Nice people thread 2 - now even nicer

lostinrates

DH is definite a husband Yes, I'm fine, and he's coping, as his his cousin. Funeral won't be this week I don' think. I guess now we just are there for cousin and DH has to decide what he wants to do next (his aunt asked him to move in with her for weekdays after she was widowed last year so he left his other place.)

carolt

Sounds complicated; best wishes to DH and family.

LydiaJ

Carol, you are describing how I feel about my house most of the time. It really gets me down, so I feel for you.

After late-nearly-ex died, the housework got on top of me even more than it used to - kids with me all the time now instead of going to Daddy every other weekend and giving me a chance to catch up. So I eventually got a cleaner. She comes on Tuesdays. This means that I can feel reasonably OK about my house once a week on Tuesday evenings. The cost of this is that every Monday night I have to make sure it is tidy enough for her to clean, so Monday nights get me down more than ever.

I know that the only long term solution to my problems is to get rid of a lot of the clutter. I had plenty of my own even before late-nearly-ex died, and now have most of his house contents in my garage waiting for me to deal with it. But I am not getting very far with it, and the kids and I all seem to create more clutter faster than I can keep up with it. When I am up to it, I find the decluttering thread on Old Style helpful.

Hope you feel better soon. You are certainly not alone in finding it hard.

carolt

Totally - with you on the cleaner and the clutter. Must be v hard to deal with on one's own, too. Old Style has loads of threads where people with magic children trained to do chores since the age of 3, sweep, clean, dust etc in earnest rotation.

Mine don't - they mess. Little one messes fastest.

I am really, really trying to declutter - getting rid of stuff, but it is slow. Desperate to do a car boot soon (before the season ends) - have boxes and boxes of stuff ready to go, but weekends are just ridiculously hectic at the moment. Hopefully soon.

You know there are people with immaculate households, I've just never, ever been one of them personally.

Read a lovely bit of Cider With Rosie on holiday - Laurie Lee was talking about his mother and how wonderful she was, and about how astonishingly messy his house was when growing up in a big family; how it wasn't until he grew up and left home that he met people and went to their houses and was astonished to discover clear floor, with no 'stuff' on it! Much like my house. But he talked movingly about how his mother had awakened in him a passion for life, a vivid way of living... Maybe our children lose out on the minimalist neatness, but gain on the richness of experience?

I hope so.

GDB2222

Ellie2758 wrote: »

Pastry case? Or sponge flan? If the latter, yum.........:p

Shortcrust pastry. My wife said you can buy them ready-made, which seems a really good idea.

vivatifosi

lostinrates wrote: »

DH is definite a husband Yes, I'm fine, and he's coping, as his his cousin. Funeral won't be this week I don' think. I guess now we just are there for cousin and DH has to decide what he wants to do next (his aunt asked him to move in with her for weekdays after she was widowed last year so he left his other place.)

Apologies lir, I don't know how I missed your mentioning this. I skim a lot as doing other stuff while on here, so sorry if I miss bits and come across as uncaring. I hope all goes well with the funeral.

My house is untidy too. I have an untidy house and an untidy mind. I'm very envious of those with minds like filing cabinets and houses like showhomes.

sss555s

You sound like your chasing your tail carolt.

You need to sit down, make a thought out list in order then tick them off as you do them.

Washing in the machine, wash the dishes, clean the work tops, vacuum what's needed, dust, take the washing out of the machine, tumble dry or hang up, put another load in and dry and put the dishes away....

PasturesNew

My ideal house has the following:
- Bedroom, ceiling to floor, wall to wall deep sliding door fronted wardrobe space. Everything will go in here.
- Somewhere in the house, ceiling to floor, wall to wall deep sliding door fronted cupboard. Everything will go in here.
- Pantry, not a cupboard. Proper big pantry with continuous shelves because cupboards limit what can go in them, so stuff ends up everywhere. Everything will go in here.

So, that then leaves an empty house, except one or two bits of blow up furniture. I saw a lovely blow up bed in the Aldi leaflet this week, only £40!! If I had a house I'd have bought one straight away: http://www.aldi.co.uk/uk/html/offers/special_buys3_15732.htm

It's only ever just me, so I hate furniture that's big and heavy.... so it'll be the blow up life for me!

Job done.

Malcolm.

Very sorry to hear about aunt lir. I hope she's at peace sleeping or in a better place.

My house is a constant mess. Have an armada of well organised boxes in the garage and loft and still not tidy. I think a couple of trips to the charity shop and skip needed.

Mentally I'm exhausted from technical reading. If anyone knows of something (legal) to improve energy levels, memory or cognitive function - I'm all ears.

carolt

sss555s wrote: »

You sound like your chasing your tail carolt.

You need to sit down, make a thought out list in order then tick them off as you do them.

Washing in the machine, wash the dishes, clean the work tops, vacuum what's needed, dust, take the washing out of the machine, tumble dry or hang up, put another load in and dry and put the dishes away....

Sadly, can't really focus on that - wish I could...

DS is being 'settled gently' into reception by doing part days. What this has meant in practice is that I've had to pick him up uber early for the last few weeks - as we now live far away, it's 2 buses and about 1.5 hrs by bus each way. So 3 hours out of the middle of my day.

Plus I have a load of papers to write and imminent Chief Examiner meetings...but too many little things going on to allow me to focus on the writing.

Plus all the home-moving admin - changing address on a million different forms for 5 people.

Plus gradually sorting out/getting rid of stuff from moving.

Plus trying to act as a vr/maths tutor, as per a few pages back.

Plus inordinate number of school events currently at evenings/weekends...just seems non-stop.

But a cat chasing its tail is exactly what I feel like.

Have lists, but terrifyingly long, so overwhelming. Even lir's 10 things sounds more than I can handle. Too little sleep, don't know which to do first...too many balls I'm scared of dropping...

Eurgh.

Time to calm down. A nice herbal tea, I think... (goes off to make one)