Equitable Relationship

poet123

I think that if she is ready at the appointed time then however long she takes to get ready is up to her, if she is 45 minutes late then the issue is not the time taken, but the time she starts toget ready, unless she had other pressing time contrainsts before the lunch appointment with you. If this is a regular thing (the lateness) then I would explain gently that you find it a bit annoying to be kept waiting, and ask her if she could start to get ready earlier so that you are on time.

However, I have to say that what comes across in an undertone here is that you seem a bit spoiled and used to getting your own way, and maybe you are a little piqued that your GF does not kowtow to your every whim and so that is at the root of your annoyance.

blabberwort

considering that so far no matter how many times you have been asked, you have ignored the question about wether she's 45 mins late or wether this is just how long it takes her to get ready. I will therefore assume that as you have ignored the question then it's 45 mins to get ready, not 45 mins late. In which case I genuinely dont see the problem. I also will assume that you have realised that your attitude to her length of time to get ready is unreasonable else you would have jumped in earlier to answer the question.

As for the money situ well I dont see what you have to complain about. You have said that you dont feel she is using you for your money so whats the problem? She cant help that daddy pays you up to £500 a month to have a social life while she has to work hard for hers can she.

I know you wont like my post but then the fact is you shouldnt come on a forum unless you accept that others may have differing views. Personally if my child had the attitude that they do me favors so as good as deserve the money I would flipping well stop it, and make them stand on their own two feet instead of letting them behave like a spoilt brat.

I agree with the other poster, seems to me that your resentful and perhaps this relationship has run it's course if you have these issues already and cant deal with them in an adult way.

Gemmy_2

Your parents pay £500 off your CC every month?!?!
Some uni student you are? Uni's about struggling and teaching you how to stand on your own two feet.

If you were being fair in your relationship its only right you pay for more when you go out. Especially if you can go out that often! Her parents give her what? you haven't mentioned but I'm guessing its not that much a month. Not many parents can afford that.. mine certainly couldn't.

When i was at uni i was lucky if i went out once a month for a nice meal.

45 mins to get ready? shes making herself look nice for you! you'd soon moan if she stopped.

pinkshoes

Danstar wrote: »

To me it feels disrespectful as though my time is less valuable than hers. I don't mind her getting ready but I'm literally sat there in the chair in be room waiting and watching.

Are you saying that you say you'll pick her up at say 8pm, then when you turn up, she then spends 45 mins getting ready, and you have to sit and wait? If that's the case, then she's being rude! She should be ready when you arrive!

If she doesn't bring enough money when she says she'll pay, then why are you stepping in? Does she ASK you to pay? Or do you just step forward?