Allocating housework amongst family - does this work for anyone?

Sarahsaver

I did think actually that if he does such long hours and earns more would there be something in the OP getting even less hours or stopping work and being a 'homemaker' as her career? It IS a valid life choice!
I didnt mean he should do loads its just like my OH is terrible at sorting papers/letters and so on so they go in a pile then a carrier bag and when theres enough they appear by the door ready for him to sort out.
Same with underwear, it maybe just a personal thing but i think relying on any other human being for clean underwear if you are an adult is not very grown up at all.

pigpen

In here I do the bulk of what gets done.. I am a SAHM. Hubby works FT.. (10-6ish) The children (3-16) do bits.. some more than others. I think out of my brood the 10 year old does the most.. soemtimes she whips the others into action .. we got up on Saturday morning to find them all rushing round the kitchen cleaning it while she stood timing them.. Actually stopping them trashing everything seems to be our difficulty rather than sharing the cleaning.

They are rewarded for tidying a room by being allowed to vacuum it.. they think that is a treat they love it!!
The older ones have done their own ironing since they were able/wanted ironed clothes.. I don't do it.. period.

I do ALL the washing.. I love it.
I wipe everything and make sure it is all clean.

basically all I expect from anyone else is that they tidy their own stuff.. and any mess they make.. sometimes on a weekend I'll have one of them load the dishwasher. The 3 year old empties and refills the washing machine.

It is a physical impossibility for little old singular me to clean the mess of 10 people, 2 cats and 3 rabbits... so it HAS to be a shared task.

gunsandbanjos

LizD wrote: »

He does tend to work longer hours than me and earns twice what I do, so the housework falls to me by default. I have tried asking him to tidy up after himself, which works for about a week then it goes back. I admit I'm not the tidiest person either, but I just get fed up when he doesn't do his bit.

How much he earns is not the issue, the fact that he works longer hours is. My hubby works much longer hours(and therefore earns more) than i do, so i do all the housework, shopping etc. I dont resent it as he is working bl00dy hard to pay our mortgage, put food on the table etc. If the roles were reversed i would expect him to do the same. I do laugh when he says, 'i'm never here so the mess isnt mine'. Ok, so its not your clothes i pick up from the bathroom every day, not your washing i do etc, etc:rotfl:

onlyoneme

Dear All

It seems all I am doing in my life is tidying things up after them. All I want them to do is to put the things back to where they belong once they finished with it - especially in the kitchen and the bathroom (their bedroom is their business!)

I am thinking of putting a note in the kitchen / bathroom to this effect -without sounding too boaring mum or nagging mum!

Any witty ideas please???

sunflower76

Why not start gathering their things up and putting them in their rooms on theirs beds? They then have the choice of putting things away properly or going for a shower / to brush teeth / have a wash etc and finding that the things they need aren't where they should be.

Do they pay for their own toiletries? Threatening to throw them away may work, especially if you follow it through once or twice.

annie123

I never worked it out, eldest is now 28 youngest 18.

When DD went through a phase of leaving clothes on the bathroom floor (from having just got into a bath) I picked them up and without her knowing washed and dried them then hid them in a cupboard.

After a while there was "has anyone seen my fav shirt,skirt/bra etc" when I said as you left dirty stuff on the floor I assumed you no longer wanted them and threw them out;) well it was the end of the world as she had to go out without the fav push up bra:rolleyes: OMG I was the worst mum in the world.

When I gave her back the now clean clothes and explained I was not her servant, she apologised and has never done it since.:D After that there was a lot more co operation with keeping things tidy and being responsible for ones own mess.

good luck

edit: I do note that now DS1 has his own flat he is tidy! when I commented on this he said "well your'e not here to clean it!"

onlyoneme

sunflower76 wrote: »

Why not start gathering their things up and putting them in their rooms on theirs beds? They then have the choice of putting things away properly or going for a shower / to brush teeth / have a wash etc and finding that the things they need aren't where they should be.

Do they pay for their own toiletries? Threatening to throw them away may work, especially if you follow it through once or twice.

Yes, I could try that with some of their stuff. But it's mostly stuff I paid for......So i can't really throw them or not even put things in their room.
it is usually things like they take the juice out of the fridge and then I find both juice and the glass on the work top. the cereal box never goes back in the cupboard, the crumps from the toast never cleaned off, hair gel is always next to the sink......the list goes on!

All I want them is to put thigs back in the cupboard. Why is it so bad...
To be honest I really don't remember being like this when I was young!

taplady

you're not alone I assure you! my 2 boys are exactly the same and no amount of nagging works. I dont remember being like this either but my Mum was a dragon - once she put the entire contents of my sisters room in black bags and threw them out of the window for the bin men when she wouldn't clean her room!:eek: she always kept it tidy from them on!:D although as an adult she's still untidy!:rolleyes:

whatatwit

*Twit pulls up a chair and starts to take notes*

I wish I could help, but I have an idle little crow that won't put stuff away. I often find the milk still out and the fridge door open

Penelope_Penguin

Hi there! We have a "Fly-dash" every day I'm in charge :rolleyes: and I allocate tasks for people to do. We do this for half an hour each evening, and it works :j

I'll add this thread to Allocating Housework to the Family later to keep ideas together.

Penny. x