The cutting out/cutting down alcohol thread (part 7)

eselt

Jo- great boots!!!

I know what you mean about lessons learnt, but you can't put an old head on young shoulders. When I was that age getting drunk was all a big joke, if people were sick and did stupid things it would be the subject of gossip for days and we all did it again the next weekend. Mind you I don't remember drinking spirits or wine in those days- mainly woodpecker cider and lager!!!. When I see the youngsters (especially the girls) walking around with bottles of vodka, drinking them BEFORE they go on to pubs and clubs I feel like snatching it off them and yelling THIS IS HOW I STARTED..LET ME TELL YOU WHERE I ENDED UP, but I know they won't believe me, think they are invincible, think I'm just a mad middle age busy body etc.

Hope your daughter feels better later on Jo.

115k- Brilliant that you feel a little better today, hope psych's are able to offer some help that relieves your distress. You need some serious help for the SH now I think, don't be ashamed, make sure you mention it and ask for advice. Please try to get help when you do SH, although you have a supportive OH, bandaging your wounds up and sleeping on it isn't really going to help long term. Keep posting, we're not experts but we can offer you support and encouragement and a friendly environment.

Have a good bank holiday everyone- off into the garden now, ex-OH is coming round to mow the grass- I give it 2 1/2 minutes before we start bickering but at least it will be done!

Bismarck

Hi all,

It's been a week and a nice lovely site!

WOW

I read a few bits of a book last week in a shop about the effects of alcohol on children of people who over-do it.

It affects so much...even down to how they form relationships later in life....will my mum/dad be around or are they preoccupied with drink. Kids get to know whether you are actually there for them or not...and are sometimes left feeling abandoned, even if you're under the same roof because the adults thoughts have drifted to the liquid master.

I knew I had to stop but I'm still astonished about how uch har it can do in the wrong hands.

Some of you can have the 2right amount" and get along nicely. Possibly better than without any alcoho---that's up to you.

For me - I love the idea of always being there for the kids if I need to be.

I love the idea that I can really push myself and not be held back by what I did/said/consumed the night before.

Each day comes only once. I want to make the most of my life.

Take care everyone!

Be true to yourselves.

Bis

honeybear_2

I am drinking too much atm as I have a thing on my mind & I'm not dealing with it.

Apols for the bluntness of that but, for me, admitting something is the first step to dealing with it.

ps.it's nothing to do with what I posted about a week or so ago

SimIsOnTheUp

Hi Honeybear, sorry to hear you're having a difficult time.

Hope things get better soon.

Sim x

SimIsOnTheUp

Hi guys,

What a f@cker this booze is.

I'd been 2 weeks and 1 day sober, up until last Wednesday, when I had my session with the lady at the Substance Misuse Team.

She's great. Session was great, but it brought up a whole shed load of stuff, as these things do.

Substance Misuse lady even asked me if I wanted to go on Antibuse..

After 3 days, and nights (Wed, Thurs, and Friday) of solid drinking, until I blacked out, I'm now seriously considering going on it / going into rehab.

This is depressing admitting this - last Wednesday, I withdrew £70 from the cash machine (the last £70 in my bank), until next / this Friday.

Ended up bumping into old friends from the drinking days (sounds like a contradiction in terms), and then drinking until about 3am at a club, where I lost of mate of 10 years. (This is one of those mates, who as much as I love him, only calls when he want to go out, and get hammered - he hasn't called me back since..)

Last Thursday, I had about £20 left (good going for me), and I sensibly decided to spend half on more booze at my local pub, and the other half on a train fare -

Got said train (and drank on train) to a nearby City, and sold my Apple iPhone 3 GS for the ridiculously !!!! price of £180. This is the 4th / 5th gadget I've sold (to fund my drinking), over the last couple of years. Desperate and stupid eh? :-/

With this £180, I then got proceeded to spend it on booze all day and night Thursday, wasting £40 of it on a hotel I couldn't afford either.

Carried on drinking Friday morning, when I left the hotel, and all day Friday.

Got train back, (drank on train) and met my Girlfriend at mine around 5pm Friday evening.

Took a torrent of verbal abuse of her, and kept my mouth shut.

Madly, ended up drinking with her Friday night, and have spent the days since then with the sweats, shakes and horrific nightmares.

I am at a loss for words, as to just how much grip the booze has over me, and I don't know what to do next.

Can't believe I sold my phone, and wasted all that money.

Woke up Friday night / Saturday morning, having some kind of mini seizure type fitting. Scary as f@ck. Thank God my Girlfriend was here.

Haven't been out all weekend.

GF left early this morning, for London, as she's staying with her friends down there, and they're then off on holiday in Dublin from Tuesday - Thursday. She's back on Friday.

Sorry for such a bonkers, depressing post.

I just really needed to see this written down, as I want to focus this week, on getting professional help from Susbtance Misuse (I see her again this Wednesday), and staying sober.

AA doesn't work for me, as they don't address the underlying issues, behind why people drink.

AA to me, only skims the service, of 'not picking up the first drink' (if only it were that easy!), and if you do disagree with their approach, and try to stay sober from other methods, AA seem to almost pathologise dissent.

I would go back, as I have a few friends in AA, but I have too much pride, and the cliquey nature of the 'fellowship' stresses me out, more than it helps.

Hope you are all much more clear headed and happy.

Cheers - Sim x

mollypolly

Hi Guys,
Just got back from a lovely weekend in London with DD2.
We had a fabulous time and made some wonderful memories.
We went to the theatre to see Phantom of the Opera and had tea at Wheelers of St James (which is owned by Marco Pierre White:D)

19 years ago my mum took me to see Phantom of the Opera and we had the best time ever so I wanted to do the same for my daughter.

I am sorry to see so many of you struggling on here at the moment and just want to wish you all the best with your cutting down/giving up.

Take care of YOU!!!!!!
Love Mollypollyxxxx

honeybear_2

Sim, thanks for the good wishes

Please find yourself something that works for you asap. I have no experience of AA bar what I read (on here & other places). If it doesn't work for you then fair enough but it really sounds like the Substance Abuse lady is enough for you. Please take care

Molls, glad you had a nice time in my fair city

SimIsOnTheUp

Molly -

Glad you and your daughter had a good time in London

Honeybear -

Thanks. The lady at the CMHT Substance Misuse Team was great, and I need to try something - anything - to help me stop going back to the drink.

I've been having these very strange, worrying sensations in my head, since the bender.

Am worried the drinking is really starting to affect my head.

Feel sort of 'not here' and confused :-(

Sim x

Marru

Hello - I am back! Had fantastic day :j and I think I beat my target time but the results are not up yet on their website. No time to read now but will be back later, off to buy some pizza for tea

honeybear_2

Sim, after all that I'd be surprised if you didn't feel weird. Try to get some water into your system, some decent food & some fresh air - small things but they all help