Disabled student with mental health problems having to quit?

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

WARNING: Sympathy Reserves Exhausted. Permanent Victim Alarm activated.

Walk Away...walk away....walk away....

bestpud

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

WARNING: Sympathy Reserves Exhausted. Permanent Victim Alarm activated.

Walk Away...walk away....walk away....

Yep, that about sums it up! :rotfl:

eira

Practicalities

-small animal charities (look up on the web eg Rain Rescue) They do far more than the big charities to rescue dogs no one else cares about-like pound dogs. Volunteer as a dog walker-these are needed in droves
-ferret rescues may need help with practical care-there's nothing more cheering than a dancing singing ferret, even if they do smell a bit
-local cat shelters sometimes need people just to help with feeding and cleaning
-general animal sanctuaries usually look for practical help
-Wildlife trusts may be on the lookout for volunteers (but be prepared for mud and mess)
-as said there are organisations that look for volunteer English Language tutors (and provide training) This is fantastic work i learnt a lot about fabrics and dressmaking and got treated to some fabulous food)
-it is also amazing how far you can get with coaching qualifications.Don't take long to do and organisations are always on the look out for coaches.If you find a knack with Special Needs kids
you will be much in demand

As I said there are courses (especially if you are near a WEA/University) on wonderful, obscure things.It could lead to a qualification or just open more doors and windows

-

caela_2

bestpud wrote: »

Yep, that about sums it up! :rotfl:

Hahahaha yeah I really want your sympathy and not advice from other users on whether or not I'm entitled to a little support from university. I need action, not sympathy and not people suggesting that because I've got mental health problems I should drop out of university and crawl under a rug somewhere.

caela_2

bestpud wrote: »

When I said about counselling the second time, I was thinking it may be helpful to go over your options rather than have therapy in the normal sense of the word!

Basically discussing the contents of this thread but f2f.

I believe you when you say therapy hasn't worked - it's very obvious why!!

Unfortunately, your attitude is the sort that often undermines progress for people with disabilities. Most don't want to be 'special' as that tends to sway things the other way!

I'm so glad you have such a profound insight as to understand why therapy didn't work- it's a chronic condition there's no cure. There is no way someone with obsessive compulsive disorder can benefit from talking about it all the time in therapy and thus encouraging the obsessions. Therapy made it worse because they kept encouraging me to believe my role was to have contamination issues and blah blah and tell me I had no control over it and to rely on them and doubt myself. Quitting therapy worked wonders for my recovery, the contamination issues disappeared and so did a lot of the external symptoms. Therapy doesn't work because people over here don't know how to administer it properly and I'm sure a wage of over £200 an hour doesn't help propel them towards 'curing' you when they're getting a porsche out of it.

I don't let down people with disabilities, I stand up for them. Do what you want, I'm going to stand up for myself.

There is no more point in you commenting on this thread, since you are just arguing now. You're only angry I chose not to adopt your point of view.

The_One_Who

I think part of the problem here is that you are looking for a 'cure'. For a lot of things it is about finding a way to live with and deal with the problem so that it does not take over your life, not cure it. There are also so many different types of therapy out there, and it is a case of trying to find one that works for you.

Someone with OCD can benefit from therapy, if it is of the right sort for them and they are willing to give it a shot. Nothing will work if you go in expecting it to fail.

bestpud

You assume all therapy involves talking about issues and that is not the case at all. Also, I've had two therapists and neither drove a porche or earned £200 an hour!! Why/where on earth did you pay that much???

I'm not at all angry and I suggest you maybe want me to leave the thread because I'm not making the noises you want to hear. That seems to be your main problem tbh - you want it all your way because you are 'special' and you stamp your feet and sulk if people don't pander to your 'needs'.

I suggested you reconsider uni as you said you were 'having' to leave in your original post - I thought it may be more helpful to explore alternatives and/or cut your losses before you are forced to!

Mostly, you need to grow up and take a chisel to that chip on your shoulder - sorry if the truth hurts but every post you make confirms this some more. Maybe the 'lack of support' has something to do with your selective hearing?

caela_2

bestpud wrote: »

You assume all therapy involves talking about issues and that is not the case at all. Also, I've had two therapists and neither drove a porche or earned £200 an hour!! Why/where on earth did you pay that much???

I'm not at all angry and I suggest you maybe want me to leave the thread because I'm not making the noises you want to hear. That seems to be your main problem tbh - you want it all your way because you are 'special' and you stamp your feet and sulk if people don't pander to your 'needs'.

I suggested you reconsider uni as you said you were 'having' to leave in your original post - I thought it may be more helpful to explore alternatives and/or cut your losses before you are forced to!

Mostly, you need to grow up and take a chisel to that chip on your shoulder - sorry if the truth hurts but every post you make confirms this some more. Maybe the 'lack of support' has something to do with your selective hearing?

The therapists I had were supposedly the best in the country, hence the price. That's private health care for you and don't worry, I didn't pay- my insurance did.

The reason I wanted to abandon this thread is because it’s defeating the original point of helping me decide what kind of support is reasonable and has instead become an argument of pseudo-psychology, whereby people think they are informed enough to make conclusions about my state of mind.

I would like to know why exactly you find my behaviour 'sulking'. I am not sulking, I am in a desperate situation with my future in the balance and am looking to make the correct decision- this is not sulking, it's not whining, it's not posing for attention; it's simply being logical and trying to gain some clarity. I am aware that you don't fully understand how incapable my university is, since you haven't individually addressed any of the facts I have mentioned regarding their disorganisation, for example, the fact that they still haven't managed to send me my results for last year. Now, knowing that everyone else got their results, I can only assume mine were withheld as some form of discrimination. They literally didn't mark most of my work which I only found out after pursuing my investigations. However, much like yourself, they were adamant to imply that I was being pedantic and that it wasn't important and I should look at the bigger picture. Turns out they were just trying to cover themselves.

Many people also maintain that the communication I require from university is for them to email me to let me know I have lectures. I have stated more than once that I simply wish for them to maintain a level of communication to keep me in the loop so that I do not fall behind with my work. Since the nature of my disabilities means that there are times when I am unable to attend, it would be discrimination if they did not put in place the relevant measures to ensure I had an equal shot as other students do. These reasonable measures include informing me of information I may have missed in lectures which is unavailable elsewhere, for instance, when I ask about workshops they could actually tell me when they are. This information is not clearly available on blackboard, as I have stated before, where it took nearly four members of staff to locate the exam arrangements online.

The support they have arranged is all on campus, completely missing the point when my problem is attendance. Furthermore, I asked student services to keep my tutors informed of my situation and even signed a waiver for them to do this, however, I have to explain myself to every lecturer I meet and waste time and face embarrassment, because none of them have been told. It's a general lack of communication, both internally in the university and externally, with their students. The support I required was not beyond reason and should have been implemented. I am aware of my rights and was questioning whether or not they have failed to meet the disability discrimination act. This is hardly me exercising the behaviour of a victim; moreover, it is me fighting for my rights as a well-informed individual.

I hope more people with mental health problems have the self-esteem and confidence to believe they should stand up for themselves, especially when it's so easy to be told 'it's all in your head'.

bestpud

You aren't talking about one or two missed lectures though! You hardly attend at all!

If you cannot actually get into uni then you need to go to student services and make proper arrangements to work from home.

Reasonable adjustments would be you emailing to say sorry you can't get in for the lecture this week and them passing on any notes in accordance with your needs.

You are asking too much when you expect them to email you when you've not turned in for weeks on end and they've had no explanation!

Also, are you really expecting tutors to visit you at home? I don't get why you complain they are not supporting you by sending info about sessions but then you moan you can't get to them anyway!

An occassional email from them just isn't going to make a difference, is it?

You say student support have also failed you but again you've not gone to see them! They would go with you to meet tutors and discuss this but you won't do that.

You are apparently well able to stand up and be counted now but you couldn't do anything to avoid this situation in the first place? Is it easier to contact then with a complaint?

Sooo, I can't answer the assessment issue but I imagine they don't want to waste time marking work for a student who seems to have dropped out! You need to go through the proper channels - you can't just decide which assessments you will do and leave it at that!

I very much doubt it was discrimination - I mean, why would it be? Are you saying they decided to leave out 'the one with the disability'?

I'd say there is more to it than that tbh.

I think you have very little chance if getting your fees returned imo but it's worth a try.

As for the therapy - the 'best' will differ for every client and it's daft to write off future therapy on the basis of one that didn't work for you. Money doesn't always buy the best but that's a different debate I guess.

It seems most people feel you are expecting too much but you don't like that answer so are you going to wait until someone comes along and tells you what you want to hear?

Dave101t

wont be me, bestspud.
seems like they dont have the ability to complete the course and are somehow looking to 'blame' anyone but themselves....buts thats only my professional opinion (a dosser who scraped his 2:2)