when you divorced did you........

Swan_2

cloverfan wrote: »

Swan i am 33, i was with him since i was 15, we split on valentines day last year(when i got flowers in someone elses name and she got mine:mad:) This was the 8th one that i know of and after the one b4(best friend on my sofa:mad::mad::mad:) i was actually stupid enough to think he had changed but he hadnt.....so i decided i didnt want my children to see how things were between us and accept someone treating them like that when they were older or thinking it acceptable to do to someone else BUT ...........just sometimes it really hits home that i did genuinely think i would spend my whole life with this man, and i loved him so much and now i am on my own....and sometimes the thought of meeting someone else(a thought that is becoming more frequent i do admit:o) is scary!!!!!!!!!!! and so i thought it is time to get things moving re divorce etc...

i am rambling, sorry!

!!!!!!!!! that's dire! :mad:

& no you're not rambling, it's difficult emotive stuff & natural for you to feel the way you do

I will PM you

grastgirl

Oh my God, some men are.....I can't think of a word bad enough!

Edited to add: My mum kept Dad's name and then changed it to her new hubby's when she remarried. She also had had his name longer than her own, and probably also wanted to keep it for our sakes. There was never any mention that we would change our names.

red_devil

I kept my married name for a while. When son was older and also his dad had got remarried i changed my name to my lt partners name!

I dont believe you have to keep your married name. Its not your name its the name of the person you married. If you are no longer married then why keep the name.

Also if the husband remarries then there will be two of you with his surname. Bit embarrassing long term i think.

luxor4t

I kept my married name as my 'working' name as I worked in the civil service & lived in the London area my office covered.
My 'real' name was on the electoral roll, phone book, passport etc etc

starbump

My MIL kept her (first) married name through 2 divorces. I think I would definitely do the same - although I hope I never need to! It is nice to have the same name as your kids.

Careful_with_that_Axe

I reverted to my maiden name out of anger iyswim. It slightly upset my ex in-laws who are like a second family to me, but they understood why I did it and it is no longer an issue between us.

I wish you all the luck in the world with your new life which I am sure will be wonderful.

Jo_F

The option I took isn't on your list.

When I got divorced I didn't want to go back to my maiden name, and I didn't want to keep my married name, so after consultation with the kids, I changed my name by deed poll to my boyfriend's name, as I knew that one day we would probably marry anyway.

My kids still have their dad's surname, the only reason I won't change theirs is that their dad died and I don't want to upset their grandmother (who I actually get on with)

cazziebo

I hadn't changed my name so no option for that on the poll. I did change my children's name to mine so we would all have the same name. (which ex was fine with at the time.)

Dazi

No choice for me on the poll. Had children. Was never keen on my maiden name, so changed my name by deed poll to my mothers maiden name.

bestpud

I've separated but not divorced, but if we did divorce, I'd keep my married name.

I've had it longer than my maiden name so would find it very odd to change now and I prefer to have the same name as my children.

I have nothing against my ex either and I guess that is the deciding factor for most...