MSE Parents Club Part 14

SugarSpun

GISI I would be :mad: at that too. When I was veggie I didn't mind sharing utensils etc but I had a vegan housemate who would be outraged if someone put a yogurt pot on her fridge shelf and had a full kitchen set nobody else was allowed to use.

ladybirdintheuk

Afternoon all. I've not caught up on anything since the weeekend, so I hope you are all ok We've just come home from playgroup, where we discussed extended breastfeeding, made sauasage rolls, met the local police man and also Izzy played nicely without fighting with anyone

EA/GISI/Em/anyone else I've missed - are we still meeting up next week, and if so where! Please can someone PM me if anything changes, as I will be around on-and-off over the weekend, but I don't normally get to pop in on work days. (too busy trying to get bingoport vouchers and swagbucks... and eat and boring stuff like that too )

How is everyone?

got-it-spend-it

I'm not normally that precious about things, SS, and OH will have meat in takeaways, on a pizza etc. It's just that I feel like she did it because I wasn't here.....but I am over-reacting really!

SugarSpun

Free children's books - just pay postage.

GISI, I can see why that would annoy you. MILs should not do stuff when you're out that they wouldn't when you're there. And nor should anyone else.

Wonderful response Weezl

xmaslolly76

Afternoon ladies thought i would check in, i just took bubs and babs for their injections it was only supposed to be bubs but she did lexi too to save me the journey next week. Bubs was ever so brave he didnt make a peep just gave the nurse and evil look but he smiled again once he got a lollypop. Lexi screamed her head off but its not suprising the amount of needles she has had stuck in her since birth poor thing.

Gisi I wouldnt be happy either the least she could have done was ask first instead of going behind your back x

got-it-spend-it

Glad your two littlies are okay after the jabs, Xmas.

Have you tried this site before, SS? Looks similar to approved foods.

ladybirdintheuk

CFAC I've just read back and am fuming on your behalf. What a thing to say to someone

got-it-spend-it

ladybirdintheuk wrote: »

Afternoon all. I've not caught up on anything since the weeekend, so I hope you are all ok We've just come home from playgroup, where we discussed extended breastfeeding, made sauasage rolls, met the local police man and also Izzy played nicely without fighting with anyone

EA/GISI/Em/anyone else I've missed - are we still meeting up next week, and if so where! Please can someone PM me if anything changes, as I will be around on-and-off over the weekend, but I don't normally get to pop in on work days. (too busy trying to get bingoport vouchers and swagbucks... and eat and boring stuff like that too )

How is everyone?

I am totally still up for it- next Thursday. I don't mind about location, Fareham might be good as it is in the middle, but if travel is a problem for EA and Lily then I am happy to do Portsmouth. Soft play would probably be a good option....

ladybirdintheuk

Soft play sounds good to me and I'll be driving so I cango wherever is easiest

r.mac_2

CAFCGirl wrote: »

It wasnt so much that, they just ganged up on me LOL

Please?????????????
I'm dying here for evil people!

See this is what I mean about you lot, you're all so lovely and I know would never dream of coming out with the carp I got off the mummy nazis earlier.....

Anyway in short to explain (I did type this all out earlier but before I could copy whilst it was posting I got the delightful Internet Explorer is being a twonk message)

So we go to baby massage (make an effort thinks I)
Only 4 there inc me, with the only boy (which was sad as there was only 1 other boy first time as well)

Anyway........... the bl**ding woman running it EYP we'll call her, asks me in front of everyone why I wasnt there last week..
Response
"Oh well my husband works shifts and he doesnt get much time with L, and as it was his day off I wanted them to have the time together and I didnt know if he would be ok to come along. I tried phoning to check but noone answered. Last time you said it was ok if we had to miss a week because we go back over the previous week at the start so I thought it would be ok"

EYP
"Well if you had been here last week we wouldnt HAVE to go back over it, because everyone else here had attended"

*Note noone jumps in to say "oh well I wouldnt mind going back over it*

Then Pink Mummy 1 pipes up
"I dont know about anyone else but I wouldnt feel comfortable with your husband here as last week we had all the babies naked for the session, and I wouldnt like my daughter being naked around strange men, and she loved having the freedom last time so.........."

*Note my husband is not a raging !!!!! attending baby massage so he can groom them, he was going to go so that he could learn how to bond better with his son*

Pink Mummy 2
"Oh I hadnt thought of that, good point... because you never know do you"

Follow everyone staring at me....

Before I could blurt out any kind of response EYP gets started, and it was so uncomfortable, none of them would talk to me, I tried joining in the conversation but they'd just start talking about things they buy for their girls, dresses and the like...

So I just concentrated on L, desperately trying not to cry, and waited for them all to leave before me.

Spoke to some woman on the desk about my unreturned messages for the HV to come have her chat about weaning because we're away, and I got told she'll get back to me when she can....

I then asked if I was able to fit into the next baby massage set as I wouldnt be able to attend the last week, so had only attended two, so she goes into the room to ask EYP, comes back out and I get

"No I'm sorry those spaces are reserved for those mummies whose children are just coming up for 3 months, we dont have space for any babies who dont meet that"

So I said "Oh ok I thought I'd ask, because theres a woman there with a 7 month old daughter, who said she missed out on them when she was 3 months and I figured it was worth asking so not to worry but thankyou"

THEN
She says "That was a special case, with different circumstance, not because of personal feelings"......

So obv EYP has told her about the exchange in some twisted manner.

And then I just couldnt hold it in, just started crying and left with L in my arms, so idiot chavs had parked their pushchairs in front of mine and hemmed it in, so I had to move theres to get mine and she didnt offer me any help whatsoever....

And I just walked home crying all the way...
Forgot that I was supposed to call at the co-op for milk, so soon as I got home and realised, started crying again, had two feeds left, so fed L, and went out again and now I just hate everyone bar you fine people...........

God what an explanation...
I just hate it. I dont know whats so wrong with me that they'd be that horrible. I dont wanna rant about it anywhere but here because I dont want DH to know what they said. So I need to vent it here (Im so sorry to you all), before he gets home, get all the tears out and return to normality....
Just feel like that was a potential outlet to make friends and I've been brandished like some scarlet lady....

CAFC - I can't go on reading any further without replying to this. I think it's horrible the way those women acted. Yes, there are horrible elements to the world we live in, but to suggest that someone's husband whom they had never met was a peadophile while you were in the room, and no-one say that it was out of order is despicable.

I am embarrassed that there are woman like that in this world. Small minded and inconsiderate to the extreme.

I think that the way it was handled was even more appalling. A so called child-expert such as a HV should know that it can be difficult for anyone with children to attend a class every week - in particularly new mothers with young children/child. FWIW I think your 'excuse' for not attending shows how good a mother you are - making sure you and your DH spent QUALITY time with your LO. That is the important thing here.

Your HV is a total idiot - and I would be tempted to make a complaint to your Practice manager about her. I understand that you can request not to be seen/treated by someone within your GP practice.

As an aside, please let your DH into how you are feeling. You sound quite down, even before this incident and as a new mum lots has changed and you need support. Your DH will want to know I'm sure. You don't have to tell him what they said if you don't want, but let him know you are sad and finding it hard to meet people.

It's hard, but don't let this stop you fromg etting out there and trying different activities. I think others have mentioned that there are sure start centres in various regions and most towns have several toddler groups. the trick is to try a few until you meet people you 'click' with.

I hope you read this with the kindness that's intended. I think you sound like you need some support x