It's STILL tough and not getting better - so how are we coping?

Hippeechiq

I'm a country girl at heart....lived in Norfolk for 23years and Suffolk for 17, both times in deep countryside and a 20 minute drive to the nearest town, and I love everything about the countryside with a passion.

I now live in a town in Dorset that is only a ten minute walk from the sea. It's a lovely town, but I do miss the seasons and the tranquillity of the countryside. Last year we took up hiking. Dorset is full of glorious countryside & coastal walks and both my partner and I really enjoyed "getting away from it all". It was good for the soul, our little piece of tranquillity and was especially nice for us as we both used to work indoors.

Then in January I was made redundant, and in April the car failed it's MOT and we don't have the money to get it fixed or buy a new one, so that - along with my daughter becoming ill - well and truly knocked the hiking on the head, which is such a shame.

On a bright note though, even though we're in a busy town, we have had a robin, sparrows, great tits, blue tits and coal tits, oh, and a pigeon in the garden today, even though the previous owner of our house laid all the back garden down to slabs, there is still a tree, and several shrubs along the border, and we always have nuts hanging from the tree and a bowl of water out for the birds, so we still have our little piece of "countryside" in our back garden, and are there many things more touching than watching a robin/blue tit/sparrow having a bird bath?

Princess_kate

kezlou wrote: »

Apparently it has or will be going up in every store. I even trie a more expensive brand to see if was just sainsbugs taking the pee but nope the marvel dried milk was just as bad. I think because of last winter the supermarket are putting the price up on them to cash on the prospect of rubbish weather so to speak.

i was the same kath when i had to last buy bra's, making me feel sick thinking about it.

Well just scoffed a load of tortillas and dips with the boys. Won't be dinner for a while yet so that should fill them for now. I'll check out aldi regarding the dried milk in there and let you know the price of it. I overheard some of the staff in home bargains saying they might be stocking dried milk soon, so its bound to be cheaper in there.

Let me know if you fine dried milk in aldi, i havent seen it!

I did get some marvel in HB last week, 198g for around £1.30, listed on my supermarket for £2.12, might get another at that price!

Frugalista

ceridwen wrote: »

I just checked out the Argos catalogue and put "wheelchair" in the search box and, amongst other stuff, it came up with 3 mini-scooters.

I'd loathe/detest/feel thoroughly sorry for myself if I ever needed to use anything like that personally - but would just have to give myself a stern lecture that it really wasnt any reflection on me if I had to and go and get one sorted out if the choice was between feeling very conspicuous/etc/etc using one or feeling stircrazy stuck indoors. So I can understand if you don't want to be seen out in something like that - but if needs must and its the only way to get out then I suppose having to use one is the lesser of two evils..

Am I the only person who is completely and utterly gobsmacked at such a condescending and smallminded attitude :eek::eek::eek:. I was so shocked when I read that - I had to leave the computer and calm down :mad:. There but for the grace of God that you have a choice ceridwen.

My mother uses a mobility scooter to get around all the time, as does her husband who has Parkinsons. Their scooters are an absolute lifeline to them both. I am absolutely shocked to the core that someone would think in the above terms. OMG!!!!!!!

Rummer

Frugalista wrote: »

Am I the only person who is completely and utterly gobsmacked at such a condescending and smallminded attitude :eek::eek::eek:. I was so shocked when I read that - I had to leave the computer and calm down :mad:. There but for the grace of God that you have a choice ceridwen.

My mother uses a mobility scooter to get around all the time, as does her husband who has Parkinsons. Their scooters are an absolute lifeline to them both. I am absolutely shocked to the core that someone would think in the above terms. OMG!!!!!!!

I don't think that was the way it was intended. My mum has to use a wheelchair and was initially very uncomfortable and self concious about using it. Sadly she has had negative experiences of people staring and talking to her differently or not at all.

However the benefits and freedom that it has given her has changed her perception and she has overcome her initial reluctance. Taking the step to use a scooter or wheelchair can be a big one for a lot of people. However as you say Frugalista they provide a vital lifeline for people who need them.

Gigervamp

BigMummaF wrote: »

We get the tiniest frogs coming in to the lounge some evenings! We've got a funny house where the kitchen is in the front & lounge at the back, so often sit here with the door open, weather permitting. And don't ditch-pigs make a racket :eek: One evening when The Offspring were little & had gone up to bed, I was convinced there was a burglar in the garden Thankfully there was a tennis racquet handy so I grabbed it up, threw the door open & shouted 'I've called the Police!', to be confronted by two adolescent hedgehogs snuffling around for slugs :rotfl:

The people next door are still in the throes of extension building works so we have those industrial wire fence panels to keep Pup safely in our garden. The birds though are having a real good time & we are having free entertainment watching their antics & acrobatics...ain't Nature wonderful

That's one of the things that I love about living in the sticks. I don't get out in the week because I don't drive and even if I did, hubby has the car. But I find a lot of joy watching the antics and listening to the birds around here.

Now that we've got chickens, the fun has doubled. Gawd, you should have seen them today when I went out to give them their corn. Three were flapping their wings and flying low and the other one was running as fast as her legs could go. It reminded me of the DamBusters film!

I try to look at things like a child does and see the wonder and it's great. It certainly puts a perspective on things. (And it's much better than watching the tat on tv!)

katholicos

Frugalista wrote: »

My mother uses a mobility scooter to get around all the time, as does her husband who has Parkinsons. Their scooters are an absolute lifeline to them both. I am absolutely shocked to the core that someone would think in the above terms. OMG!!!!!!!

My Dad bought a mobility scooter today, we've all been pleading with him for ages because he is so severely debilitated and it's driving him nuts not being able to walk more than a few steps. I'm hoping it gives him a new lease of life and that it will enable him an Mum to go out more as the one he bought today can fit in the car apparantly.

ceridwen

Frugalista wrote: »

Am I the only person who is completely and utterly gobsmacked at such a condescending and smallminded attitude :eek::eek::eek:. I was so shocked when I read that - I had to leave the computer and calm down :mad:. There but for the grace of God that you have a choice ceridwen.

My mother uses a mobility scooter to get around all the time, as does her husband who has Parkinsons. Their scooters are an absolute lifeline to them both. I am absolutely shocked to the core that someone would think in the above terms. OMG!!!!!!!

I am sorry that I have inadvertently offended you. I probably phrased this badly. NO-one wants to have to use things like mobility scooters - and I was just saying how much I would hate to have to personally - but, if needs must, then I would just have to accept I had to and do so. Obviously these are a lifeline for anyone needing one - hence why I suggested them as a possibility.

I've heard a lot of people complain about having to use mobility aids of any description and that they really don't want to and feel bad about having to do so - but they do so, because they need to - understandably. I certainly regularly recall a female friend complaining about all the paraphernalia she had to use because of M.S. and saying just how she felt about it...she was making some pretty unprintable comments about it sometimes - but had to accept she needed it and did so reluctantly..

I've heard my parents complain about feeling self-conscious about having to use various "bits and bobs".

I am sorry if you took it in a way that wasnt meant at all by me.

ceridwen

Rummer wrote: »

I don't think that was the way it was intended. My mum has to use a wheelchair and was initially very uncomfortable and self concious about using it. Sadly she has had negative experiences of people staring and talking to her differently or not at all.

However the benefits and freedom that it has given her has changed her perception and she has overcome her initial reluctance. Taking the step to use a scooter or wheelchair can be a big one for a lot of people. However as you say Frugalista they provide a vital lifeline for people who need them.

Thank you - that is what I mean and why I would worry. The female friend I mention was used to being thought of as attractive and miss the "attention". I myself am used to having been once thought of as attractive (and yes it does help in life....) - and I don't like the fact that I rarely notice approving glances, etc, from men any more - as I was pretty used to them when I was younger. With age has come the "being invisible" that many middle-aged women complain about:(. We judge OURSELVES by our appearance - and MY OWN judgement of MYSELF has changed just from ageing - and its MY OWN judgement of MYSELF that I would be concerned with. It would take a LOT of mental adjustment on my part to deal with being in a situation like that - it would for many of us. I was explaining how self-conscious I know I would feel personally and would resent the fact that where once I had been flirted with I was now being helped.

I've seen my friend fuming at the way someone talked to her - where once she was used to quite the reverse and been trying to explain that they had "meant well" - but just put it badly.

Another female friend is complaining volubly now at the choice of footwear she is having to use because illness has changed her feet - so I sympathise and then try to help her find footwear that looks "normal"...

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I do feel upset here myself at someone taking what was meant to be helpful advice/sympathetic comments the wrong way....but thats life.

notjustlaura

Rummer wrote: »

I don't think that was the way it was intended. My mum has to use a wheelchair and was initially very uncomfortable and self concious about using it. Sadly she has had negative experiences of people staring and talking to her differently or not at all.

However the benefits and freedom that it has given her has changed her perception and she has overcome her initial reluctance. Taking the step to use a scooter or wheelchair can be a big one for a lot of people. However as you say Frugalista they provide a vital lifeline for people who need them.

Just wanted to agree with this. My father has cerebral palsy and resisted a wheelchair/scooter for many, many years. At one point, he wouldn't even use a walking stick! I think he'd spent so long proving to the world that he's a capable, competent man (which he is - he just doesn't walk normally) that he saw the mobility aids as a sign of weakness or an admission that he is, in fact, disabled.

Anyway, he now uses a scooter and it's given him a whole new lease of life - which is fantastic! But I've noticed that people treat him differently. Checking in at the airport, for example, the steward will ask my *mum* 'Can he walk at all?' when my father is sitting right in front of them. Without the scooter they generally asked *him* 'Do you require assistance, sir?' My father laughs it off - something I find harder to do.

Laura

ceridwen

I know what you mean.

My father is used to being seen as intelligent/capable/good-looking. My mother is used to being seen as capable/pretty.

Now they are just seen as two little old people - and I'm there thinking "Thats my parents you're on about". I know they've changed so much from what they used to be - and they and I collude in not mentioning it any more than we can help.

Anyway - this poem puts it so much better than I can:

http://www.nursinghomealert.com/seeme.html