!

Been to the gym tonight and pushed myself quite hard, I'm definitely getting much fitter even if the bloody weight isn't coming off. I seem to have accidently gained 2lb this week! Oops. Still, I have had a few treats so shouldn't be too surprised. And I've also got a big box of chocolates to eat now as well..believe it or not but I got a valentines card and pressie yesterday Really sweet but slightly problematic because
a) wrong gender
b) wrong age
c) I'm his manager!
So pretty inappropriate all round :eek:

Did the first part of the selection process for the jobs today - online personality test! Its hard not to double guess what they are looking for and fill in the answers accordingly, but I was just honest and if I'm not what they want, then so be it. Interview 2 weeks today and I've also got my presentation to prepare. Starting to get scary now. We're all so stressed out I think I'm starting to wear my friend and would be business partner down. Got to stop because she's my best friend and I don't want to lose her by being insecure and stressy when she's going through exactly the same thing. Sigh.

Got my massage tomorrow. So looking forward to it - I'm definitely enjoying this treat malarky!