Please help - disgusting poo problem

smileyt_2

Hi

I didn't know who else to ask about this but as you all are the fount of all wisdom I thought I would post this here. Warning - if you are easily grossed out, don't read any further.

This afternoon an elderly male friend visited me. He asked to use my bathroom and I inwardly groaned because he always wees on the floor and I always have to clean it after he has used it. Anyway, to cut a long story short, this afternoon he also - how shall I say it - needed to evacuate his bowels.

After using the toilet, he came downstairs, said his goodbyes and left straight away. He smelled horrendously of faeces and so did the house. I went upstairs to clean the bathroom and to my horror he had defecated on my floor, trodden in it and walked it all down the stairs and across the living room.

I have scrubbed all the carpets with hot water and bleach and they smell ok. The problem is the bathroom floor. I have scrubbed it with those sponge scrubbies (well, I used several) and mopped it with a strong bleach solution three times. However the faeces are ingrained ( I live in a housing association house and the lino is cheap stuff with a rough finish, I ask you!). I have a really sensitive sense of smell and this plus of course the hygiene factor is knocking me sick. At the moment I have sprayed the floor liberally using the shower and sprayed biological odour eliminator on it (stuff I got from the vet for when my dogs have 'accidents' - although theirs have never been as bad as this!).

What else can I do to get rid of this? Please help!

I am trying to phone my friend and tell him how upset I am about this. Anyone can have an accident, and I understand he must have been embarrassed, but to not say anything and leave me to clean up afterwards is not on.

Any suggestions would be gratefully received. Would bicarbonate of soda do the trick?

gunsandbanjos

Maybe sprinkle the bicarb to ' soak it up ', then maybe hoover it?

And next time he comes over pretend you are out:eek: Honestly who does that in someone elses house!!

meritaten

try the bicarb but for the Carpets i would give them a thorough scrub with biological washing powder - might work for the hard surfaces too. let them dry before using the bicarb though.
I do feel for you smileyt, this behaviour reminds me of when my nan was alive, she had alzhiemers and her bladder and bowel control went and she used to smear it everywhere like playdoh.
I would be strongly tempted to say tell your friend he isnt welcome anymore, but its your home not mine. do you know WHY he is doing this???

Sagaris

Carpet shampooer and steam cleaner I reckon! How horrible for you, I know he must have felt embarrassed, but I don't think I'd be in a rush to invite him back anytime soon.

Nargleblast

Sounds like your friend might have some form of dementia because most "normal" people would not do such a thing. Do you know what his own home is like? If he cannot use a toilet properly and keep himself clean then clearly he needs help - perhaps you should talk to Social Services? If he really cannot cope with looking after himself then he could be in danger of illness and injury.

As far as the mess and smell in your home is concerned, I am not sure what to advise. You might have to rip up the bathroom flooring and lay down new tiles or something.

gunsandbanjos

Sagaris wrote: »

Carpet shampooer and steam cleaner I reckon! How horrible for you, I know he must have felt embarrassed, but I don't think I'd be in a rush to invite him back anytime soon.

Probably, but if i had accidentally crapped on someones floor and then stood in it. The polite thing to do would be to remove your shoes and not tramp it all the way through their house! At least apologise, if he is very elderly then he may not have been able to help clear it up, but i'm sure the OP would have been slightly less angry if he had told her and apologised.

gunsandbanjos

Nargleblast wrote: »

Sounds like your friend might have some form of dementia because most "normal" people would not do such a thing. Do you know what his own home is like? If he cannot use a toilet properly and keep himself clean then clearly he needs help - perhaps you should talk to Social Services? If he really cannot cope with looking after himself then he could be in danger of illness and injury.

This is very good advice, i have no experience of dementia so can't really comment on its possible manifestations but it does seem a very odd thing for someone to do.

smileyt_2

Meritaten, sorry to hear about your nan, how distressing.

I don't think he is getting dementia - he always seems very much 'all there'. I think he has a faecal incontinence problem and couldn't reach the toilet in time. He did know he had done something though, because on the way out he said, "You need to throw your toilet roll away," and when I asked why he replied, "You just do." I was a bit alarmed that I couldn't find the loo roll in the bathroom and I found it .... downstairs, hanging off the handlebar of my bike. :eek: If it wasn't so disgusting it would be very funny. I don't know what possessed him to carry a sh***y looroll downstairs and hang it on my bike!!! You couldn't make it up.

I am going to advise him to see his doctor and look into incontinence pads on the grounds that it would be better for everyone. He has been having medical investigations but nothing has turned up.

I think I am going to have to turn the bathroom radiator off .... it's freezing here and I need the heating on but the smell of a warm bathroom is just horrendous. Sorry if that was too much information.

And yes, gunsnbanjos, I would definitely have been less angry if he had told me what he had done, and taken his shoes off.

He went home on the bus, too - goodness only knows what the other passengers must have thought. I bet he had a seat to himself though!

I think I will try the steam cleaner and biological washing powder option. Thanks all for replying.

soappie

smileyt - the leaving the loo roll on the handlebar of the bike is not ... rational...

Dementia starts in little ways. It's not necessarily obvious at the beginning and sufferers will still have mostly continuous and lucid brain processes. But, there will be the odd tell tale sign. Such as leaving the loo roll on the handle bar of a bike.. It's a slow, degenerative thing.

The poor man needs some help xxx

carefullycautious

Has this happened before?

I cant believe you dont think there is something wrong with him. Nobody behaves like this in someone elses home do they?

I would be mortified if this happened.

I certainly would not be inviting him back especially as he was aware of what he had done. Who carries a dirty toilet roll downstairs and hangs it from the handles of your bike.

smileyt_2

I've just spoken to him in a very uncomfortable conversation. He didn't know - as far as he was aware he had managed to use the toilet normally but he did admit he had a problem in this department. He apparently didn't notice that he had trodden in it and walked it through my house. He did agree to go back to his doctor after Easter though.

He also said he'd been to church tonight and the person he was sitting next to hadn't offered him a lift home (which she normally would have done) and he couldnt' understand it. I had to explain to him that if he hadn't changed his clothes he was probably still smelly.

He was mortified and now I feel awful, but it had to be said. I wasn't nasty but I said to him he was going to have to start checking his surroundings and his clothing when he had been to the toilet.

He did apologise profusely but he was obviously mortified and quite defensive and couldn't wait to get off the phone, not surprisingly. I dare say I would have felt the same way.

Anyway .... I shall toddle off back upstairs to see if the odour eliminator has done its job ....