Complete shock! Please help/ advise!

dib-dab

I am by no means an expert in these things and there are plenty of other people on here who are so I won't attempt to give you advice. But I just had to say that I actually shed a little tear reading your account of your conversation with your girlfriend - I am a big softie but it sounds like you were so lovely to her about it all but at the same time making it very clear that if she betrays your trust again then that will be the end. She is a lucky girl to have you to support her and I hope that you can work together to get rid of her debt quickly so that you can look forward to a great future together with you new baby.

Nargleblast

Hello Anonymousa, glad to see you are getting your thinking gear into action on this - as Never in Doubt says, it might be worth seeing if a deal can be made with any of the creditors to write off the final amounts owing. Once you have established which of the remaining debts have to be addressed, then you can do a Statement of Affairs itemising your monthly household budget and take it from there. It will be a useful exercise anyway, whilst your OH is off on maternity leave and income is reduced. Get her to do this admin stuff with you, though as it is her debt situation and she needs to be able to handle it. Fingers crossed for you both!

Lara44

Just wanted to say NID and Nargle's advice is spot on. If you have funds and are interested in clearing the debts asap you may be able to offer negotiate full and final settlements when the debt is with a DCA. Make sure you deal with the emotional side of this - if you don't talk deeply about it one party might feel resentful or alternatively, patronised.

It is important that your lovely OH also addresses any root causes of getting into debt, and ensures she makes some changes to avoid that happening again. As an example, if she loves buying presents for friends she might get into handcrafting them instead, or using the grabbit board to minimise the cost. MSE is about enabling you to get the best deal for your budget by being a savvy consumer - it's possible for her to still be generous but in an affordable way. Some of the sales/offers/glitches here are amazing!

An soa and a spending diary are both useful in showing her where her money is going if she doesn't already know. Making a realistic budget and including both compromises and treats is a way of building sustainable finances for you both. Welcome Mrs Anonymousa :T

RAS

Anonymousa

You can check the regsitry Trust online for £8 withiut divulging her whereabouts and see if she has a CCJ on any of the debts.

The other things to note are that for debts taken out before April 2007, the CCA must be legally complaint; NIDdy will teach you all there is to kniow about that.

The other thing to pick up on is that is the debt has been sold on (the debt with Westcot almost certainly has) then there is a default letter. If any of the creditors trace your lady, then you need to send a Subject Access Request immediately and get the CCA and Default letter before they get round to taking legal action. You will be able to defend any legal action if either of these documents are faulty.

barbiedoll

If you're new on here (I know you're not but I guess Ms A is!) some of the jargon and abbreviations can be a little confusing. Have a good look through the board, especially helpful are Martin's guides to unmanageable debt; try this link...

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan?dd

For quick reference:

SOA..Statement of Affairs...basically a list of incomings and outgoings. All debt relief charities will request one of these, they can be really helpful to see where the money is going. Practically everyone on here has completed one of these at some point. However, don't let Ms A be bullied into providing this info to debt collecting agencies, they are NOT legally entitled to this, despite what they may say!

CCA...Consumer Credit Agreement..prior to 2007, many credit agreements were poorly worded and certain details were missing, if your OH has one of these, she may be able to avoid paying the debt. Never-in-doubt is the one to speak to regarding these.

SAR...Subject Access Request..This is available from creditors for the princely sum of £10, if you need to see what payments and charges are on the account, this is what you need to ask for, there are template letters on this board. Don't ask for copy statements, banks try to charge around £5 each, you don't need them. Again, there are template letters for SAR's

DCA...Debt Collection Agencies...The nemesis of all DFW's (debt free wannabes) avoid speaking to these people at all costs! All communication must be in writing, as before, template letters are available to send to these [STRIKE]scumbags[/STRIKE] people

And if Ms A is reading these posts, please tell her not to be ashamed or embarassed, none of us here are going to judge her, most of us have been in a similar situation. Glad it's all out in the open, now you can both get on with your lives:T

Nargleblast

Hear hear! Welcome to Ms A, why don't you join us and we will help to get you back on track with advice, sympathy and kicks up the @rse where required! (believe me, my @rse bears plenty of bruises to prove that, as I too have sinned on a monumental scale.)

Anonymousa

After using two searches, the debt is under £10k. That's good news, as I was expecting more! There are three defaults, and several searches on her file. Thanks for your help so far people.

never-in-doubt

Anonymousa wrote: »

After using two searches, the debt is under £10k. That's good news, as I was expecting more! There are three defaults, and several searches on her file. Thanks for your help so far people.

Hiya

Will reply to your PM shortly, bear with me.

Anonymousa

never-in-doubt wrote: »

Hiya

Will reply to your PM shortly, bear with me.

Thanks so much. I know you've got your own life and so on so please don't think I'm taking your help for granted at all.

never-in-doubt

Hiya

Thanks for the explanation via PM/Email - all makes crystal clear sense to me - now time to explain to you, what to do next. Basically all the advice that follows is a step-by-step process and needs to be followed to the letter, in order to work through this, and save you loads of money as well.....

Ok, remember your partner will be doing all this using her address as on the credit file, do not do any of it at your address or it will create a link so stick to the address currently being used (her parents or whetever it is)...

You'll start by sending a SAR to each lender, doing this will allow you to sit and work out the charges that have been applied over the last 6 years, by doing this the debt will reduce significantly, afterwhich we'll look at making F&F Offers dependant upon the balance after the charges have been refunded.

So following the processes below will allow you to do this the correct way:

Step 1

HSBC:
Send a SAR to them (with £10), quoting both account numbers (the bank and card): SAR Request - Advanced Version

HBOS:
Send a SAR to them (with £10) quoting the account number: SAR Request - Advanced Version

Then wait the statutory 40 days, they will reply to the address on file so keep checking post, cos they may write asking for a signature, if they do you'd then come back to me and i'll provide an additional template to send back.

Step 2

Once you have worked out the charges, from the data supplied in the SAR packs you need to go to the relevant link below and follow the processes within them, in order to get the charges refunded (to the account):

a) - For Credit Card charge reclaim - http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/credit-card-charges?dd
b) - For Loan charge reclaim - http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/ppi-loan-insurance?dd
c) - For current account charge reclaim - http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/reclaim/bank-charges?dd

Step 3

You should by now have had offers to settle the charges from the lenders - once you accept them, and they are applied to the relevant accounts you'll have a new grand total for each lender. It is at this point you'll come back to me and i'll advise what to offer each lender as a full and final settlement figure. You cannot do this right now because of the charge reclaims.

Typical F&F Template (for reference at this stage) looks like this: Default Removal - Offer of F&F Settlement

Remember to treat HSBC as two accounts for everything, other than when you request a SAR (a SAR is everything they hold about you, not account specific).

Hope this all makes sense, it is quite easy once you get started, however it does take time - lots of time! Just remember do not ever speak to them on the phone, you must only deal in writing by following the processes above - if you deviate you could cause more damage than good! Just PM me if you get stuck, i'm usually here at least once a day and will reply when I hear from you (you could always email)....

Good Luck - does it make sense to you? :beer: