Living together - does he become liable for her children?

DX2

JSB43 wrote: »

That might explain why it was not made clear by the authorities before committing to living together.

Okay lets thrash this out so to speak.
Do you expect the tax payer to be liable for F and her three kids whislt M is liable for his child and himself?

JSB43

deedee71 wrote:

Now the OP has said he is a software engineer earning £105,000pa I am starting to think this couple may be playing on the sympathies of a benevolent relative.

We seem to have a lot of contributors not reading the post before pressing the reply button. I have never said I was a relative, and I have never said my salary was otherwise.

Please people, can we keep to the facts.

JSB43

DX2 wrote: »

Okay lets thrash this out so to speak.
Do you expect the tax payer to be liable for F and her three kids whislt M is liable for his child and himself?

Yes, I expect he should get at least something in tax credits.

The alternative is M can leave taking his daughter with him which leaves a family of four on social security.

DX2

JSB43 wrote: »

Yes, I expect he should get at least something in tax credits.

The alternative is M can leave taking his daughter with him which leaves a family of four on social security.

So you want M to get tax credits for himself and his child, forgetting about his partner and her three children?

icklejulez

What I am more concerned at the more I read this is why is there such a problem that M cannot accept that he may have to take responsibility for these other 3 children. Like I said previously my ex left me with 2 children and I only allowed my boyfriend to move in with me as he was ready to see the children as his own. We are now having another child together (his first) and under no circumstances would I allow him to live with me if he saw any of these children different. If he only had £3 to his name I would expect him to give them a 1/3rd each and he see's it the same way. Im sorry but whether or not he has produced these other children (who unfortuantly have already lost one parent) if he moves into the household acting like a father then he needs to take responsibilty as a father figure, whether this is his official status. And if I was in a situation where my boyfriend was looking into whether he has financial liability for these children then his backside would be out the door. If he couldn't cope with the responsibility then he shouldn't of moved in. As for the tax credits as long as you push them you can get things moving. Like I said previously it has taken me 8 weeks but it takes 10 days for them to send forms out (my first ones went missing) so I ordered some more, these were with me within 5 days. I immediatly sent these back recorded next day delivery (signed for). I them phoned them every other day, to ensure they had everything they needed. If they need the money that much then they will be persistant to push them. I would also ensure before F gets the forms she knows her Child Benefit number as this isnt given out over the phone by the child benefit people and has to be requested to be posted (10 day turnaround time).

DX2

Op humour me please what is your definition of common in law husband and wife?

AnxiousMum

To the OP - M may not be legally obligated to provide for F's previous three children - but F came with a package. If he didn't like the package in it's entirety, then he should've just walked away before undoing the ribbons on the package and creating a baby.
F is at home looking after the infant, while her older children are in school. I'm assuming this is a decision the couple made together - but what did he expect the other three children to live on while F is home looking after infant? Personally I think that if this is too much of a 'bother' for M, then he needs to walk away now - because as the expenses increase for the other three children, his resentment will just grow and grow if he feels 'his' money is going towards 'her' children. Does F know how he feels about this? As a previously single mum of two and now a mother to five - three with my partner - if I ever thought that my partner resented anything about my first two children, I think I'd be questioning my decision making skills, as my two children came before any other man, and always will. ALL my children and their welfare will ALWAYS come before any partner!

Starrystarrynight

Can I just say thanks to all the posters who've given such good advice and guidance on this thread.

JSB43

DX2 wrote: »

So you want M to get tax credits for himself and his child, forgetting about his partner and her three children?

I think your comment has a large degree of assumption.

If you read my OP I am exploring the legal position. Its nothing about wanting to increase his own income, its about providing for the whole family under his own means. Its something he cannot do on his own and I am eexploring the legal position.

icklejulez

JSB43 wrote: »

Yes, I expect he should get at least something in tax credits.

The alternative is M can leave taking his daughter with him which leaves a family of four on social security.

Well if this is how he feels I think F should get rid of him straight away sounds like a complete loser. And as for F is she lets him walk out of the house with that child then she is worse than he is. You dont get into a relationship with someone who has children and treat them like this. Im so glad this guy doesnt live with me!