urgent advice needed.

RAS

How you doing casseus?

casseus

update:

after allot of debate and um n r'ing she had no choice but to call social services friday, she did call our local mp who tried her best to get to the bottom of her claims but hit a dead end. child ben told the MP that there was nothing in the system for her at all, income support also told MP that because of child ben itsin susspension. when my partner called child ben they told her that they have her on the system etc but waiting for her forms to arrive when questioned about the mp calling them child ben said that they told her that as they thought it was none of the MP's buisiness to know anything. so friday she had to bite the bullet and call in social services, they provided her with a "survival pack" of food. they are also coming back out tommorrow do assess the house and kids and my ex (why they need to "assess" the house and kids i dont know she asked for help under section 17 under self refurral).

i have reservations about social services i'm not a big fan of them purely because what they have done to a friend of mine i cannot say what because of restrictions imposed on her are so tight even a glint of info given out can have her thrown in prison for 5-12years.

i will say this there are two side to social services one is baby stealing from fit loving homes to force adoption.

meritaten

calm down casseus. the kids wont be taken away - if worst comes to worst then you as dad can apply for custody or grandparents can. their mum wasnt neglecting them - due to circs beyond her control she couldnt feed them - she did her best! as long as the home is clean and the kids appear ok then there shouldnt be a problem. I know about your friend but the circumstances are VERY different.

casseus

update:
social services called to her today. they werent impressed with benefits to say the least, social worker is having a meeting with her manager about the situation as they keep spinning the same spiel to everyone.

my ex is in tears as the kids mis behaved (my eldest has adhd) infont of them asking repeatedly are you taking me away. when asked about hospitals, dentists etc. my one daugter came out with i went to hospital when i drunk turps! and the one with adhd came out with yeh and me when i drunk drugs!

let straighten up before the accusations fly. my eldest daughter broke open my locked cupbord and they both decided drink turps as they thought it was pop, at 2.00am in the morning when everyone was asleep. we dont touch drugs other than prescirbed or counter legal so where my daughter got that from ive no idea.

the social worker gave my ex £10.00 for eleky and gas, and is coming back tomorrow when her manager has decided what course of action to take, my ex partner said that she didnt look impressed when she left, is now in tears for fearing the kids will be taken into care. im apprehensive also only my kids can choose a time to make up story's and miss behave at a time like this!

Oldernotwiser

casseus wrote: »

update:
social services called to her today. they werent impressed with benefits to say the least, social worker is having a meeting with her manager about the situation as they keep spinning the same spiel to everyone.

my ex is in tears as the kids mis behaved (my eldest has adhd) infont of them asking repeatedly are you taking me away. when asked about hospitals, dentists etc. my one daugter came out with i went to hospital when i drunk turps! and the one with adhd came out with yeh and me when i drunk drugs!

let straighten up before the accusations fly. my eldest daughter broke open my locked cupbord and they both decided drink turps as they thought it was pop, at 2.00am in the morning when everyone was asleep. we dont touch drugs other than prescirbed or counter legal so where my daughter got that from ive no idea.

the social worker gave my ex £10.00 for eleky and gas, and is coming back tomorrow when her manager has decided what course of action to take, my ex partner said that she didnt look impressed when she left, is now in tears for fearing the kids will be taken into care. im apprehensive also only my kids can choose a time to make up story's and miss behave at a time like this!

How old are your children that they're roaming around at 2 am, breaking into cupboards without anyone being aware of this?

RAS

casseus

thanks for the updates.

well done for getting the missus to speak to social Services. have you managed to find out if there are any sally army or other food bank locally?

Could you attend tomorrow's meeting and ask them?

And maybe the children would act up less if you were there?

meritaten

oh dear - not the best time for the twins to act up!
I shouldnt worry too much though - they may ask for the hospital reports and discover that 'K' is fibbing, and 'C' did drink turps and the circs about that.
obviously though, the kids have overheard conversations or have heard of SS taking kids away and are worried about it. you need to speak to them and reassure them.
did the MP get back to her? bet he wasnt impressed with benefits either!

meritaten

I cant help feeling that my first reaction is right. the only reason I can think of that the benefits people would lie or stonewall both MP and SS is that your ex is under investigation. You DO spend a lot of time there seeing the kids..............I KNOW you dont spend the night or even stay very late. but you are there every day.

casseus

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

How old are your children that they're roaming around at 2 am, breaking into cupboards without anyone being aware of this?

they are young being 6, the cupboard in question had a lock on it but as said the eldest twin has adhd, and does allot out of impulse, determination, and is quite strong for her age, she doesnt sleep properly and is up on and off during the night, she must of seen me put open the cupboard and seen a bottle, upon waking and being thursty must of remembered that there was a bottle in that cupboard and was determind to open it hence the broken cupboard door. sound doest travel well downstairs to upstairs and being in a room at the front of the house while kitcjen is at back of house couldnt hear a thing, only when youngest twin came in saying she her throat hurt and saying that the pop she drunk tasted horrible me and my ex were deeply mortified.

casseus

RAS wrote: »

casseus

thanks for the updates.

well done for getting the missus to speak to social Services. have you managed to find out if there are any sally army or other food bank locally?

Could you attend tomorrow's meeting and ask them?

And maybe the children would act up less if you were there?

im affraid my presence wouldnt make a difference to my daughter with adhd the more people there the more hyper she will become the more she will act up. the more she acts up the more twin 2 will follow her and then onto my youngest, like a dominoe affect.

the social services are in liason with sally army for the food parcells, social services are collecting them to drop off to my ex as she has no transport or money. social services were supposed to call today with more news about what was happening but they didnt call round to her.