£100,000 Debt "club"

Emmzi

Debtomaniak wrote:

So my hubby is not the only one then? He probably had about 5 interviews in the last couple of month, all with good feedback, but there always seems to be someone else better.

Good god no.. and I *know* I'm fabulous and interview well! (only cos I'm a highly trained interviewer! lol)

Sometimes they just have a 'type' they are looking for, or a really specific bit of experience someone else has.

It's just a numbers game. The important thing is to keep the volume of applications up and keep plugging away. eventually, he'll hit that needle in a haystack.

Do keep believing in him. He needs that.

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

Good god no.. and I *know* I'm fabulous and interview well! (only cos I'm a highly trained interviewer! lol)

Sometimes they just have a 'type' they are looking for, or a really specific bit of experience someone else has.

It's just a numbers game. The important thing is to keep the volume of applications up and keep plugging away. eventually, he'll hit that needle in a haystack.

Do keep believing in him. He needs that.

I have done such a terrible thing this morning. I lost it with him. He said "what am I doing wrong? Why can't I get the job? Am I thick?"

And what did I do?????

I just shouted my throat out at him. I said lots of horrible things, I told him it is getting me down as well, and I am tired of everything and why can he not get a job at the supermarket stucking shelves if he wants to work. And I was so bad, could not stop, just told him we had to put house up for sale immediately..... and so on. What a horrible horrible wife I am. I have made him cry. I feel like a poo now. I have appologised to him times and times again, but probably done some damage to our relationship, he is probably thinking I am going to leave him.... I have been misarable for the past few days, could not help myself. Guess this is when it gets tuff and I failed to be there for him... Sorry, ...

Emmzi

Hun,

on page one of this thread, hubby wouldn't talk about debt, and wouldn't 'get off his backside' about it. Now you're having the house valued. It's progress. But you can't be sweet and light all the time .. bottling up your feelings isn't good for you.

don't beat yourself up about losing your rag. And don't apologise too much.. give it some time to sink in with him.

You can be angry about what he has done, but still love *him*. Make sure he knows the difference.

And if you want him to get a job.. "give a dog a good name and he'll live up to it." Let him know you believe he can get something worthwhile. It'll make the process easier on both of you.

However he does need some targets to motivate himself! I go for 4 applications a week. Sometimes they aren't my dream job, but if dream job isn't there, I have to take next best.

And if he isn't working at the moment.. he should be retraining. Work or study or volunteering is kinda what I go by.. I have to be doing at least one out of the three purely for my own self esteem.

h4nym

Emmzi / Debtomaniak

Interesting watching the thread here - I'm also a contractor in the IT market! It's a bit easier for me in that we have some investments in property and a software company that we started some years ago and is now producing profits of about 5k per month. Irritatingly, though, we had to sustain losses of up to over 250k until we finally started to generate more cash than it was costing. That was all funded by my going out onto the contract market. Once cash did turn the corner, I left the contract market and went full time into the business. And racked up 120k in debt in the process. The light bulb moment was just over a year ago. After a bit of toing and fro-ing (prepping the firm for my departure etc) I put myself back onto the market and was fortunate to land a role pretty quickly. It paid relative peanuts... but it was regular predictable money. Since then, I've completed that and another and am about to embark on my third and the money's massively better. In the interim, we've spent every single penny my contracting has delivered on reducing our debts and we're now down to our last - a balance of 23k with Egg. That now equates to two months earnings and with the same focus we'll be debt-free by my 40th birthday at the end of October. It does kinda help that the market is buzzing at the moment, but make hay an' all that.

Anyway - I've had a look at your CV and it's not easy to pick out the jewels. Some words of advice:

1. An interviewer last year commented that "wow - he'd never seen a 7 page CV" An agent confirmed that everyone's extremely interested in what you did last, less interested in what you did 3 years ago and absolutely uninterested in anything more than about 7 years old. So - my CV is now only 5 pages long, and doesn't bother with anything older than 1996.

2. With extensive experience to portray, put a summary page on! Give people the chance to snapshot your CV in the 20 seconds they'll give it. My CV is set out with the summary page first, personal details on page 2 and then 3-5 is the detail on the roles mentioned in the summary.

xxx xxxx – Infrastructure & Data Centre Project Manager

A highly experienced and qualified Technical Project Manager with excellent Infrastructure and Data Centre skills.

Tel: xxxxx Mobile: xxxxx eMail: xxxx@xxxx

Key Personal Details
Age: 39
Resides: SW London / Surrey
Full Driving Licence Holder Languages:
Mother Tongues: English, Arabic
Fluent: French
Good Business level: Spanish, Italian, Dutch

Project Management Experience: 14 years
Infrastructure: 7 years
Comms & Networking: 7 years
Data Centre Relocations: 3 years
Industry Experience:
Telecommunications/IT: 3 years
Pharmaceuticals: 4 years
Energy: 3 years
Financial & Professional Services: 4 years

Key Technical Skills Key Project Management Skills
LAN/MAN/WAN Networking & Telecoms,
Server Operations Management
Data Centre operations and relocation Prince 2 Practitioner, APM Practitioner (APMP) Qualified
Team Management (up to 15 direct staff)
Budget Management (up to £18 million)
Business Analysis
Risk & Change Management
3rd Party Supplier Management

Key Skills and Recent Contracting Experience

Employer Contract Dates Role Key Technologies used
xxxx
London
https://www.xxx.co.uk
January 2005 – July 2006 Data Centre Implementation and Relocation Programme Manager Microsoft Server technologies
Microsoft Operations Manager
Cisco
Microsoft Virtual Server
VMWare ESX Server
MAN & WAN dark fibre
Citrix
Prince 2 Project Management
ITIL Service Management

etc... it's difficult to show how it's laid out, and I'd be happy to send it to anyone that asks in a pm, but it doesn't half help.

I'm now at the point where I have 3 offers on the table and a dinner date with my wife to work out which one's the one to go for.

My advice? Get a really good CV together - listen to every single piece of advice you come across! I have this article bookmarked.
Then - set your sights low enough to guarantee you get something - anything. My first role last year only paid £280 a day. The next one will be in the range of 500-535 per day depending on which one I take. Doesn't take too many of those days to pay off even a 120k debt.

We've recently had to consider whether it is time to loosen the purse strings a little. I've been absolutely implacable - nope - we keep our focus and pay every last penny off. There's only a couple of months to go. Then we can start saving for the extension!

Finally - chin up! An interview is a sales opportunity! You have to shine! So shine! Of one thing I'm certain - like I know my wife and mother love me - your husband, Debtomaniak, is also dearly loved by his wife too.

Like I said - happy for you to PM me if you want to see my CV - there's another couple of other little things that I'd be happy to discuss with you!

Good luck

H

chivers1977

The CV to me on first glance and as a non-recruitment person looks a bit long and scary with so much information in it. Would it be worth getting a careers adviser to pare it down a bit. I used to manage a bank branch -I know way below the level of his jobs - and TBH if I received a Cv with that much info, I wouldn't be bothered to read it.

I am sure everything will be OK with your OH. Maybe it will give him that extra "kick" to get going.....

Debtomaniak

Emmzi wrote:

Hun,

on page one of this thread, hubby wouldn't talk about debt, and wouldn't 'get off his backside' about it. Now you're having the house valued. It's progress. But you can't be sweet and light all the time .. bottling up your feelings isn't good for you.

don't beat yourself up about losing your rag. And don't apologise too much.. give it some time to sink in with him.

You can be angry about what he has done, but still love *him*. Make sure he knows the difference.

And if you want him to get a job.. "give a dog a good name and he'll live up to it." Let him know you believe he can get something worthwhile. It'll make the process easier on both of you.

However he does need some targets to motivate himself! I go for 4 applications a week. Sometimes they aren't my dream job, but if dream job isn't there, I have to take next best.

And if he isn't working at the moment.. he should be retraining. Work or study or volunteering is kinda what I go by.. I have to be doing at least one out of the three purely for my own self esteem.

Thank you. That is exactly what I have been saying to him, but he thinks that he is too old to study or take on some course. I suggested him to retrain as an electrician or a plumber, there seem to be a shortage and they seem to be well paid. Or even accountancy, I said I would help him to study, but every time I suggest something, he has a negative answer for me, think that is why I lost it this morning. When I suggest doing something, it is a not good enough idea, but he is happy to moan to me all the time and I thought, what does he want me to do? I can not do miracles. Sorry, now I sound negative myself. I am sure it will all be OK one day, it is just at the moment the longer we are at the house the tougher it gets for us, and he does not want to let go of it and there is me keep pushing him....

chivers1977

h4nym just wanted to say thanks for the link in that post. Really helpful but I don't have a thanks button in your post for some reason!

gerretl

debtomaniak. a few things occured to me while at work.
Lets go back to the restaurant thing, yeah.
A lot of restaurants are upgrading their computers to make use of bluetooth, touch screen. I did a search on google using the words 'catering epos systems' (epos stands for electronic point of sale), and got about 85,000 hits.
Your husband has huge experience installing systems, and again the restaurant thing. The skills picked up their would make him a natural for installing, setting up, and training staff and management.
First hit on google was https://www.haven-systems.co.uk
It may be worth a try, but the CV needs to show that time in the industry as a real learning curve. If I have time, and you don't think I'm being cheeky, I could write one up, and post it. I have done this for a few people, and they tended to get a shot at the job.

Debtomaniak

h4nym wrote:

Emmzi / Debtomaniak

Like I said - happy for you to PM me if you want to see my CV - there's another couple of other little things that I'd be happy to discuss with you!

Good luck

H

Thank you. Well done, your success story, gives us some hope, that one day we will be out of our troubles.:o

Debtomaniak

chivers1977 wrote:

The CV to me on first glance and as a non-recruitment person looks a bit long and scary with so much information in it. Would it be worth getting a careers adviser to pare it down a bit. I used to manage a bank branch -I know way below the level of his jobs - and TBH if I received a Cv with that much info, I wouldn't be bothered to read it.

I am sure everything will be OK with your OH. Maybe it will give him that extra "kick" to get going.....

Thank you, chivers1977. He has actually read this whole thread , when he told me tonight that he read it I thought "oh my god, he will be crossed with me", but he did not, and instead said he understands me and he was just scared that I would get fed up with all this and leave him.

He has noted advices on here will see if he puts it in practice.:o