Son's girlfriend moving in

katsclaws

Our son has been with his girlfriend for six months. He has been back home from university for a year and is starting an MA in September and will still be living at home. His girlfriend stays over 4 or 5 nights a week. We do not charge either of our children anything for living here.
Our son has asked if his girlfriend can move in. Are there any legal implications regarding this. ? For example if they split up after say a year could she claim this was her home. ? We are not envisaging charging them anything for living here.
Any advice much appreciated.


katsclaws

Person_one

You could advise him that 6 months is pretty soon to be moving in together, especially under the same roof as your parents and siblings?

Is there a reason why she needs to move out of where she lives now?

Kimberley82

Could you not charge them a very small fee ie £10 a month sort of thing and have a rent book?

Dave101t

i cant advise but i would of already been charging him, and would set up an agreement with her based on tenancy, not relationship. and charge her too.
your opening a can of worms by being so kind...! (which is admirable)

concerned43

Don't think your are doing your son any favours by not charging rent - how is he going to learn to stand on his own two feet? with regards to the GF, no she cannot claim it as her home if they split up and the fact there is a possibility that may happen should they really be living together under your roof? why not stick with the status quo and let her stay over some nights but charge your son a monthly rent.

My sister has done the same as you by not charging her DD rent, she moved her BF in - she then gets pregnant and now there is little room for everyone in the house and Sis can't chuck them out as they have nowhere to go. She wished she never agreed in the first place!!!

BitterAndTwisted

She can claim anything she likes but it wouldn't change the fact that she would only be staying there on your say-so. She wouldn't even have the status of a lodger as she won't be paying anything, and lodgers have no rights to live anywhere if the landlord or landlady wants them to go.

Rent and/or housekeeping aside I think this is a terrible idea all round! Why can't she remain living at home with her parents and continue visiting a few nights a week? And why on earth you would contemplate giving her a free roof over her head with free food and laundry-facilities thrown in for good measure is absolutely beyond me.

jackieglasgow

My OH and I (not married then) lived together in his mother's house for about a year and a half when we were younger. 1997/98. She charged us both £40 per week then for keep including food and bills. It was a huge amount for me out of my £80 a week wage, and I sometimes begrudged her it as we were trying to save for a house and a wedding, and have a social life too, but I will be eternally grateful for their kindness and it certainly taught me a lot about budgeting at the time. You aren't doing your son or your potential lodger any favours by letting them live there without paying their way.

Kimberley82

What my mum did with us was charge us rent at the time it was £40 a week, what we didnt know was she saved it all and gave it to us when we moved out to help us set up on our own.

My boyfriend moved in for a while and it worked great. My best friends boy friend moved in to her parents for just over a year, again no problems, they were not charged, but our parents didnt need the money and they liked that they were helping us out.

I think everyone here is being really negative.

If you dont charge them then I would advice you encourage them to save a bit instead.

Kimberley82

concerned43 wrote: »

with regards to the GF, no she cannot claim it as her home if they split up and the fact there is a possibility that may happen should they really be living together under your roof?

!

If you live by those rules then no relationship is worth the risk because every relationship has the possibility of ending.

achtunglady

its not just the money aspect of it you have to think about. My brother in law moved back home to his mums house with his girlfriend, with the aim of not paying her rent so they could scrape a deposit together for a more suitable place. The MIL is now complaining that they eat her food and drink her milk and do not replace it, and her washing powder and tumble drier, they use their computer, tv and games console and it is costing her more in electric, she used to put £50 on a key meter and it lasted her 2 months, now shes putting £50 a fortnight, and they don't even have a conscience to say here mum take a tenner to cover any bits and bobs, and both are working as well. This was supposed to be a temporary thing but i am betting they will be there beyond xmas.

Karate

I agree with Kimberley about people being too negative.

I had an ex near enough 'move in' to my parents house when I was 17/18, I do think you need to have a practise of living with someone before you make bigger decisions, ie moving out and getting a place with the other person, renting, mortgage etc especially when after a few months of living together you discover it is just not working and you are not as suited as you once thought. Neither of us were charged rent.

I then moved out and moved in with my current OH for a few months, we then both moved into his mothers house, where he paid 200pcm rent and bills (which we both thought was quite unfair as we didn't actually use any utilities, internet, food, it was the summer so no heating etc, we would get into the house at around 11pm and would leave again at 6am! not that we would begrudge actually paying our way, but she had a son older than my OH who had never left home paying nothing for rent and bills and he was in all day using the electricity, eating her food etc!). We then moved in with my parents as it was closer to OHs work, where we were not charged rent/bills.

We are now currently renting a flat from my father and paying all bills etc on our own.

I don't think 'not charging' rent made us any less capable of budgeting etc when we got our own place, but it did make it a hell of a lot easier to buy furniture etc as we could save a bit of our income for that purpose!