The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread Part 8!

jeffgeorge

skintscottishgirl wrote: »

Move to Scotland

Up here itn is not legal to buy alcohol after 2200....

XX

Im in scotland

skintscottishgirl

jeffgeorge wrote: »

Not really, no. Not really read your posts, but I have no doubts that if I was to have a drink tonight, I would not stop tomorrow and it would be uncertain if I would ever stop. It wouldnt take me long to get back to daily drinking and I would risk my family, job and life I have rebuilt.

I am an alcoholic who can not drink succuesfully, I just need to remember that. Today has been trying but alcohol is not the answer to the problem that is me. My problems would only be tenfold in the morning.

Tomorrow, I will wake up fresh, aware of what I have done and not with head wreck and remorse, way better then being smashed

I justy don't think that getting smashed on occasion is the be all and end all no offence meant!

The point i am trying to make is if you have an eating disorder you can't say i will never eat again, so why can the same not appy to drinking?

I just think there must be a way other than complete abstinience

Sinclair nethod anyone??

XX

Pippilongstocking

jeffgeorge wrote: »

Not really, no. Not really read your posts, but I have no doubts that if I was to have a drink tonight, I would not stop tomorrow and it would be uncertain if I would ever stop. It wouldnt take me long to get back to daily drinking and I would risk my family, job and life I have rebuilt.

I am an alcoholic who can not drink succuesfully, I just need to remember that. Today has been trying but alcohol is not the answer to the problem that is me. My problems would only be tenfold in the morning.

Tomorrow, I will wake up fresh, aware of what I have done and not with head wreck and remorse, way better then being smashed

:A You might not think you sound really strong when you're feeling those cravings, but that's such a strong post :A

I'm off to bed - Hugs chaps x

skintscottishgirl

Google the sinclair method

I hae become a preacher!!

Or not

Hope that made sense in a manner of speaking xxx

skintscottishgirl

You know i might be smashed but i speak a whole lot of sense....

In my drunken inebriated mind lol

But i don't believe in the concept of so called alcoholism

end of

and at least i've got the guts to state it and risk being wrong

xxx

graemecarter

skintscottishgirl wrote: »

OK here is my thing:

If you are anorexic, or bulimic or have some kind of other problem with food, you can't just say oh i will never eat again....or you will starve to death.

So by default it must be possible to learn better habits with alcohol.

If you want to drink, drink

If you don't want to drink, don't

But i think the word 'alcoholic' is deceptive.

Why should anyone feel the need to never drink again if there is the slightlest possibility there might be another way?

What if someone has been sober for 23 years and decide to have 4 bacardi breezers, then they finish them then they want more?

What makes them a so called 'alcoholic'?

Would they put a brick through the spar shop window if it was shut?

Or would they get over it rapid?

I think it's a lot more complicated than assigning a label, for all of us.....


XXX

Good post - thought provoking.
Alcohol dependent, alcohol abuser, alcoholic, problem drinker, p1sshead, etc are all labels. And none are that helpful if applied to anyone but the individual. I know I am alcoholic. And that's that. That means (to me) that I cannot drink safely.

I didn't try every single method for me to stop drinking. I stopped when I found one that worked for me (AA). People don't keep looking if they have found one that works. CBT, prescription drugs, AA, religion, etc all have their merits, but what works for one will not necessarily work for another.

I, like you, tried will power. It didn't work for me in the long term. I drank again when operating under self will. However, perhaps it may work for you.

graemecarter

skintscottishgirl wrote: »

You know i might be smashed but i speak a whole lot of sense....

In my drunken inebriated mind lol

But i don't believe in the concept of so called alcoholism

end of

and at least i've got the guts to state it and risk being wrong

xxx

I'm glad you post your opinion, and have the guts to say it. :T

graemecarter

skintscottishgirl wrote: »

Felt very bored, tired, etc

Ended up thought f**k it and got a half bottle of vodka.......

1st drink in nearly 7 weeks, likely to go down a treat.......

BUT Ok i broke my rule but i felt i needed a little blowout just tonight and back on the wagon tomorrow, honest:rotfl:

7 weeks is a long time without a drink.
I'd sometimes drink when bored and tired. Not really conducive to a great night of drinking....why did I drink when I felt like that???
I also broke my 'rules', and then re-drew the lines, and would cross them again. For me, alcoholism is a progressive disease.

SimIsOnTheUp

Hi all,

Some good posts on here last night.

SSG, NRA and JeffGeorge - Hope you're all ok.

I've just spent three hours, finishing off my application to the Severn Trent Trust Fund!

Feel quite (understatement..) stressed about money again, but it does feel good knowing I've done something positive about it (begging for help that is!)

Yesterday - Thursday morning, as low and shattered as I felt (had been up all night, and not slept a wink), I was quite productive.

Made a list, and crossed my jobs off -

Pounced on my Postman (ooer missus) to check whether or not the 'trade button' on the intercom is actually working (my neighbour is forever leaving the communal front door unlocked / 'on the latch' so the Postman can get in, even though we have a dedicated button on the intercom, which the Postman can just press to let himself in.

It bugs the f*ck out of me, that the neighbours don't seem to care whether the front door to our building is unlocked 24 / 7. Madness!

I've lived in my flat for 2 years and 2 months now, and have tried getting the Housing Association (phoned / emailed various people / escalated it to various Managers) to fix the door once and for all, so that the Postman can get in, and we can all lock the door. It's never happened :-(

Back in March of this year I was last in touch with my Housing Officer about it, and she was quite helpful - promised it'd be done within the week - confirmed it had been, and put a sign up on the front door, politely asking all of us tenants to 'please lock the f'in door, as the access for the Postman had now been fixed'.

Still my neighbour keeps leaving it open, and the Postman said yesterday morning, that he doesn't think it's worked in the whole of the two years he's been working around here.

Back in about March / April time, I bumped into my neighbour in town (my front door key had stopped working, and she'd offered to lend me her key to copy) ... I said I'd had trouble with the door lock, and that I'd called the Housing Association, and my neighbour said "Don't worry, I'll lend you my key and you can get a copy done"

I said "The door has always been a bit dodgy hasn't it?".. She replied "Yeah, someone keeps locking it"!

Obviously the irony would've been wasted on her.

I didn't say anything, as I didn't want to fall out with her, or any of my neighbours as they are all essentially ok.

However, it is bananas that she is forever leaving it on the latch, when she's got an 8 year old daughter playing about, and anyone can walk in. Her neighbour from down the road also walks in and out 24 / 7, letting the door slam shut loudly, hollering up the stairs - it's like the characters from Shameless in a halls of residence

Months back, before the HA claimed they'd fixed the door lock / intercom (and had put an official sign up on the door), the same neighbour had even put her own makeshift sign up saying "Please do NOT lock the door, as otherwise the Postman will not be able to get in, and we'll all have to collect out post from the sorting office" (!) Why on earth she couldn't have contacted the HA and asked them to fix it, Lord knows..

This seems to have been the preferred 'way things are' in this block of flats for years, and I almost feel that they see me as 'meddling'!

However, I do want the bl00dy door locked, so the building is safe day and night, and I do want the Postman do be able to get in.

Two years on, and I feel a pest to the HA (their response today was not that positive) and a 'meddling minni' / Victor Meldrew to my neighbours

Sorry for my inane ramblings folks. I'm starting to feel ok again, after feeling very ill all week after last week's bender.

After chatting with the Postman about this, I emailed the HA and asked them to SORT IT OUT!

I called my support worker at my local Substance Misuse Team - she's lovely, but their system is a joke.

I admit that I have postponed / cancelled a few appointments there over the months, but yesterday it was like I was calling a hair salon..

"Well ooh I'm booked up this week, busy all next week. I've got commitments on such and such day. I can slot you in on the 18th August though"

Two weeks away. We made small talk, and she asked me how things had been.

Told her about last weeks bender, and she said "OK, but that's alright. You're doing so well for not drinking since Saturday though"

She was obviously trying to be nice and positive, but I did think "That'll be because I had to crawl out of my bed to even get to the bathroom / kitchen, let alone get out the flat.."

I told her about my mate Paul who'd died aged 42, two weeks ago. Now, Paul had been going to the same Substance Misuse Team for help with his boozing for about 6 years (on and off). She'd even asked me about him during a session the other week.

It just upset me yesterday that she couldn't even remember who he was when I told her he'd died.. "Well, I dont want to hear about that happening to you now do I Sim?"

and that was that. Appointment made.

The Subtance misuse place near me, only take you seriously if you drink every day / are in prison / have been in prison / lost everything / are homeless / are a heroin addict.

If you binge like mad every couple of weeks, but can stay sober in between, they don't seem to know what to do with you.

She's mentioned Antabuse before now (I don't want to take it), but every time I've brought up how I think I need to be in Rehab, she's tried to change the subject / said it's early days (after only 3/4 appointments) and she needs to get to know me better. She said a few weeks back that "You are one of my harder clients Sim" and "I'm not sure that Rehab would be for you. Rehab does make you quite exposed, and I think the CBT would be more suited to you"

The lady herself, is lovely. The organisation is useless.

Anyway, I also emailed my CBT bloke for an update on a date regarding both the CBT, and the anxiety management classes (no reply yet).

I called NPower and paid them their £11 a day early (weekly payment plan).

Girlfriend came over for an hour about 3pm to pick something up (all was quite calm thankfully), and then after she'd gone I fell asleep until about 8.30pm!

Now it's 4.20am and my body clock is all over the shop again.

At least I've got my Severn Trent Trust Fund forms finished off (have asked them for help with clearing Water / Electric / Council Tax / bit of Rent Arrears.

I'm doubtful they'll help as they helped me back in about 2001 (they say on the form that "they don't usually help a person more than once, but that you can reapply to the Trust a second time after two years, if your financial situation has deteriorated further"). I am crossing everything though as I would rather not go for a Debt Relief Order.

I've rambled enough.

Am phoning my local Mind later today, to ask for some help down there (to get me out meeting people / for support / might even ask about Volunteering at a later date).

Can't believe I took another £500 (received £420 from them, after their charges) loan out from the PayDay loan place again last Saturday, after all the stress last time, and after my Girlfriend paid it off. Yep, I'm *that* addicted to booze.

After giving my GF some money for a phone / food / mainly booze Saturday night, I was left with about £300. After food since Sunday, I now have £250 left.

I have no idea what I'm going to do. Feel frightened about the possibility of criminal charges after borrowing from them twice now (having told them that I'm working when I'm not / aware at the time I wouldn't be able to repay it)

Was considering a DRO, but feel that now this would be a no go, as the fraud aspect could well come out then.

After calmly writing down my options, I have two -

1 / Keep hold of the £250, and pay off my Rent Arrears / other bills / food / and use £90 of it to pay for a Debt Relief Order (risking the wrath of the Payday loan company / my bank / the Official Receiver - ultimately my DRO would probably be revoked anyway, due to my having taken the loan out fraudulently / so recently before going DRO

OR

2 / Giving the £250 back to the Payday Loan company (I'll give it to my GF to repay them in cash), and then 'rolling over the remaining £300 worth of loans until next month to buy me some breathing space (obviously accruing extortionate interest / their charges in the meantime.

Option 2 seems like the way to go, by way of damage limitation. At least then, I won't risk getting into trouble with Payday loan company / bank / OR in future and I'll still have the option of going for a DRO at a later date.

I'm trying not to beat myself up for having got into such a mess again.

However it's been a while since I had that much money in my flat and I haven't spent it on booze. That has to be a step in the right direction.

Sorry for going on ladies and gents. I had to get this down.

Off to bed for a few hours. Up at 7am for breakfast.

Cheers,

Sim x

flimsier

I'm back. Haven't drank at home since my daughter was born (over a month), or at all for over a week.