REMO Advice - One Night Stand from 2 Years ago Abroad

Mojisola

postie_bear wrote: »

to date i have not been contacted by the csa but it is nice to know they can only back date this to the date the csa contact me. As i was fearing an 14 yr back payment.

I have never been asked for a DNA test only some medical history, to see if the child was mine as the child suffers an allergy.

I don't think this is true. They can backdate the claim to the date the mother started the claim. If it takes ten years to find the father, he could face ten years of backdated payments.

I wouldn't pass on any medical information about myself. There are lots of children with allergies whose parents don't have any. It would have to be an official DNA test or nothing.

Round_The_Bend

Just googled family law lawyers in Botswana and found this link, which should confirm if the law firm exists.

http://www.hg.org/law-firms/Child-Support-and-Custody/Botswana.html

Or contact the following:

The Law Society of Botswana
Unit 5, First Floor
Kagiso Mall
PO Box 50889
Gaborone, Botswana
Tel: +267 3900 200
E-mail: [EMAIL="lawsociety@mega.bw"]lawsociety@mega.bw[/EMAIL]

Botswana is one of the most progressive countries in Africa, with a well educated population. If you have accurately transcribed the letter that you received, I just don't see how it can genuinely be from a bona fide lawyer. Terms such as "the child that you have brought to this world" and "love relationship" are not conventional legalese I would have thought.

I also cannot imagine that a genuine lawyer would provide you with his client's personal bank details at this stage in the process, let alone offer you the opportunity to renegotiate the levels of maintenance as appears to be suggested.

Personally I would ignore the letters and await notification from the courts in Botswana, if the case is genuine. If you're still worried, why not contact one of the listed lawyers for an initial consultation so that you can find out how the child support system operates. Presumably you will only become liable for child support once an order is made, either by the courts or by the government child support agency, if one exists. Either way, I would have thought that you would still have to be notified, in order to provide you with the oppportunity to respond and presumably to give details of your income so that an accurate assessment can be made. Finally, as far as I understand, REMO only comes into force if the custodial parent has secured a child support order against you, which clearly she has not.

speedster

don't be surprised if you get a couple more letters from them.

one telling you that you have won the botswanan lottery and another asking if you're selling your car they will pay double your asking price into your account.

and all you have to do is give them all your bank details

it's probably a con, so do as round the bend has suggested to be sure.

shell_542

Mojisola wrote: »

I don't think this is true. They can backdate the claim to the date the mother started the claim. If it takes ten years to find the father, he could face ten years of backdated payments.

I wouldn't pass on any medical information about myself. There are lots of children with allergies whose parents don't have any. It would have to be an official DNA test or nothing.

It's from the date the CSA first try to contact the NRP at a confident address. So if they've been trying to send letters to an address for 10 years that the NRP can prove they were never at, they could get effective from date changed. It's not from when the PWC opens the case.

Postie-bear : When the CSA contacted you, you had the opportunity to dispute paternity and get a DNA test done. If you didn't dispute paternity, the CSA will assume you are the father and you will have to pay privately for a DNA test to confirm whether you are the father or not. During this time you'll be liable for child support. If the results come back negative, you'll have the money refunded.

Round_The_Bend

shell_542 wrote: »

It's from the date the CSA first try to contact the NRP at a confident address. So if they've been trying to send letters to an address for 10 years that the NRP can prove they were never at, they could get effective from date changed. It's not from when the PWC opens the case.

When the CSA contacted you, you had the opportunity to dispute paternity and get a DNA test done. If you didn't dispute paternity, the CSA will assume you are the father and you will have to pay privately for a DNA test to confirm whether you are the father or not. During this time you'll be liable for child support. If the results come back negative, you'll have the money refunded.

All of the above is true but none of this is relevant in this particular case as the custodial parent does not appear to have secured an order in Botswana and therefore the CSA in this country would not become involved.

I for one am very interested in how this case pans out, so OP, please try to keep us updated and hope that everything does work out for the best for you.

clearingout

OP - have you told your fiance yet what is happening? It's obviously your decision as to when/how, but if this isn't going to go away, it might be worth thinking about letting her know. Better that you fight this together and find out the child isn't yours, than you have the worry of it all on your own and discover at the end it is your child because you will have to tell her then? I could personally cope with the possibility of a child but wouldn't be happy about an inability to confide in me. However, everyone is different....and of course, you have to weigh it up against the possibility that she might never need to know anyway.

shell_542

Round_The_Bend wrote: »

All of the above is true but none of this is relevant in this particular case as the custodial parent does not appear to have secured an order in Botswana and therefore the CSA in this country would not become involved.

I for one am very interested in how this case pans out, so OP, please try to keep us updated and hope that everything does work out for the best for you.

I was writing in reply to Postie-bear, the poster Mojisola had responded to.

Round_The_Bend

shell_542 wrote: »

I was writing in reply to Postie-bear, the poster Mojisola had responded to.

Oops, sorry. Wasn't intended to be a criticism but was just clarifying matters.

shell_542

Have amended my post now to make it clearer

Gloomy_Past_Bright_Future

SCAM SCAM SCAM,

As a previous poster has stated, if conception occured in October, the baby would be born either very late June or July.

Call their bluff, tell them you were diagnosed as infertile, 5 years ago, therefore the child cannot be yours, let them move onto the next poor victim.