FLIGHT DISRUPTIONS: Volcano ash from Iceland hits UK flight plans

Incapuppy

Latest news:

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/%27i-can%27t-come-into-work-because-of-the-volcano%27-201004152642/


I CAN'T COME INTO WORK BECAUSE OF THE VOLCANO' 15-04-10 THOUSANDS of people across Britain are planning an early start to the weekend today as the Icelandic volcano presented them a fascinating new excuse.

'There is actual lava in my house'

Innovative shirkers are claiming that ash from the massive eruption 800 miles north of the British Isles has interfered with electrics in their car, or obscured their view of the bus stop.

Julian Cook, a sales manager from Peterborough, said: "It's very bad here. You can't see your hand in front of your face. In fact, I'm not 100% sure I still have hands. If I do I'll see you on Monday, probably."

Helen Archer, an accounts assistant from Stevenage, phoned her office to say that she would not make it in because her only pair of volcano-proof shoes are currently being repaired.

She added: "There's quite a lot of lava running up and down my street. Normally that would be okay because my Nine West pumps have a special anti-lava attachment, but unfortunately they are in the process of being cobbled. Good day."

The eruption has also stranded thousands of Londoners after tube drivers claimed volcanic ash in the upper atmosphere makes it impossible to drive a train through a tunnel.

Vulcanologists say the eruption has been caused by increasing pressure in magma chambers beneath the North Atlantic Plate, while leading economists claim it is nothing more than churlish, volcano-based revenge for Britain seizing the assets of Iceland's pathetic little banks.

Meanwhile there are growing fears that the massive ash cloud may be unable to prevent tonight's party leaders' TV debate.

Gordon Brown has accused the Tories of a 'do-nothing' approach to volcanoes, while Lib Dem treasury spokesman Vince Cable has chartered a steam boat to Reykjavik, promising to put all the ash and lava back in to the big hole in the middle.

Despite last minute appeals the debate is now likely to go ahead at 8.30pm and then take up at least 45 minutes of Friday morning as millions of non-volcano affected voters come into work armed with a series of teeth-grindingly vacuous observations.

Tom Logan, from Finsbury Park said: "Yeah, I've been telling people I'm definitely going to watch it but I'm not. I'm going to watch a DVD about freaks while eating a bucket of M&S cocktail sausages.

"I'll let you know how it turns out."

Incapuppy

moneypooh wrote: »

All Heathrow & Stanstead flights cancelled from midday!

Ryanair flights ex Stansted cancelled from 09.00 departures onwards

Gorgeous_George

I spoke to a vulcanologist and asked for advice. His reply was 'It's life Jim but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it.'

GG

nico26

TBeckett100 wrote: »

hopefully ok for sunday as we are flying out of gatwick to the canaries.

Was speaking to my son in Gibraltar there. He was saying Easy Jet passenger told him they have cancelled all their flights to Gibraltar till Saturday.

Prepare for the onslaught.

jammin_2

Mr_Lahey wrote: »

Iceland - Arguably the worlds most pointless nation after Wales.

I don't necessarily agree, but I LOLd. :rotfl:

bagand96

In addition to the 'right to care' airlines are obliged to refund your fare or re-route you (at your option) in the event of cancellation and after 5 hours in the case of delay

While its all wel and good that it is the passengers choice whether to be refunded or rerouted, UK Airspace is closed. As in, no planes. Officially until 6pm but already looking like that could be midnight or even roll into tomorrow.

I don't think anybody will be rerouted today, or even tomorrow!

deegee999

"Innovative shirkers are claiming that ash from the massive eruption 800 miles north of the British Isles has interfered with electrics in their car, or obscured their view of the bus stop.

Julian Cook, a sales manager from Peterborough, said: "It's very bad here. You can't see your hand in front of your face. In fact, I'm not 100% sure I still have hands. If I do I'll see you on Monday, probably"

:DLike that one, I'm in at work in peterborough so I'm just off to get my coat. Mr lahey you are so fight:rotfl:

shoppaholic_returns

For Goodness Sake its CASH they owe us, not ASH!!!:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Gilliana

My flight from Edinburgh to Pisa was cancelled today :-( Have spent the morning cancelling car hire, car parking, and finally managed to get rebooked for Saturday, but that's two days less for my holiday. No food in fridge because I'd run it down, dog not here because he's at the sitter and the house is too quiet. Not sure what to do with myself. Gym? Guess I'd best go buy some milk.

mozzer251

My wife is stuck in Rome. Jet 2 offering either money back or a seat on Sunday. Thats all.

Travel insurance? - as check-in had not happened then its with the airline to sort out.