MSE Parents Club Part 14

jillie1974

aww (((hugs))) kitkat.

i think most of us on here have had issues with OH/DH at some point over how little they help or dont understand how hard looking after a baby is.

my DH is much better with Kian now he can 'do things' with him as opposed to when he was small and only ate/pood/slept... but i needed a 'chat' and me in tears before he realised how much i needed him to help

kitkat5566

Thanks Cafc, your a star

I will defo say what you said, think everythings just got to me today as I popped into work and colleagues kept asking who was doing what and I kept saying me.. .and that it hit me.. I am doing !!!!!!! everything. I feel a bit annoyed at myself as I feel so tired... but T is sleeping from 11pm until 9am at the mo so a super sleeper, so why am I so tired... Think I am actually glad OH isnt home until late as it gives me chance to just chill out.

He is going away with work, I think its training although I didn't really listen LOL.

Nothing from the doc/ HV about early teething, they keep looking at the white spots in his mouth saying its milk... even I know its not jeffin milk!! I still do think there is some type of allergict reaction going on, I shall try the infacol they prescribed, even though I have basically used it every feed for weeks, at least I can get it free now!! I felt awful today taking him into my work as everyone kept saying 'he's got a rash on his face' and looking at me as though I was doing something wrong, yes I know he has a rash! Plus when I fed him he kept crying when I was burping him, everyone kept looking at me as though I was knocking him about, I promise you I wasnt he just gets so uncomfortable when being burped. Grrr!!

r.mac_2

ss - I'm free *said in 1970's voice*

searching_me

:hello: you beautiful lot of parents and babies x

ladybirdintheuk

Kitkat - calming down slightly, it is completely normal for dad to take longer to adjust into his role than it does for mum. Not that it makes it ok, but I think we have all been there. He does need to come to terms with the fact that now he is a dad he has to put his son first, and you really do need to call him on it tbh. (no other !!!!!! is going to )

I'm sure everyone else will have suggestions, but even now I find that making sure DH knows exactly what we've been up to all day it helps. Partly because a lot of the household stuff that I DO do is things he wouldn't notice (he isn't the kind of person to notice that the inside of the fridge is no longer sticky, or whatever!) and also that if I have spent most of the day cuddling a poorly baby and haven't had time to even get myself lunch he knows that too. He never noticed how time-consuming Izzy is until I started pointing it out to him. I also point out if I am having a nap when she does that I am doing it BECAUSE we were up for xxxx amount of time in the night. It might sound patronising (might sound it to him too!), but if you don't tell him he won't know

Oh, and I find choices work too - do you want to cook tea while I'm giving Izzy her bath or do you want to do bathtime while I cook. (That WHILE is quite important too - he doesn't always grasp the importance of the fact that saying he will do something means he has to do it today )

Evansangel

Forgot to say, Lilys hair is so long now we have to brush it to the side otherwise it gets in her eyes!

I refuse to cut it though

kitkat5566

Thanks everyone feel a bit awful posting my rant on here but I just needed to talk to someone, and I really dont know anyone around here and cba to talk to family, feel better just talking. Hopefully its just a stage with him starting a new job.


Kindof; is the comfort milk any good? I did think about trying that.

EDIT: doc just prescribed infacol, although T has basically been drinking it for weeks, we actually switched to detinox (i think) this week for a change, that doesnt seem too bad but we have to burp him more often as the air bubbles get too big

ladybirdintheuk

EA I seriously need to cut Izzys fringe, but last time I did it too short and she looked like something out of Mork and Mindy :rotfl:. She absolutely refuses to keep hair clips in though, so she is going to have to have a fringe until she is big enough to decide she doesn't want one. (and big enough to put up with growing it out!)

Kitkat don't worry, ranting is what we are here for. A problem shared is a problem halved and all that

searching_me

couldnt possibly catch up so lots of ((hugs)) :coffee:'s and biccie .. and x

jillie1974

echo what ladybird said.

when i finally spoke to DH he said that he loved Kian very much but was scared of doing anything with him. also i think i had my nesting instincts after i had kian so was like a maniac for about 4 weeks tidying all the itme and cleaning etc.
although as older posters know, we did have a very hard time of it after Kian arrived so i made allowances for DH but if we have no2 he will not have the same

once a month or so we have a big clean so i just need to keep on top of it most days. its made things a lot easier... although i have an ironing mountain that needs doing next week when DH has the week off