Son's girlfriend moving in

serious_saver

This is what I would do! Charge them both for rent and bills (doesn't have to be a lot) - put the money aside and if they are still together when he finishes his MA hand them the money to cover the deposit and first months rent on they're new place.

VK-2008

in this situation i was the gf moving in.
my fiance and i had been together several years, started staying over on special occaisions, then once a month, then after enagaged it was once a week, then i gradually just moved in. well sort of, i would stay about 5 out of 7 nights.
i payed my rent to my parents 200 pounds a month for 2 nights a week
and we never payed anything at other halfs.
we did however look after his younger siblings, buy in messages, offered money for petrol and power etc off our own back which was appreciated. we decorated the room we were staying in, bought new furniture for it, painted it etc.
we bought our own messages and cooked and cleaned after ourselves.
we moved into our own home in january and have been getting on great since

i would say if she is going to stay then come up with some rules/ or fees just so the kids know what is what.
are you happy with the girl moving in?

Fab26

My boyfriend and I live with my parents and pay £100 a month each for rent. This is helped us save for our house deposit and I will always be so grateful to my parents for allowing us to be here and pay so little.
I think you must agree on some type of contribution towards the household, be it doing the chores and/or paying some rent. You can't get things for free, because that makes you dependent on others and doesn't prepare you for the real world outside the comfort of the parents' home.

Tigsteroonie

Serious_saver has the same idea as me. I'd charge them a nominal rent (say £50/wk) to cover all food, bills etc. But put that money into a savings account, and after a year or two you can encourage them to stand on their own two feet by providing a deposit for their first home.

Mojisola

If you decide to go ahead with it, have a family meeting before to discuss how things are going to work and have occasional reviews so that if there are any problems, they can be dealt with.

All families do things differently and something that is normal for her may really irritate you. Something that you can put up with for a week or two can be a deal-breaker three months down the line.

You should also make sure that you are not out of pocket or are doing extra housework because of their presence.

concerned43

Kimberley82 wrote: »

If you live by those rules then no relationship is worth the risk because every relationship has the possibility of ending.

Yes kimberley it does but these guys have only known each other for six months and want to move in together - which is fine but I feel if they are grown up enough to make that commitment then they are grown up enough to live together under their own roof i.e. one they've paid for!

Gemmy_2

Kimberley82 wrote: »

What my mum did with us was charge us rent at the time it was £40 a week, what we didnt know was she saved it all and gave it to us when we moved out to help us set up on our own.

I think the above is an excellent idea. If you can afford not to have rent - save it up to help towards a house.

Myself and my partner moved in with eacother after 5 months of being with each other (we knew eachother for much longer before). We've been living with eachother for god knows now and theres no problems.

I don't think time frame of being with each other must neccessarily be a worry?

serious_saver

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

Serious_saver has the same idea as me. I'd charge them a nominal rent (say £50/wk) to cover all food, bills etc. But put that money into a savings account, and after a year or two you can encourage them to stand on their own two feet by providing a deposit for their first home.

Thank you I am very serious when it comes to saving!

It's virtually impossible for young people to save these days if they have to pay rent so it would give them a good head start even if they don't buy straight away.

consultant31

VK-2008 wrote: »

in this situation i was the gf moving in.
my fiance and i had been together several years, started staying over on special occaisions, then once a month, then after enagaged it was once a week, then i gradually just moved in. well sort of, i would stay about 5 out of 7 nights.
i payed my rent to my parents 200 pounds a month for 2 nights a week
and we never payed anything at other halfs.
we did however look after his younger siblings, buy in messages, offered money for petrol and power etc off our own back which was appreciated. we decorated the room we were staying in, bought new furniture for it, painted it etc.
we bought our own messages and cooked and cleaned after ourselves.
we moved into our own home in january and have been getting on great since

i would say if she is going to stay then come up with some rules/ or fees just so the kids know what is what.
are you happy with the girl moving in?

What does this (in red above) mean?

HelenKA_2

Messages are your shopping! I'm guessing vk-2008 is scottish!