Life after bankruptcy?

NorthernLas

NH - I don't know if anyone has mentioned it but when you lose anything you have to take time to grieve. Although it can be incredibly painful, it is part of life and is a neccessary part of recovery.

There are 5 stages (http://www.way2hope.org/5_stages_of_grief_and_loss.htm) and the journey is not linear more sprial with a lot of x steps forward / y steps back.

Happy Friday ... it is getting lighter in the mornings (roll on spring days with the first snowdrops, lambs and daffydown dillies) :j:j:j

NL x

startagain_2

Morning Nohope!

I am so pleased that you are sounding a little more positive and that there are a little band of us now chivvying you along. My turn now....

Not only should any old utility debts be in the BR pot but what are the other outstanding debts from the old house? Can they be chucked in?
When you have your spare time next week, what about getting yourself along to the Citizens Advice and see what they say about the debts and your income situation? You may have to make an appt so it is worth looking into that. but well worth it I would say..

I love hot cross buns, teacakes, anything with dried fruit in. Yummee! And a welcome change from tinned tomatoes, I suspect.

Sorry about the car problems - I have been there and know what a drag it is. But you seem to be dealing with it all really well.

Are you renting at the moment? Do you get on with your neighbours. I moved 18 mths ago and I live in a nice area now with elderly neighbours and they are like a little community and so friendly. I have changed though and I realise that I used to give off " stay away from me" vibes and I smile at people now and encourage a smile or a bit of chat and it is great, I recommend it.

Do something, anything out of the work world that you are living in - we have spoken about volunteering - is there anything in your area that you can go along and see or watch or take part in - for free?

Random thoughts, I know, but they are things that I have picked up over the last couple of years since BR (time has flown) and I have downsized my life big time but I am so much more settled and happy for it.

Keep chatting to us as well because we are all behind you, believe me and there is so much experience (good and bad) on this forum that you will realise that you are far from the only one in this situation. :grouphug: Slightly "oh oh" group hug for you


SA

beanielou

I drive an automatic & usually cant get a courtesey car for love nor m,oney!!
Have a good day x

Aesop

NoHope, I have never been BR, although have considered it. I HAVE been in so much debt, that had creditors calling, door knocking, letters, etc. So I fully understand all of that.

When I went on maternity leave, I had such a reduced income, and even now, money is not always there, that I ensure DH and DS are eating well, and I will just have toast, etc. So I know what you are going through, only eating limited items as that is all you can afford.

I feel for you and am here too to support you anyway I can. It is not easy, none of this is, and we don't expect it to be for you. We are here though to support you, to cheer when something good happens, to cry when you are sad, or feeling low.

We are here for advice and support, to talk rubbish with, I am good at that, or to share news, etc.

I know you sometimes pop onto 3Dogs Diary, I put stuff on there to help make money, vouchers, points, discounts, comps, etc.

I don't know if any of that would help you?

Are you allowed to do surveys while BR? I don't know the rules, but I know you probably don't feel like it, but even to join 1 or 2 small companies, like P!nec0ne, and do the odd survey, they pay £3 in Luncheon Vouchers or £3 in paypal, your choice. I use the LV for shopping, as Sainsburys and Iceland take them.

If you have a Sainsbury's near you, and have a nectar card, there is a nectar search tool bar, that earns you nectar points at the end of each month, that can help towards buying food with nectar points.

There is a survey site that pays in nectar points too, that would help towards food.

Do you go whoopsie shopping? I know when my local Sainsburys are reducing their goods, and if I time it right, can buy packs of mince, sausages, sometimes a whole chicken for a lot less than the original price. If you are on your own, you could get stuff, if you have pennies and freeze. Then it is a bit extra for you. If you use the OS thread there are lots of ideas on how to eat on a budget.

Have you tried making friends with your local butcher, if you have one? And asking for chicken carcasses? You can make stock from them. If you ask for advice on buying the cheapest cuts of meat, you can slow cook them. It doesn't matter how cheap the meat is, if you slow cook it, it breaks it down until it is edible and tasty. Lots of lovely recipes for slow cooker on OS thread.

If you have allotments near you, make friends with the people who have an allotment, and ask them for any excess veg and salad they may have at the end of the day, they would rather give it away then see it rot. It will be organic, free or maybe pennies and healthy.

Hope I haven't upset you.

ani_26

Oh my, its been busy on here today. I will do my best to reply, but i've just finished with work and i'm cream crackered. Its been a long day, and i'm at work again tomorrow, so forgive me if i fall asleep, i will eventually reply x

ani_26

NorthernLas wrote: »

NH - I don't know if anyone has mentioned it but when you lose anything you have to take time to grieve. Although it can be incredibly painful, it is part of life and is a neccessary part of recovery.

There are 5 stages (http://www.way2hope.org/5_stages_of_grief_and_loss.htm) and the journey is not linear more sprial with a lot of x steps forward / y steps back.

Happy Friday ... it is getting lighter in the mornings (roll on spring days with the first snowdrops, lambs and daffydown dillies) :j:j:j

NL x

I totally accept its a grieving process, which is maybe why i have this diary, as the only way to express the grieving. But everyone has different coping mechanisms, or say they do, and there will always be many people who say just forget it and move on. I don't think i'm doing too badly so far, on balance?


Thanks for the link, i will read when i'm less tired x



My favourite flower of all, daffodils. The most expensive bunch of flowers on earth can never hold a candle to a simple daffodil, in my eyes. Maybe i will have a spare £1 to buy a bunch in the spring, since they are relatively cheap, but the pleasure gained is immense. I wish i still had my garden, but no garden now, means less work. Autumn is still my favourite season. It always has been, since my school days.


Nohope x

savingwannabe

There you are before next year you can save for a little container and plant some bulbs so from now on you will always have daffodils with you. Goodnight my friend.

ani_26

beanielou wrote: »

I drive an automatic & usually cant get a courtesey car for love nor m,oney!!
Have a good day x

Typical hey? they said you can have a car, but we only have an automatic, lol So i blagged it somewhat, as it was a very long walk back. I'm not looking forward to driving home from work on sunday, though, along a motorway, in the dark, with lots ? of snow? That should be fun / ny. Mind you, probably not as much fun as driving along a motorway minus two wheel bolts.


I hope you had a good day x

NorthernLas

NH - The sales are on in the garden centres, buy yourself a ceramic pot for £1 and some minature narcissi (like Tete a Tete). I'll price them up for you and report back!

NL x

p.s. I have no need for a reply, but delighted if you have time to do so

ani_26

savingwannabe wrote: »

There you are before next year you can save for a little container and plant some bulbs so from now on you will always have daffodils with you. Goodnight my friend.

Eeee, you make me laugh, sw x


See if i can survive january, first.


I've just thought, i should have an affiliation with spring as i was born on easter saturday. Saturdays child works hard for a living, hmmmm..............

Maybe thats why i generally like springtime flowers.