UPDATED *its done!*Our buyer wants to bury their dead dog in our garden

murphydog999

OP after demands for pictures, 'What do you want me to do prop him up by the lobelias and get him to say cheese.' (page 13 I think) Genius! If you don't write sitcoms you should do, this is much better than the ususal rubbish on the box. EXCELLENT :T

henpecked1

well hopefully a conclusion has been drawn to the saga.

Bang on 6pm Mr and Mrs X turned up with their chavvy daughter, the young child they have, the grandfather and a new addition to the story the grandmother.

Mr and Mrs X and their young child spent 15 minutes upstairs with the measuring tape. The older daughter went into the garden and the grandparents sat on the sofa. OH was in the kitchen unloading the washing machine, ignoring what was going on.

The daughter in the garden appeared to be a little distressed that I had chucked all the pond liner on the dogs grave as she was smartening it up. So I sat on my sofa talking to the grandparents. The conversation went like this.

Me: "how are the fish?"
GM: (Grandmother) "The fish dear?" looks confused
GF: (Grandfather) "Oh, um they died on the way home"
Me: Oh god, they were OK when they left here. Sorry they died.
GM: Oh, the fish, yes they came home dead.
GF: I thought you said they were Koi
Me: I thought they were
GF: Not like Koi I have seen before
Me: Oh
GM: Oh they are in my bag (produces waitrose bag containing a few magazines, her glasses)
GF: Anyway, as they were yours, I kept them in the container. I wondered if you wanted to keep them.
Me: You mean bury them? (tongue in cheek)
GM: Oh we used to flush them down the toilet.
ME: Well, I would but they are big fish.

I take the tupperware to the kitchen

GM: Oh, do you mind if we have the tubs back. I use them when I am baking dear.

Me: empties fish in the bin. OH shoots me a look as if to say this is rediculous. She is still sorting out the wet washing.

I Enter room to silence and hands back the empty tubs.

By this time the buyers and their young offsprog come down the stairs. They genuinely thank me again for my help and go to the garden.

So I am standing in the patio doorway looking out at the four of them surrounding my pond liner and my OH brushes past me with the basket of wet laundry. she stops at the rotary line, and she searches around.

In the blanket of silence that hung over the garden, my OH says "have you seen my peg bag?"

JanCee

10 out 10 for the story OP, 2 out of 10 for the photo.

Salz

Thank You for this. It was great :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

clutton_2

now i dont care if this is a windup or not, its darn funny

maybe word will spread with prospective script writers.. come to MSE and see if your tale gets a laugh....

this one certainly has had me roaring with laughter on many occasions.....

new_home_owner_3

brilliant thread henpecked, its good that you see the funny side, thanks for sharing it with us all......:D

guitar63

Great stuff! Thought I was all laughed out after last night but you've started me off again. I'll be pegging out the washing tomorrow with a smile on my face.
Every time I laugh whilst at my lap top my son says, 'Is it the dead dog again?':rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

clutton_2

OP you have brought laughter to many many faces 22000 times in the last few days !!! good on ya.....

azkaban420

Henpecked thanks for such an entertaining thread whether true or not....the dead Koi have swung it to 'not' for me now I'm afraid

Az

fritleyfrisp

Best thread ever.