The Memorygirl Matrix

EssexHebridean

Crickett - Good idea above re the clothes, and making the best of yourself.

Think this through - what DO you like about yourself? Don't be hasty and say "nothing" - really think it through. For example, I hate my tummy and thighs, but I have nice eyes, shiny hair, and I have always had rather a soft spot for my arms. Equally, whilst I'm not particularly fussed about them, my large.....errrm, well let's just say that when the Calendar Girls thing comes off, a pair of Tesco Value toasted teacakes will NOT do the job! ....mean that I have a cleavage which many folk would say they would love, and also my calves look decent in a pair of heels. Think about the things your OH says he likes about you (I wonder if that will be banger related, too!) or the things you received compliments on as a child. Going from disliking your body and the way you look overnight isn't going to happen - but if you try to move forward in a mood of acceptance of the bits that are "OK" and a determination to change those that are "ugh" then you'll get somewhere.

Also, think through WHY you are bigger than you like. Is it because you eat the wrong things, eat too much, eat the leftovers off the kids plates, or snack a lot? Once you've worked out the answer to that one, you're a step further along the path as you can then see how you need to change things.

maryb

Crickett

Don't ever think you are not pretty - I saw your pic when you registered on Memorygirl's blog. Your husband sees what you can't and you might find it helpful to tell yourself that you are listening to voices that are telling you to pay no attention to what he thinks. If someone said that to you in real life you would pretty soon tell them where to get off!!

I think from what you have posted elsewhere you are a practising Catholic. I have some issues with the church and am not currently attending Mass but one thing I have always valued them for and still do, is the respect for individual humans that it preaches. You are worthwhile and beautiful, whatever size you are. By all means try and get fitter to treat your body with the love and respect it deserves, but don't allow yourself to think it is hateful

MrsMoo2U

Crickett

I second what has been said above. Now I would also go with the sentiment of finding things that you like about yourself and focusing on them. Somebody once told me I had a lovely smile, I couldn't see it at the time but then they gave me a photo of myself which even I had to admit my smile was glowing on. I printed the picture off and put it onto my fridge. Every time I got up in a grumpy feeling like s*** day I was greeted with the picture when I made my morning cuppa and it made me remember that compliment.
Underwear always makes me feel special too. So when I am in a disliking myself mood I will find my nicest set and put it on. Wear some heels put on some makeup and you will start to feel better. Concentrate on making yourself the best you can be today and your confidence will start to rise. Find an exercise regime that you do because you enjoy that not because it is for losing weight and focus on the enjoyment not the reason for starting it.
Everybody is beautiful in their own unique way, you just have to remember to look for your own uniqueness.

Firewalker

Memory_Girl wrote: »

OK - just finished my coaching call (withthe very sexy french chappie) - and for all sorts of reasons I am in a bit of a tizz.

Today I am backto work for real - and he has put me through the wringer and I now feel well and truly chastised.

Q Can you email me your to-do list

A Don't have one written yet:(

Q can you start creating your to-do lists before bed so that you get up and straight into work?

A Yes! thats a great idea

Q Have you got your book of numbers?

A ????????????????

Q Is there a file wth actual paperwork in it documenting how many people are booked on each training date?

A No - got a spreadsheet

Q Can you get everything into a file today and into your "office in a bag" - it needs to physically be with you when you are out of the office and you can't get to your laptop.

A Yes - I can do that

Q What is todays biggest problem?

A I don't know what to do - I don't know where to start!!

Q So you have followed up every offer of help and every connection the Matrix has offered you - so your training dates are now full? Yes?

A Erm (blush!!!!!!!) No, but thats a good place to start

Q Its the only place to start. Everything you ALL NEED to get where you are going in ALREADY IN THE MATRIX. You don't need to be looking elsewhere for marketing ideas - use your collective strengths - understand??

A OK

Q So you are going to create these files, post your book orders and create a Marketing folder to capture all offers of help and connections?

A Yes - right now

Q And then you are going to follow up on every connection and every referral in the next week?

A Yes

Q So have you now got a To-do list

A Yes (laughing)

Q I wll phone you at ten tonight to check that you have all the information together in one place - do you know why?

A No

Q Because until you have the habit if keeping everything together you cannot ever hand the admin of your business over to someone else to do. There someone in the matrix that would love your business - Yes?

A Yes

Q And is there someone in the Matrx who is a superseller - someone who could sell you into businesses and can make themselves succesfull too?

A I don't know

Q I do - you need to go back through all the posts and pull out and collate all your data - agreed?

A Yes

Q Talk to you at ten - click!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whew!!!! but actually he has a point - well several really. I have been so focussed on the "wedding day" of getting off benefits that I hadn't really concentrated on the "marriage" of the day-to-day running of the business.

So I'm off to rumage and to find some file dividers to get organised - then it looks lke I will have a marathon reading session ahead of me later.

TTFN

A busy and Happy

Memorygirl

Guys, just a reminder - all his came packaged in a nice, sexy voice with French accent. Because it is worth it!

Now back to teaching for me.

Firewalker

crickett1234

*sniffle* You lot are fabulous!

EssexHebridean wrote: »

Crickett - Good idea above re the clothes, and making the best of yourself.

Think this through - what DO you like about yourself? Don't be hasty and say "nothing" - really think it through. .

Hmmm... well, I have nice blue eyes. And a nose that is a triumph of genetics (everyone else in my close family have really big noses... and mine is much more button shaped!). My hair is always shiny, and I have a good haircut that suits me and is easy to style. I think thats it.

EssexHebridean wrote: »

Going from disliking your body and the way you look overnight isn't going to happen - but if you try to move forward in a mood of acceptance of the bits that are "OK" and a determination to change those that are "ugh" then you'll get somewhere..

What a great deal of sense you write here! Thanks EH

EssexHebridean wrote: »

Also, think through WHY you are bigger than you like. Is it because you eat the wrong things, eat too much, eat the leftovers off the kids plates, or snack a lot? Once you've worked out the answer to that one, you're a step further along the path as you can then see how you need to change things.

Oooooh, I have done this before! I have always been big. Always. I am never going to be a skinny minny, that is for sure. When I really started to get big was when I went to Uni and was cooking and eating for myself. I made bad food choices as a form of rebellion from my very strict parents. I escaped them and with them went my sense. I drank too much, ate too much and even started smoking. (Though I went cold turkey from the smoking when I worked out how much extra beer I could drink if i did! ) And if I am brutally honest, I am still rebelling from my parents. Even though I moved out 15 years ago and have my own life and really rarely see them. I just need to stop rebelling!!

maryb wrote: »

Crickett

Don't ever think you are not pretty - I saw your pic when you registered on Memorygirl's blog. Your husband sees what you can't and you might find it helpful to tell yourself that you are listening to voices that are telling you to pay no attention to what he thinks. If someone said that to you in real life you would pretty soon tell them where to get off!!

Thanks for the compliment Mary. That photo was taken quite a few years ago now...and i could do with losing more than I had then. :eek:It is scary really how much I need to lose. The amount in my signature is the least I need to lose. However, in the positive spirit... If I got there once.. I can get there again.

maryb wrote: »

I think from what you have posted elsewhere you are a practising Catholic. I have some issues with the church and am not currently attending Mass but one thing I have always valued them for and still do, is the respect for individual humans that it preaches. You are worthwhile and beautiful, whatever size you are. By all means try and get fitter to treat your body with the love and respect it deserves, but don't allow yourself to think it is hateful

Thank you for reminding me of this Mary. Sometimes it is the blinding glimpses of the obvious that you need! :A

cherisong wrote: »

Crickett

Concentrate on making yourself the best you can be today and your confidence will start to rise. Find an exercise regime that you do because you enjoy that not because it is for losing weight and focus on the enjoyment not the reason for starting it.
Everybody is beautiful in their own unique way, you just have to remember to look for your own uniqueness.

Thanks Cherisong. You are quite right.

*sniffle* You are still all fabulous... and I am most grateful!

oceanspirit

MG - Male voice, French accent - absolutely no chance of me even listening to what he is saying! I agree with Monsieur le Mentor that clearing your desk and writing your to do list at the end of each day is probably the most important thing you will do that day.

Hypno and Matymoo - The NHS kindly gave me a new pair of hips for my 40th birthday, one just before and one just after, so I spent the day wobbling around on a zimmer frame! I opted for no visitors except my carer and celebrated my 40th on my 41st instead! Now I am confused and have no idea how old I am (26, I think). So, my life is beginning at the age of 42 1/2.

Firewalker - loved the RSA film

robsmum - good to hear you are feeling a bit better. Yes, definitely take some time out to read the Secret. You made the right decision.

crickett1234 - beauty comes from within and your beauty shines through the posts you have made on this thread. If you have some photograhs of a time when you felt happy with the way you look, put them up on your mirror and when you look at them, tell yourself out loud how beautiful you are. You may feel a bit silly at first talking to yourself, but it does work in helping you to reprogramme your thoughts.

Thank you all for your welcome yesterday evening. Needless to say I had a fairly restless night and came up with a few more ideas and things which need to be organised before my deadline. I do feel good today that I have committed to a timescale and this time it is realistic.

Having a productive day so far ... now back to the "to do" list.

Surfbabe

JoS1972 wrote: »

Ok did anyone else read that to themsleves in a very dodgy 'ello 'ello french accent or was it just me :rotfl:?

I just have - I zhall zay zis only once!!!

hypno06

My assistant has just made me coffee and bought me a Freddo Frog.

The boy will go far :rotfl:

Surfbabe

Positive thoughts to everyone who needs them - I'm sort of coasting around these challenges - dipping in here and there - big positive step forward for me was contacting the Open Univeristy to see if I can ever finish my degree - now bear in mind that I started it in 1982 !!!! - stopped in 1990 as I couldn't afford it and then since about 2000 have made every excuse under the sun not to do anything about it!!! I've found out that I only need a maximum of 120 credits (two level 3 courses) to graduate with honours - the courses I did all those years ago still count !!!!

Football shirts - poster has gone home to everyone at school today and am taking a couple into the local leisure centre where I teach.


MG - I have some Morrisons Vouchers - we don;t collect thema t school as our nearest shop is about 30 miles away - if you can PM the address I will send them on

redsquirrel80

Surfbabe wrote: »

Positive thoughts to everyone who needs them - I'm sort of coasting around these challenges - dipping in here and there - big positive step forward for me was contacting the Open Univeristy to see if I can ever finish my degree - now bear in mind that I started it in 1982 !!!! - stopped in 1990 as I couldn't afford it and then since about 2000 have made every excuse under the sun not to do anything about it!!! I've found out that I only need a maximum of 120 credits (two level 3 courses) to graduate with honours - the courses I did all those years ago still count !!!!

Football shirts - poster has gone home to everyone at school today and am taking a couple into the local leisure centre where I teach.


MG - I have some Morrisons Vouchers - we don;t collect thema t school as our nearest shop is about 30 miles away - if you can PM the address I will send them on

Hi Surfbabe - well done for taking the step to finish your degree! I've been trying to do the same for the last ten years-ish. That's great news that you only need two more courses