Just Need To Say.....

zombiecazz

just wanted to say that we are all here for you. I'm so glad you have your girls back. Fingers are crossed that all will be resolved.

I was very unhappy about your post being closed without any warnings.

Please keep us informed as to your progress, so that we can offer support.

anon43_2

homersimpson - it is at least until the police investigation is over, my partner has been bailed without charge and is due to return to the police station on the 6th October. Both his criminal and family solicitors have said that it will probably all be over by then as the have no substantial evidence only a statment from my son which has mistakes all the way through so wouldnt hold up in court anyway. Things like throughout the statment he refers to my partner as 'dad' and 'daddy' he has never ever called my aprtner anything other than his name, he knows he is not his dad and has never called him it. Also in his statment it says that these incidents happened in the presence of myself and his sisters, my son has never met my youngest daughter he went into the foster home on the 26th July i gave birth to my daughter a few days later and due to social services messing me about with contact he is still yet to meet her.

rainbowrisin - i dont feel so odd for doing housework at this time of night now that you have said that lol. I managed to get an hours sleep this afternoon whilst the girls were asleep i kow its not much but its keeping me going for now...
I really dont feel like i am holding it together at the moment every hour or so i am breaking down and crying i suppose its only a natural reaction but i hate my kids seeing me like this

zombiecazz - thankyou your support means a lot

Fran

anon,

You really need some (real, not virtual) support, have you followed up the suggestions given before (though of course being a Bank Holiday you might not get hold of people if you haven't already made contact).

What about family, friends, neighbours, there must be someone you can contact to help you with practical things or just be there to talk to?

anon43_2

Thanks Fran

I have my sister though she is doing her best to try and avoid the subject so not to upset me. I also have my partners parents but to be honest i dont want to trouble them as they have done so much to help us this week as it is. Apart from them i dont have anyone

My midwife phoned me this morning as i still havent been discharged from her yet, she had just found out what had happened and rang me to see if i was ok (she has known me for years) and she cant believe what they are doing to me and is coming to see me on friday to make sure im ok....

hjb123

Glad to hear that you have got some support around you - dont be afraid to use them! They might also be glad that you are talking about it and not bottling it all up inside.

Good Luck though anyway!

Savvy_Sue

Agree that you should use all the support you can get! I'm sure your midwife will refer you to the HV, ask her for support as well, it's a horrible situation to be in with a small baby.

anon43_2

Tbh from what i read on the application for the emergency protection order the health visitor has been more involved with them than i thought.
It stated on there 'The health visitor has had abusive threatening voicemail messages left on her phone regarding the family' which is the first i have heard about it infact thats not the only thing on there that doesnt make sense.
At the moment i dont know whether its just me being paranoid but im starting to feel like all 'professionals' to do with the children are watching everything i do and waiting for me to trip up and fail.
I know social services were far from happy on saturday when they had to return the children to me, to be honest it made me feel sick its like they get some sort of satisfaction from tearing familys apart their big smug smirks on their faces when they took the girls away confirmed that in my mind :mad:
But as hard as i am finding it i am not going to give them any reason whatsoever to get their own way again, i was up until 2am bleaching all my skirting boards and door frames etc - i wouldnt mind but they didnt even need doing i only did them on monday just gone, but i refuse to give them anything that they can use against me....

Savvy_Sue

I suggest you make sure to tell your solicitor about anything you disagree with. For example who have the abusive messages come from, when and what was said? And I note it says 'about' the family - not a family member then?

And try not to get obsessed with cleaning. They might use that against you and it's more important to 'be' there for your daughters.

More hugs.

essexhoney

Hi All - feeling a bit stronger now and have decided not to hide behind another name

Thought you may want to be updated on what has been happening recently. The situation is still far from resolved unfourtunatly

I was voluntarily interviewed by the police and have been accused of neglecting my children Which has been reported to the crown prosectution service to decide whether it should be taken further (standard procedure apparently) my solicitor has said that he cant see it going any further as all the 'evidence' they have is a social workers report who hasnt been to my home since the beginning of july which is completly different to the report she wrote for the court when they went to apply for the EPO :rolleyes:

The 6th of October came and my partner went back to the police station for his bail, and they have rebailed him for another 4 weeks which on the one side is extremly upsetting and annoying im trying to look at the positive side that they obviously dont have enough evidence to charge him and there isnt anymore evidence for them to get.

I am now finally getting contact with my son although its supervised for an hour and a half 3 times a week, and my partner is seeing the girls once a week for 3 hours supervised also. This is being done in a family contact centre and they have been really good with us.

We have had a lot of problems in between including my son being covered in bruises and them not being able to explain them :eek: and them moving my son without telling me and the foster carer now asking for my son to be removed from her home the reason for this in the social workers words 'there is an insecure attachment between my son and the foster carers eldest son, he just wants to be involved with everything' - isnt that what 6 year olds do?!?

For now its all just a waiting game nothing can happen until after the police investigation is over which at the moment seems so far away

Im far from happy but i am a hell of a lot stronger in myself, i honestly cant see my relationship with my partner surviving this to the end we are arguing all the time and its doing me in

Im sure there is probably loads that i have missed out while updating so much has happened i doubt i could remember it all if i tried thank god i have written everything down!

I just want to say thank you to everyone who offered me there advice and support throughout these past 2 months i really couldnt have done it without you, and especially to lynzpower who has been a real rock for me and didnt even think twice before getting on a train to come and help me (lynz your a true star! and as i have said to you before if there is anything i can do to help you just tell me n i have broke my msn which is why i havent been online again always summat wrong with this pc :rolleyes: ) I have had a lot of supposed 'friends' not know the whole situation, jump to conclusions and stop talking to me since this happened which made me realise they quite clearly werent my friends after all.

I suppose in a way this whole situation helped me reevaluate some aspects of my life......

thanks everyone for everything.

Sara
xxxxxxxxx

Scarlett1

essexhunny I wish you all the best, stay strong hun cause you have your babies to look after and they need you *hugs*