SAHM to 2 boys Money Diary

Triggles

SAHM - wow! The new stuff in the playroom sounds great!! I wouldn't have thought of recovering the blind - what a brilliant idea!! I have been perusing the clearance curtains for awhile now at B&Q as eventually we will be changing out the Winnie the Pooh curtains in DS3's room for something not only a bit older, but also thicker before winter hits again.

It's always such a big boost to get something like that done, isn't it? A fresh new-looking room!

I have to admit, DH & I have gone round a bit recently too over the double standards - when he's tired, he MUST have a nap, but I'm tired I have to push through. And he's allowed to get stroppy over stuff, but he rather expects me to just move on and not dwell on things. I think some of it is that unconsciously he feels he works harder because he works outside the home, although he'd never actually say that and he swears he doesn't feel that way. After a long discussion about it, he's agreed that it isn't fair on me and promised to be better about it. When push comes to shove, an afternoon of watching both kids on his own while I'm out tends to bring it back into perspective for him about how difficult it can be dealing with two young children. :rotfl: I wonder - when you're exhausted normally, do you just push through and get things done anyway? Because that's what I've always done, so I think it's a bit of a combination that a) DH doesn't REALISE how tired I am, because to him when you're tired, you stop and rest, not keep going. and b) he's used to me just pushing through it so he doesn't question it. I've learned now that (according to DH) I need to TELL him I'm tired and need to rest and then actually LET him take over for a bit - and let him know specifically what would be most helpful for him to do to help me out. Maybe just telling your DH that you're tired and sore and need to give your knee a chance to get better, so he needs to help out more in the meantime?? (Don't know about you, but I will admit that sometimes I expect DH to just "know" when I need help, which is a bit silly....;))

cha97michelle

I know what you mean triggles about pushing through when tired and also not telling them you need help.

The other thing we are guilty of is that i am at home all the time so can see what needs doing and what is annoying me. DH comes in and then says we'll do x this weekend and i get cross as it is not what 'needs' doing. Now he has got in the habit of asking me what our priority is that day.

I also started writing a to do list that was for the weekend. It didn't matter who did it, as long as stuff on the list gets done.

Your knee sounds really sore SAHM. My back is the same at the minute. I hurt it on holiday cycling when i bumped down a curb, and it hasn't been right since. It is painful. DH had a nag at me though as i had not taken any ibuprofen at all for the swelling. Knees can take a while as you put so much stress on them kneeling down with little ones. Please rest it as much as it needs and take care xx

SAHMto2boys

Triggles - I totally push through anything (tired, ill, etc) and just get stuf done. If I don't it won't get done.

I'll be brief because this whole thing does my head in but things will never change with DH. I blow up, he changes for about a week and then it all starts again. He keeps wanting to discuss the latest row and I can't be bothered as nothing will change.

But thanks for yours and Michelles lovely thoughts xx

So after having no children for the past two days (11 till 4 both days) I've managed to paint, re-organise, clean, put up wall stickers and boards for DS's artwork and put everything in its place in the playroom. Just need to make the blind and its done. Looks fabulous I must say!!

Once I'd finished in there today I've given the downstairs a quick tidy, wiped everywhere, mopped, hoovered and done two loads of ironing. Phew, no wonder I'm shattered!

Have also paid the credit card bill today - £1520 off the total, have kept a bit of cash back for buys from Ikea the other day and its DH birthday next week so need a bit of spends for that.

Just been reading Memory Girls thread and I like the idea of her 100 days challange to achieve something. Only thing is what. I don't really have any dreams or fears to conquer but the challange would end just as I start my OU degree so I like the idea of doing something with the summer. Only thing I can think of is have my home just as I want it but that seems a bit shallow maybe? But it would be something that brings my family and I pleasure. Would have to be a very MSE home makeover though!

Quick ideas would be: paint bold wall in kitchen/paint games room/living room - ideas for furniture, sofas, empty space, paint one wall/paint dining room/tidy all cupboards, drawers, shoe cupboard, understairs,wardrobes in spare rooms - BIG job/move DS bedroom/get his old bedroom ready for baby/hange nursery to office when hes old enough/clean guttering for winter/pack up all too small clothing

Had a couple of low spending days with being busy in the house, just needed milk yesterday.

I need to go to local outlet place tomorrow to look for DH's birthday gift and the next town is a mecca for cheap shops and excellent charity shops (one place just sells furniture great for shabby chic) so I'm going to head off there tomorrow while DS is at school and hopefully baby will sleep the way there.

To remind myself need - buy card/mug, party cards x 2, wrap P, buy party gift. Busy week next week with Sports day, DH birthday, DS at two parties, breaking up from school.

Triggles

SAHM - sorry - hope things settle down for you a bit. I like the idea of a 100days challenge as well. Not a clue what I'd do. I'll be watching with interest to see what you decided - all of your ideas that you mentioned sound brilliant! And what a boost - to get something so visual as redecorating done as you will see it and be reminded of it every day! Good luck!

SAHMto2boys

Triggles - glad you like the house idea! It would be lovely to see it slowly improving. Don't get me wrong its nice as it is but its not how I want it so I think a few tweaks and I'll be happy.

Good day so far. Going to list my good points as it'll be easier

• Went and got DH's gift from the outlet place, mentioned to him I was shopping today so bless him, he gave me a fiver to have a bit of lunch out with the baby. I went into Starbucks and had a lovely coffee and a toastie but the toastie hadn't arrived after 10 minutes so I asked one if the workers and they had basically forgot it. So she sorted it and gave me another coffee to drink while I ate so result there - although I'm not a huge coffee drinker so I'm a bit buzzie on two 'proper' cups!
• Found loads of Thomas the Tank stuff in B&M at 50% to 80% less than normal so got some bits for DS to put away
• Can only use Bold wash powder for DS and DH skin, some in HB cheap so brought that and some soda crystals and my 25 washers box is full for £3 (but will get more washers out than that)
• Recovered the playroom blind - its okay, not as professional as before but its fine and I honestly don't think you can tell whats been done to it
• DH did the school run this morning so managed to do all my jobs before going out, dried one load of washing under gazebo as its winding but showers

Think thats it. Off out later to a friends, erm....adult themed party:rotfl::rotfl::o never been to one before so slightly weary but should be fun anyway. Need to pick up a bottle to take.

pennywisepoundstupid

Have fun tonight, i went to one ages ago, friend was having a Ann Summers one, thing is i still sat there and thought i wonder if they are on quidco and what % would i get:rotfl:.

cha97michelle

I don't think your house idea is shallow. I am going to try and lose a couple of stone, and that is the same sort of idea. If the house is as you want it you will be free to concentrate on your study.

I am realising there is a fair bit in my life i am not entirely happy with, so quite a bit of thinking of how to shake myself out of it.

Well done on all you achieved today, and hope you enjoy the party.x

SAHMto2boys

Had a good night at the party - I won £40 to spend in the raffle. Have choosen something I can Ebay:rotfl:

Both boys are having a nap so next post is my 100 day challenage goals.

Will edit this post after.

SAHMto2boys

100 Day Challenge Goals

Personal
1. Alcohol free days 6/72
2. Once a week date night with DH 1/14
3. Work outs 3/30 Ab workouts 2

Family
1. Cook one new receipe a week 1/14
2. Organise Christmas and birthday gifts - exisiting/make list of needed/shop for/wrap
3. Give each son half an hour quality time per day (on top of usual play/time spent together) DS1 7/100 DS2 8/100

Financial
1. Pay off debt!!
2. Do 25 positive MS things 0/25
3. NO buying clothes for 100 days!! 9/100
4. Stick to budget!
5. NSDs 1/25

House
1. Paint kitchen wall
2. Paint games room
3. living room - A. ideas for furniture B. sofas C. empty space D. paint one wall
4. paint dining room to match living room
5. tidy all cupboards (some kitchen ones done/boys wardrobes done)
6. tidy all drawers (dining room sidetable done)
7. [STRIKE]organise shoe cupboard[/STRIKE]
8. tidy and organise understairs
9. tidy wardrobes in spare rooms - BIG job
10. clean guttering for winter
11. pack up all too small clothing
12. storage for photos

SAHMto2boys

Seems like the challenge list is coming together for me. Nothing earth shattering but things I think will help me feel happier, will keep updating the running totals tp keep track of where I'm at. I'm really trying to be positive and keep the good thoughts going and I really think its helping with my well-being (without trying to sound to like a hippy!). Just seems to be easier to see the good at the minute and thats when some poo is flying my way too. The whole situation with the 'toxic friend' is rearing its head but I'm refusing so far to be drawn in. We are grown women with children and I really, really don't want to waste any further energy on the matter. Sometimes in life people don't get along, accept it, be polite and move on. Done!

The main thing for me will be to see if I can not buy any clothes for 100 days. Stupid but that is a massive area for me, even just £5 in Primark and I'm happy but its the £5 and then £5 more and then £5 more thats the problem so hopefully I can achieve 100 days (erm.....) or at least mininal spends in this area. Didn't even venture into a clothes shop today and there were plently of sales on too.

Been into town this morning to get DH's last birthday things and took DS1 with me. The council were running a little fun thing so we spent half an hour there together this morning which he enjoyed, picked up some leaflets too about things going on over the summer. Boys are sleeping out this evening as DH and I are having a meal out for his birthday - really looking forward to it!

Have just done two surveys and checked the balance - coming up to £7.50 so not too far off claiming a voucher.

Right better go pack boys bags.