Wondering how I'll pay my mortgage

shop-to-drop

Do they pay mortgage interest when the mortgage is jointly in the Ex's name, who works and owns a second property??? AMAZING!

MaggieD

AnxiousMum wrote: »

No doubt I'll be lambasted....but hey ho - here goes.

You've been on benefits for ten years, had your mortgage interest paid for ten years, have undertaken studies obviously on a 'whim' seeing as you knew nothing about the job and how it would benefit you afterwards. You have not sought legal advice on the child support/payment contributions towards your mortgage - which means that another adult will also benefit from the equity in the house at taxpayers expense, even though he has another house with his new wife and evades child support.

I'm not slamming you as a single mum - been there done that. In order to make ends meet, I had to sell my home, move a distance away from my job to get cheaper housing which involved more commute times. However, I always ensured that the ex contributed child support as our CHILDREN ARE ENTITLED TO IT and the benefits that come of being supported by BOTH PARENTS.

You now had the opportunity to take a job - but because it wasn't PERFECT, and didn't provide you with a high income, you have turned down.

You will now likely be sanctioned by JSA - and not be eligible for JSA benefits. Surely when you have signed on, you have informed them of applying for this job?

If you cannot afford to live where you are - you need to look at moving to what you can afford, accept a job offer so you have some income, and start living within your means. You obviously don't want to hear this - there are several questions throughout this thread that you refuse to answer.

You mention the added cost of child care and after school clubs - your children are more than old enough to be at home for a half hour or so before you get home from your school hours job, it's not like they are toddlers anymore.

It's been recommended several times in the thread that you seek legal advice - have you done this with a solicitor to see what you can do re the house situation?

Nobody on here has been unhelpful - unfortunately, some posters create a post hoping for a particular answer, and when that is not received, we are all 'slamming single mums' or however you referred to it. Many of us have been in your very position, and have gotten past it. It's not easy all of the time, but nobody is going to offer an inexperienced person a high paid job just because they wish to live beyond their means. But.....just in case they do - please share the employer information on here, as many of us would love to work for them!

Another Daily Mail reader let loose.

I did not take my studies out 'on a whim' what a ridiculous unfounded statement.

I'd like to know how I'd 'ensure' my ex pays maintenance? If letting CSA know all the details isn't going to get him to come forth what am I to? Steal from him? Love to know the answer to this.

The job was far from PERFECT - 'just because it didn't pay a high income' HA it was the minimum wage, you make out I'm after a 50 grand job.

I don't see how I'm going to be sanctioned as the job I applied for I didn't get. There's no reason for the jobcentre to know that I was offered another unsuitable position.

Living within my means? That would be a bedsit then.

I sense a large amount of bitterness and resentment from you - may I suggest you don't offer your 'advice' to any other vulnerable groups of people, unlike myself, some of them might actually believe what you're saying.

MaggieD

TOBRUK wrote: »

Forgive me if I'm wrong but you say that your ex has a wife, if so you are divorced - was there any settlement in the divorce regarding the house etc?

we weren't married

Oldernotwiser

MaggieD wrote: »

Ok, so you think I should have accepted a position that I:

a) Did not apply for
b) Was working in a field I have no experience nor desire to work in
c) Did not pay enough to cover my mortgage

Not to mention my recent bereavement.

And how would the JCP know?

They were presumably desperate to get someone for the start of term and they must have thought that you were capable of doing the job. TAs have to be flexible and be prepared to take on all sorts of tasks, whether they have experience of them or not and it may well have been noted that you were not prepared to do this.

You said the salary did cover your current IO mortgage payments and with £90 a week spare, although you haven't said how much extra your capital repayment would be and how much of a gap there is between the two amounts.

I really think that you shouldn't consider being untruthful with the JCP as these things have a habit of catching people out.

Hammyman

MaggieD wrote: »

Ok, so you think I should have accepted a position that I:

a) Did not apply for
b) Was working in a field I have no experience nor desire to work in
c) Did not pay enough to cover my mortgage

Not to mention my recent bereavement.

And how would the JCP know?

Yes you should have - you have an agreement with the DWP which you're breaking by not accepting the job. You can only pick and choose for the first 6 months of a claim. After 6 months you are expected to take any work offered. You've been making excuses not to work for a decade.

Anyway, as you've decided not to take it, your mortgage interest payments will be stopping soon so if I were you, I'd start looking for somewhere else to live - this is the reality of being in the corner you've deliberately put yourself in.

AnxiousMum

MaggieD wrote: »

Another Daily Mail reader let loose.

I did not take my studies out 'on a whim' what a ridiculous unfounded statement.

I'd like to know how I'd 'ensure' my ex pays maintenance? If letting CSA know all the details isn't going to get him to come forth what am I to? Steal from him? Love to know the answer to this.

The job was far from PERFECT - 'just because it didn't pay a high income' HA it was the minimum wage, you make out I'm after a 50 grand job.

I don't see how I'm going to be sanctioned as the job I applied for I didn't get. There's no reason for the jobcentre to know that I was offered another unsuitable position.

Living within my means? That would be a bedsit then.

I sense a large amount of bitterness and resentment from you - may I suggest you don't offer your 'advice' to any other vulnerable groups of people, unlike myself, some of them might actually believe what you're saying.

Never bought the Daily Mail actually - so sorry!

Employers do report to JSA on jobs offered and whether accepted/refused....not all...but alot do.

No bitterness, no resentment.....well, not from me. Actually, posts such as your own fill me with gratitude that I had a different outlook on what I wanted to progress to as a single mum, and proud of the way I took whatever was going workwise and got myself into a far better situation. I do sense however, bitterness and resentment from you that you have been given advice by many people, but it's not what you want to hear.

I was expecting a lambasting for my straight forward post, but appears you are the only one who has objected as others seem to have liked it and in agreement with some if not all of it.

A TA's job is determined by the students enrolled in the particular school. While you might have someone with a literacy learning disorder one term.....that child may move schools and next term, you'd have a student who was autistic. You cannot pick and choose your students, just as a teacher has to take what class and students they are assigned. You really didn't give much thought to the qualification you received did you?

MaggieD

No, you're completley right. You know me far more than I do.

I forgot to mention my millionaire husband, yacht and swiss bank account too - should I mention that to the JCP? If only I had your insight..

Oldernotwiser

MaggieD wrote: »

No, you're completley right. You know me far more than I do.

I forgot to mention my millionaire husband, yacht and swiss bank account too - should I mention that to the JCP? If only I had your insight..

It's not a question of insight but of doing things by the rules.

The fact that you have now moved from IS to JSA isn't just a change of benefit name but a complete change of outlook. When you were on IS there was no pressure for you to get a job and you used (as I'm sure you know) to be able to stay on it until the youngest child is 16.

To claim JSA you need to be available for and actively seeking work and, if you're not your claim will be stopped. At present you can just about get away with applying for jobs covering school hours (although, given the ages of your children, this won't be the case for much longer).

School hours jobs are like gold dust and you have just turned down one of these precious commodities, despite the fact that you would have been about £400 per month better off! You now don't seem to understand that you either have to lie to the JSA or risk losing your JSA and that your mortgage interest won't be paid for very much longer.

People are getting exasperated with you because you don't seem to realise the seriousness of your position and you seem to think that life will just drift on as it has for the last 10 years and, trust me, it won't!

PS. You asked how the JCP would know about your being offered this job. I think the fact that your Lone Parent Adviser knows you were offered it and did a better off calculation regarding it, might just be the way, don't you?

TOBRUK

MaggieD wrote: »

No, you're completley right. You know me far more than I do.

I forgot to mention my millionaire husband, yacht and swiss bank account too - should I mention that to the JCP? If only I had your insight..

I'm sorry but this is uncalled for when people here have really tried to help and advise and whatever (it seems to me) is suggested is thrown aside somehow.

I do sympathise with your situation however you are not helping yourself and I'm really sorry that you are taking things the wrong way.

Many of us have told you that whether you have a job or not that the SMI payments will stop altogether if you are on jobseekers allowance - reality!

You were lucky to be offered another job although it wasn't the original job you were trying for - especially in education as many will be losing their jobs in many areas because of school budget cuts! They obviously thought you were qualified for the job otherwise would not have offered it, and if you weren't feeling confident they surely would have given some help and support.

Sorry, I don't really know what else to say ... and whatever I do say is probably not welcome ... I'm tired now.

blue_monkey_2

My mum and dad had a house together and then left my mum, because he did not 'want' to pay anything to my mum he had to give up his 'share' of the house in exchange for maintenaince not being paid. There were conditions attached to it (such as her not being able to get remarried). However, the mortgage still needed to be paid and mum paid a smaller amount until she was able to work longer hours and then paid slightly more to clear the arrears. Because the arrangement was done by solicitors they did not needed written permission as such from my dad, this came via solicitors.

At the moment you will get Legal Aid so get it sorted now but as you have a property they will put a charge on it to pay for the Legal Aid.

When the eldest was 18 mum had to get him to sign a letter - given by the bank - to say he was handing it over to her and coming off the title deeds. He was difficult about it but it was a stop at the solicitors with ID and £5 charge for them signing the paperwork.

You said your house had equity so why not sell the house, rent somewhere else and then when the money almost runs out (6k), claim LHA.

Surely this would be the best and most sensible option all around, and then it does not matter how much you earn and you can do the job you have trained to do.

Also to add that you can get it drawn up in the legal documents that a lump sum of the payment from the sale of the house (if it is 10 years worth then this could be all of it if he has paiud nothing in that time) will be payment for the childrens maintenaince too.

Good luck.