Sorting out my life - Part 2!

copperjar

After 3....I'm not getting a cold, I'm not getting a cold..... (actually, I really am getting a cold, feel dead rough!)

WonkeyDonkey - welcome to the thread. Really lovely to see new people popping in. When I worked out my total debt amount, it did send me into a bit of a spin, but it was actually quite liberating. I've always hidden my debts, even from myself, so finally working it all out and seeing it in black and white has helped me keep focused on what I'm trying to do. That's also why I keep it all on view in my signature. I used to deceive myself - if I overspent and went OD, I'd do a 0% balance transfer to one of the credit cards. That way it was out of sight and I could pretend it wasn't happening! Crazy I know. Are you thinking of keeping a diary on here? I have to say its helping me - although I'm a tad embarassed about some of the non debt posts I've made! But you do get a real sense of achievement when paying an extra little bit off the CCs or working out your monthly payments. Whenever I make a bit of money, I can't wait to come and put it on here and share it.

Thanks Liz - how are you doing?

Iwantahome - feel a bit blurgh today. Should you exercise when ill or am I just making excuses?!! I'm nearing my first milestone with the debts with getting the Virgin card paid off. It will definitely be gone after the next payday, if I can get more paid between now and the end of the month, half of next payday's money can then go towards Santander - so that's the aim.

Well, I'd better get going. Working from home this morning but have to head out for a meeting now. Its so hard to get motivated workwise and I'm not sleeping well at the moment. Too much chaos running round in my head! Think I just need to get this week over and done with.

iwantahome

Hope you feeling better today. Personally wouldn't go overboard when ill. Maybe just walk or go on the bike or for a swim, but no running, everyone has different rules on this though. Does getting things off your chest help with sleeping? You know we are here reading (maybe not always when you are online) and a problem shared is not a problem halved in my mind but is definitely a problem eased. Or maybe try writing stuff down in a notebook to stop it running round your head and let you sleep? And don't be embarrassed about the non-debt threads, your diary would be quite boring and nobody would get to know anything about you if it was simply a list of your income/outgoings each day.

Hope you enjoy your weekend, and get out socialising a bit, for free or as cheap as possible hopefully.

copperjar

Thanks iwantahome. I haven't done any exercise since the gym on Tuesday and just can't shake this sore throat. Drugs, icecream, nothing works! Think I might just be a bit run down, really looking forward to a LONG lie in tomorrow.

It definitely helps to get things out and off my chest, my poor friends must be sick to the back teeth of me, but tonight I've had a breakthrough. It.doesn't.matter! All the obsessing, stressing, trying to get questions answered acheives nothing. Looking back through my diary, there's so much about the ex - I wasn't moving forward at all because I still felt so guilty about everything, things which weren't actually my fault! And being a natural worrier, I was stressing on HER behalf about her finances, her job, her family. And its just not my concern any more. Someone else can do the worrying now instead.

Me and my work colleague were also very honest with each other last night about the whole job/business stuff and we really want to make a go of setting up on our own. Although we've talked about it (a lot!!), we hadn't actually done anything about it - just a few lists and hours and hours of talking! We phoned Yorkshire BusinessLink today and have a starter pack winging its way to us, we're getting together next week to go through it and start our proper planning. We can't just wait for things to happen to us - we need to take control! I never thought redundancy (or the threat of it) would feel so personal. I've worked for NYCC for 10 years, worked my way up and now have a pretty decent management job. But it feels like I'm basically being told I'm not wanted or needed. Its like being rejected. Every logical cell in your brain tells you not to take it personally - but that's what we've both done and consequently we've just been wallowing! I do still have a slight worry that one of us might get the promotion in the restructure or we'll not get our redundancy - but I think that might be more down to my tendancy to fret more than anything!

Don't have much planned this weekend. Going to sort a few things out in the house and get to the gym (if I'm feeling better). Also plan to get in contact with some old friends I've neglected lately. And stay positive. That's the main thing!

LittleLiz101

Hi Copperjar

Sorry to hear you still aren't feeling 100%. Forget about the gym this weekend and rest and take some you time. Sounds like you may be a bit run down which is completely understandable considering everything you have had going on recently.

Really excited for you re starting your own business. Sounds like you have already taken control. Here's to bigger and better things for you in 2011.

Enjoy your lie in

Liz

elaine12022

Hi Copper jar

Just want to say I think you're doing amazing, on all fronts. :j

the business venture idea sounds really exciting. :T I hope neither of you get another CC job so you can follow your hearts & your own creativity.

If you like your takeaways and fancy having a go at your own you might want to treat yourself to 'the takeaway secret' book, I read about it on these forums & got it for my OH (from Amazon, less than a fiver) for Christmas & he's really enjoyed experimenting with some of the recipes ( we have adapted some of them, based on what we've got in the house & food intolerances). In fact, I had sweet & sour sauce from the chippy last night & it wasn't as nice as the one hubby had made!

and finally, remember you're a Human being,not a human D oing, you don't have to rush round like a mad thing all the time ; - Take time to smell the roses (when they come out )

chevalier

hi there

Well what can i say but OOPS!:o:o

I am so sorry for assuming you were a bloke! But even so it doesn't make the idea of doing surveys necessarily a bad thing!

I have just discovered crowdology, there payout is only £4 (though if you put it into paypal you lose a bit with fees), so they might be a good one to have a go ref you challenges.

I think a lot of us can't have a much worse 2011 than 2010, so you go for it.

Oh and I wouldn't do any running with a cold, but maybe the weights? But once you are better then GO TO THE GYM!
chev

startagain_2

Good Morning copperjar,

I do hope that you don't wake up this morning with a cold but there is so much about at the moment it could well have struck.

When you write about your past, obsessing about your ex's problems rather than your own, I have learnt that it is called "taking ownership of other peoples problems" and it is a way of avoiding dealing with your own stuff. Two years of psychology counselling are actually beginning to sink in.... At least you have recognised that you were doing it and now just think of all the time you have got to plan your new business venture.

I too, took my redundancy very personally last year even though a large number of us got the bullet. I think when you have worked very hard to establish yourself in a job it is a severe blow when that ends. Just think of it as a chance to enter a new phase of your life.
Seven months on I actually look back and enjoy the good memories rather than feel bitter which I was inclined to do at the time. I now have the time and energy to do different things rather than feel married to my job.

Have a good weekend - despite the rotten weather, keep dry and warm and keep the cold bug under control...

SA

jwil

Hope you feel better today copperjar, have a good weekend!

copperjar

Thanks for all the comments guys I promise you'll I'll get out of this funk soon! I think I'm getting there actually - its just a matter of focusing on one thing at a time rather than run around (physically or just in my head!) trying to do everything at once and end up getting nowhere with anything!

I've smoked this last week which I'm really mad with myself about. Had been doing so well, 2 months without, so I need to pack that in right away and get back on the no smoking train. Its so easy to fall back into bad habits. Wasn't going to mention it on here because its been a pretty epic fail, but this is my diary, warts and all, so writing it down should shame me into stopping again!!

Plans for today: tidy up and have a bit of a clear out of non eBayable junk, get the weights out and actually use them, plan some healthy menus for next week. And finally, treat myself to something nice

iwantahome

The smoking isn't an epic fail, it's just a bump in the road. You've had a lot going through your mind and can't focus on everything all at once.

The business plan sounds great, sounds like you are making good progress towards that and hopefully it will all work out in your favour.

Exercising isn't boding well for me today. Made a conscious decision not to do any today, tomorrow will be a run day.

Let us know what the treat is. Is this your monthly treat thing kicking off?