what qualifies you as being disabled?

Indie_Kid

krisskross wrote: »

Didn't think GPs did fortune telling. So what did she suggest you needed to do in the intervening 5 years that would then equip you to work?

But some can be right. My parents were advised when I was 4 that I wouldn't be able to drive when I'm older. They said the same thing 3 years ago and it's still true.:(

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

pipkin71 wrote: »

I am really surprised she has suggested you can't think of returning to work for another five years, BCS.

For starters, you haven't tried all available medication for depression and so you could recover in three months time if you had the appropriate prescription.

Why 5 years? Why not 10 years? How can she be so specific?

The fact her brother has Aspergers, is neither here nor there. Having Aspergers doesn't prevent someone from working full time and many do just that.

Giving you a time scale of five years really won't do you any good, either, and can have an extremely negative effect on your mental health, particularly as you seem to have taken her word and feel you can't return to work for five years.

Ive tried numerous antidepressants & none of them work on me, infact most of them give me bad side effects such as weight gain & migraines.

The mental health team said that they can't help me as my depression is a symptom of my asperger's not a chemical imbalance that taking anti depressants can solve.

Her brother still lives at home & she said that he will never be able to live independantly so ive managed better than he has I suppose.

I think she is just trying to be realistic, she has seen the numerous suicide attempts & the self harm, she has seen me at my worst at & my best so I suppose she knows me quite well.

She seems to think that it's gonna take that long for me to have all the surgeries & the therapy I need.

I have had alot of jobs as I never seem to be able to stay in the same place & usually end up leaving before I get sacked due to issues with authority.

I think ive cried & had time off for depression at every single job ive ever had apart from when I worked for my dad or when I had my own business.

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

pipkin71 wrote: »

Were you working in 2007 and 2009?

No, I gave up my job in Jan 2006 after having 6 months off sick.

The breakdown in 2007 was because they had to take my implant out for 6 months to let the scars heal as I kept getting infections.

The one last year was due to stress, relationship & family issues.

I'm constantly stressed, anxious & run down at the moment, I keep getting ear infections & throat infections.

pipkin71

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

Ive tried numerous antidepressants & none of them work on me, infact most of them give me bad side effects such as weight gain & migraines.

The mental health team said that they can't help me as my depression is a symptom of my asperger's not a chemical imbalance that taking anti depressants can solve.

Her brother still lives at home & she said that he will never be able to live independantly so ive managed better than he has I suppose.

I think she is just trying to be realistic, she has seen the numerous suicide attempts & the self harm, she has seen me at my worst at & my best so I suppose she knows me quite well.

She seems to think that it's gonna take that long for me to have all the surgeries & the therapy I need.

I have had alot of jobs as I never seem to be able to stay in the same place & usually end up leaving before I get sacked due to issues with authority.

I think ive cried & had time off for depression at every single job ive ever had apart from when I worked for my dad or when I had my own business.

Thanks, BCS.

I can't agree with her, because you just don't know what's round the corner.

I can understand the side effects of the anti-depression drugs, but, I would also think you have to weigh up what is worse, depression or weight gain, for example.

One of the drugs I take to control my pain has a side effect of weight gain, but |I would rather have the weight gain over the pain, so I take it. The fact that the drugs you've tried so far, have given you side effects, doesn't mean that all drugs will be no good for you. You may well be prescribed something that works.

Out of interest, do you take anti depressants now, or do you not take any because they may have side effects?

She cannot base a decision on how her brother is affected by Aspergers and I, personally, don't think it was very professional of her to do so.

Clearly, there are circumstances where you can work - for yourself, for example, when the time is right. Don't allow the Dr to write you off for the next five years, as you just don't know.

pipkin71

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

No, I gave up my job in Jan 2006 after having 6 months off sick.

The breakdown in 2007 was because they had to take my implant out for 6 months to let the scars heal as I kept getting infections.

The one last year was due to stress, relationship & family issues.

I'm constantly stressed, anxious & run down at the moment, I keep getting ear infections & throat infections.

So, if you weren't working, then the depression couldn't have been the fault of employment. Maybe, when you were at work, the depression was also family related but it was easier to use work as the cause??

If working didn't cause the breakdown or suicide attemp [:(] then I honestly can't see why you would be told you can't work for five years.

I will leave it there, as I don't want to come across as 'having a go' but I will say, for yourself, don't let someone write you off the way your GP seems to have done.

Savvy_Sue

I think from what you've said that it might be sensible to take her advice not as "You won't be able to ..." but more as "it might be in your own best interests not to consider ... trying to get a job for the next few years / working in a factory or warehouse" IYSWIM.

And when you're better, is there anything to stop you working for yourself again? That can suit Aspies very nicely: DS1 is doing that, and while he's not making a fortune and has some problems with self-motivation, it's one way round the problem.

However, not something to rush into. No need to answer my post, just a suggestion for a different way of looking at things.

Oldernotwiser

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

I didn't know I had asperger's until I was diagnosed at 33 after suffering from depression/anxiety for 8 years.

My OT says that I managed the role of being a worker before I had kids & I managed the role of partner & mother ok too.

Trying to juggle being a mother/partner/worker was too much for me as I spread myself too thinly which is what initially triggered my depression/anxiety leading to my first breakdown in 1998.

I had another breakdown in 2005 which resulted in me having to give up my job, another one in 2007 when I first tried to overdose & another one last year when I tried to cut my wrists.

Everyone copes differently but the fact is that alot of people with aspergers can't work full time & my history proves that working full time damages my mental health.

Even if all this was undeniably true, all it shows is that you can't cope with being a worker, a parent and a partner. It's interesting that it's the worker role that you have decided to drop!

Indie_Kid

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Even if all this was undeniably true, all it shows is that you can't cope with being a worker, a parent and a partner. It's interesting that it's the worker role that you have decided to drop!

But she can't exactly abandon her children, can she?

Oldernotwiser

sh1305 wrote: »

But she can't exactly abandon her children, can she?

No, but she can choose whether to have more or to be in a relationship.

Savvy_Sue

Onw, I can't quite make sense of those posts: I know that if I couldn't cope with working, motherhood and marriage, working would be the first to go!