Advice Needed Re Elderley Next Door Neighbour

lil_me

Thanks for confirming that wolfehouse I thought that was the case as when we were concerned over a lady who lived near by a long time ago a friend who is a nurse said to contact her GP, unfortunately as there is 4 in the area which people use (none in the village itself) took a few calls but eventually contacted them and they did a home visit and refered her to SS immediately.

Also forgot to say good luck with the new arrival, and please let us know how you get on, when I am old I hope my neighbours are so caring

livinginhope

Hi joanne,have you tried getting 'invited in' so you could assess the situation better,then you could report your findings?
She definately sounds like she needs carers going in to wash,dress and feed her,also to do some housework.
You need to contact her GP and social services again and be forceful,it is against human rights to live in this situation and they have a duty of care to her.I know this sounds harsh,but I would stress to them that if the worst should happen and she passed away,THEY would be ultimately responsable.
I think I would also threaten to highlight her plight to the local paper and let everyone see how the authorities treat their elderly residents.
Good luck with the baby,you really don't need this worry at the moment,you are doing your best.

Dora_the_Explorer_5

I think I would also threaten to highlight her plight to the local paper and let everyone see how the authorities treat their elderly residents

I'm sure you mean well, but please have some respect for an elderly persons dignity. She's entitled to help if it's needed, and to privacy and dignity.

lamb7994

Hi

I work for Help The Aged as a charity shop manager and the best people to contact is our Senior Line which is a Free impartial and confidential advice line for older people and their carers they can be contacted on:

0808-800-6565

It is open 9am - 4pm Monday wednesday to Friday
and 9am - 3pm on Tuesdays


Good luck


James

jen_jen_2

you may get more of a response from an emergency service, perhaps its worth asking the fire service out to fit smoke alarms (do a fire safety check), they do this for free, if she is collecting she could be a hazard and they can refer to social services (apparently social services give a better response to an emergency service referall)

redsetter03

Haven`t got anything to add really- Just want to reitereate what others have said and congratulations on the baby news.

I too, wish there were more caring people around such as yourselves.

Keep us informed, and best of luck with the authorities.

redsetterx

Savvy_Sue

elaine373 wrote:

Its a shame that there isnt a scheme where people could adopt/help elderly people who have no family. I lost my mum two years ago and whilst no-one will take her place i find myself looking at elderly ladies in tesco`s and thinking i wonder if they have got any-one who pops in. My children would love to visit a `Granny`This probably sounds crazy and obviously any-one interested would have to be checked by ss. i think you are a great neighbour and i wish you well with your new baby.

I think there is such a scheme, possibly run by Help the Aged or Age Concern. Certainly worth contacting both to see if they need volunteers at times you could be free.

dilanroj

ive been looking out for my elderly, fiercely independent neighbour for last couple of years. Fortunately, there are good neighbours all around cos it does take a lot of time and energy. Best suggestion above was to get yourself invited in because then it may be easier to make a referral if she trusts you to do things for her, also at same time contact the gp if you can, they are usually very good.

i went through alzheimers society, even tho she is still officially undiagnosed (refuses to go to memory clinic) - they were so helpful with where to go next and even made the referral. But she does need to 'accept' the help - thats where befriending her more comes in.

we had problems with this, at first she turned away the help, with with our persuasion she now has meals on wheels every day, goes to a day centre twice a week, gets regular respite 'holidays' away from home and also has carers going in to make meals etc - sadly she has to pay for most of this! as she has a certain amount of savings - this is also something you might have to think about 'taking on' or helping her with...probably further down the line.

in our area we have something called the pensioners (or maybe elderly) advocacy service - when social services were dragging their feet i got them involved and they keep on their case, has really, really helped. they are a voluntary organisation that speak up/represent the elderly in all kinds of situations where they need support...

good luck!

LondonDiva

wolfehouse wrote:

ultimately her gp carries the responsibility (duty of care don't ya know).
my husband is a gp and he is appalled by the fact that an emergency to social services can mean a few days or weeks from the reported problem.

We are always being told to look after our neighbours. and when you do it seems you have to overcome these barriers too. good on you for perservering.

Her GP has a responsibility to look after her when she visits or from anything arising from a visit. If she has not been identified as having ongoing issues, that they have actioned the GP has nothing to do with it.

If it is raised with the GP and they make efforts to get assistance/care to her and she rejects it, there is a limit to what can be done. They may also not be able to discuss actions with you if they judge you not to have a sufficient interest. MargaretClare's point about her privacy are very valid and should inform your actions.

The 2 week wait for them to come out to see her looks as though she has been listed as 'coping' rather than urgent. The services have to prioritise between immediately neccessary intervention and what can wait a week or so. Part of the reason the services are under pressure is the difficulties in sorting people who need a visit today and those who while needing intervention can wait a week or so.

You may be concerned about her, but do you believe that she is in imminent danger today?

Please keep up highlighting the concern and I would urge you to continue to try to make contact with her. If you persist, she may be more willing to accept help from you that she may not from the official agencies.

livinginhope

Dora_the_Explorer wrote:

I'm sure you mean well, but please have some respect for an elderly persons dignity. She's entitled to help if it's needed, and to privacy and dignity.

I think you must have misunderstood,I said threaten,not actually report it to the paper.
I have to say I have the upmost respect for the elderly,afterall it was my job for a number of years,I have NEVER done anything that cause loss of respect or dignity to ANYBODY.
I agree she is entitled to help if needed and the OP thinks it is,BUT she isn't getting any help at the moment,as nothing is being done.I know how frustrating Social services can be,as said I worked for them for years,as already said I didn't say actually put it in the paper.