Full time working mums input please!

onlyroz

Housework and ironing? What's that? I get up at 7-7:30 (depending on whether I want a shower or not). I get the kids up at 7:30, and get them dressed and breakfasted. Sometimes I even have time for breakfast myself. We leave for school at 8:30, dropping my son off at 8:40. Daughter gets to nursery by 9:00. Then I get to the office for around 9:45.

Monday-Wednesday I pick up my son at 15:10, and then work from home until 17:45, to pick my daughter up at 18:00. Husband gets in at around 18:30 and we eat at 19:00. (Daughter has her dinner at nursery). Thursday-Friday husband picks up the boy from school and I stay in the office until 17:00, to pick up daughter at 18:00. Daughter goes to bed around 19:30, and son goes to bed around 20:30. I've then got the rest of the evening to think about doing housework - but usually decide to play around on the computer instead...

minimoneysaver

A few quick thoughts of things that I do to try and make my life a little more simple (I'm a single, disabled working mother)
* add extra fabric softener to washes & put washing on hangers to save on ironing... nothing needs it here now.
* get a cleaner in for an hr or two a week.
* grocery shop on line and get it delivered in the evening so you have time to put it away and sort fridge etc.
* get clothes out the night before.
* freeze a weeks worth of sandwiches on a Sunday night, along with frubes etc.
* could children have their hot dinner at school & light tea instead while you run baths etc?
* don't be afraid to ask for help if it is offered.
* have you asked if the childminder will do breakfast for the children in the morning and get them dressed etc?
* kids can do with a bath/shower every other night, as long as you give a quick wipe over.
* but most of all, make at least 1/2 an hr for yourself every day, even if it is a book in the bath... so important!

mikey72

heretolearn wrote: »

No offence but why isn't your husband doing his share of stuff in the evenings and weekends? He basically does one hour a day extra 'work' than you by leaving earlier, but then you more than make up for that in the evenings by doing the housework. Why can't you and he have a big blitz together at the weekends and never mind doing it during the week? It looks like all he does is 'work' and then funtime with the kids, no housework at all. You are doing a lot more than he does.

Your weekdays could be about the same - ok, he leaves earlier than you, but your pre-work routine is a darn sight harder and more stressful. Then in the evenings you are sorting kids and dinner till he gets home, you all (kids as well) eat dinner then (why are you cooking twice for goodness sake?!), he does kids bath while you make tomorrows lunches, kids to bed, you both relax. Don't worry about hoovering etc during the week, why bother? Washing and ironing can be done as a big blitz at weekend (I hope he does his own and part of the kids ironing?)

That way you both get to chill out, life if better all round even if there may be a smattering of crumbs on the carpet sometimes.

Then at weekends you both have a mega blitz. With two of you it can't take more than a couple of hours to clean the house top to toe, surely. Laundry - the two of you keep chucking the week's loads in over the weekend. Ironing, have a session Sunday eve, you for an hour, him for an hour, while you are watching tv or something and the other one plays with the kids, you'll get the whole week's stuff done ready.

Really, he isn't pulling his weight, is he.

No problem with that, so long as you include are the grass cutting, gardening, car cleaning, painting, MOT's, garage, house repair, putting out the bins, cleaning the drains, and the thousand and one other jobs that in your world happens by itself.
Or do you do that in your family, or don't you pull your weight there?
The op isn't complaining about her husband.

gratefulforhelp_2

I agree, it is easy to forget about those "outside" jobs, but I think the suggestion was just to make sure he is doing his fair share. I'm really lucky, DH does fully his share and maybe a bit more, but he's quite rare I think?

mikey72

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

I agree, it is easy to forget about those "outside" jobs, but I think the suggestion was just to make sure he is doing his fair share. I'm really lucky, DH does fully his share and maybe a bit more, but he's quite rare I think?

Must be.
Even though in your experience your husband does his full share, based on your experience of no-one else the rest don't?
Most of the posts on here mention their oh for helping.
Obviously some logic I'm missing here.
It'll be similar to the fact the op has posted her routine and not his, so the logic says he must be sitting with his feet up watching Sky, as that's what all men do.

Counting_Pennies_2

I think you have to cut out some of the perfection, and see if you can purchase help in, through the childminder doing a few things to help you and being a little more slack with things. Get a cleaner in to do the housework while you are out at work

hope the below helps

6.45 - wake up, get bags ready for me and children try to do this the night before
7.00 - get kids up, washed no need to wash them and give them breakfast ask the childminder to give them breakfast. I get dressed and hair done.
5.20 - collect children from my minder ask the childminder to keep them until 6pm and give them supper. if time allows go home and do the preparation for your batch cooking and put in oven to cook, or do the ironing or some of the million other things you do in the evening, then collect them and go home
5.45 - put a batch-cooked dinner on to cook Go easy on yourself, fish fingers and the like are a healthy option for some of the week.
6.15 - feed kids, if kids are fed that allows you just one meal to have to prepare tidy kitchen, prepare dinner for me and my husband
8.30 - ironing (if needed), batch cooking and a million other things before we flop into bed at 10.30ish. You will go insane without a break, you must sit down and have an hour or two together, or doing hobby things, not housework

Spendless

Well if he's anything like mine he will:

mikey72 wrote: »

No problem with that, so long as you include are the

grass cutting, employ someone

gardening, only have grass, see above

car cleaning, HIS car you mean as oppossed to OUR house/children? Anyway take to garage.

painting, every couple of years employ someone often a family member.

MOT's- run to garage myself
garage, see above
house repair, employ someone
putting out the bins,done by me

cleaning the drains, nope never happened once is the 8 years here and 15 of home ownership
and the thousand and one other jobs that in your world happens by itself. now we're talking, you mean like replacing the toilet roll when it runs outs, putting back in the cupboard every single condiment he gets out when making himself a sandwich. You realise it's me. Really happy, glad someone has

Or do you do that in your family, or don't you pull your weight there?
The op isn't complaining about her husband.

My own husband helps with the chores that the OP is doing herself, which is just as well from the above list. The things that the OP is talking about are daily chores, not seasonal/one off/occassional/annual events which a lot of your list is. Let's put it another way I think the OP should stop doing the chores she's listed and do yours above instead. Wonder who'd think they'd got a better deal.;)

mikey72

Spendless wrote: »

Well if he's anything like mine he will:My own husband helps with the chores that the OP is doing herself, which is just as well from the above list. The things that the OP is talking about are daily chores, not seasonal/one off/occassional/annual events which a lot of your list is. Let's put it another way I think the OP should stop doing the chores she's listed and do yours above instead. Wonder who'd think they'd got a better deal.;)

So what's your point.
Get a cleaner/housemaid for a few hours.

gratefulforhelp_2

mikey72 wrote: »

Must be.
Even though in your experience your husband does his full share, based on your experience of no-one else the rest don't?
Most of the posts on here mention their oh for helping.
Obviously some logic I'm missing here.
It'll be similar to the fact the op has posted her routine and not his, so the logic says he must be sitting with his feet up watching Sky, as that's what all men do.

You're coming accross as someone who feels he and other males are being attacked, and I don't think thats the general tone of the thread.
I'm afraid my experience does include several other people first-hand and anecdotal evidence about many others.
But anything on a forum will be a story told by one person, and we rarely ever get both sides of that story.

What's your issue? The OP just wants some practical suggestions. Where's the harm?

mikey72

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

You're coming accross as someone who feels he and other males are being attacked, and I don't think thats the general tone of the thread.
I'm afraid my experience does include several other people first-hand and anecdotal evidence about many others.
But anything on a forum will be a story told by one person, and we rarely ever get both sides of that story.

What's your issue? The OP just wants some practical suggestions. Where's the harm?

I thought she wanted some practical suggestions as well.

"Really, he isn't pulling his weight, is he. "

Doesn't seem a practical suggestion.
So you'll have to forgive me if I come across as someone who thinks males are being attacked, as for the life of me I can't really see how the op could put that into use to help her.
She could start a fight with her op by quoting it, but as to any other practical use?
Maybe I'm missing something here.

Counting_pennies, is an example of an excellent post, not critical, but helpful, and advising to find time together which is still essential.